


Hellbound Heart

by Youkoartemis



Category: Hellraiser (Movies), One Piece
Genre: 'cause it's TRUE! XD, Body Horror, Creepy!Zoro, Dark, Demons, F/F, Got a comment saying Zoro "really is slutting it up on the grand line", He's not anymore, Hellraiser typical twisted and morally bankrupt content, Hellraiser typical violence and sadomasochism, Homophobic Language, Like how Brook is dead, M/M, Major Character Death...technically, Non-Human Character, Slow Burn, Specific trigger warnings will be added at the start of every chapter, The demons in Hellraiser are a very creepy sort of horny, This is a crossover with Hellraiser, This is not gonna be a light and happy-go-lucky story, Trans Male Character, Trauma, Unrequited Love, Violence, Zoro is gay and trans, Zoro was a Good Man, and that comment lives rent free in my head, transphobic language, undead character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:42:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 46
Words: 69,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27046681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Youkoartemis/pseuds/Youkoartemis
Summary: His name was Zoro. Roronoa...Zoro."...You're making a contract with me?"He was...19. He thinks. Or was he 21? 300? 1000? He... couldn't quite recall."Yeah!"It's fine. He knows his dream: He's going to be the World's Greatest Swordsman."Do you even know what you're asking?"Just like he'd promised, all those years ago."I already told you: I know exactly what I'm doing."He doesn't really need to remember anything else."We Have Such Sights To Show You."And the music box played on.
Relationships: Kaku/Roronoa Zoro, Nami/Nefertari Vivi, Roronoa Zoro/Sanji
Comments: 400
Kudos: 184





	1. The Descent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And so it begins...

_There was a soft, repetitive tune playing in the dark. It would be soothing, if it weren't for the strange, flickering blue light and the sounds of pained groaning that filled the air alongside the smell of blood._

_He walked into the room, freezing at what he saw. His eyes widened and his breathing sped up, mind gibbering in panicked denial._

_Monsters. Shaped almost like people, but clearly not. Twisted, tortured figures, and hanging by chains tipped in hooks…_

_His heart stopped._

_He knew that man. How could he not? He'd known him for years._ **_Loved_ ** _him for years. Sunshine blond hair, now matted with blood and sweat. Ocean blue eyes, shining with tears and pain. Milky pale skin, painted red with blood. Jaw clenched in agony._

_"What-" He rasped, tearing his eyes from the bound and tortured figure of the man he loved and onto the monsters who had done it to him. He swallowed thickly, and tried again, "What are you?"_

**_"Explorers of the furthest realms of experience. Angels to some, demons to others."_ ** _One of the beings answered in a deep, resonant voice that shook him to the core and made his knees weak, its abyss black eyes seeming to stare into his very soul._

_He trembled under the weight of that stare._

_"Why- What do you want with him?" He asked shakily, cold sweat running down his body._

**_"He called us; we came."_ ** _The creature with the pins in its head intoned._

_"But how?"_

**_"He opened the box."_ ** _It was started so simply, as though discussing the weather._

 **_"Should we take this one, as well?"_ ** _One of the other demons asked, female in figure and a gaping hole in its throat, held open by wires._

_The pinheaded one glanced dismissively over._

**_"No."_ ** _It decided._

 **_"No?"_ ** _The throatless one asked._

 **_"It is not his desire which calls us."_ ** _The lead creature stated with finality._

_"So you're… gonna take him to hell?" He asked, licking his lips and darting his eyes towards the man he loved and back to the creatures._

**_"Yes."_ **

_He took several shaky breaths, and opened his mouth._

_"...How about a deal?" He asked, wondering what the fuck he was doing. He must've gone insane._

_The pinheaded demon looked vaguely intrigued._

**_"What kind of deal?"_ ** _It asked, looking almost amused at his audacity._

_He licked his dry lips and shifted, breath coming in quick, short bursts._

_"Take me and not him." He said, trying to keep the pathetic fear and desperation out of his voice. He was certain he failed._

**_"Oh? Most mortals would beg for their own lives over another's, and yet you would offer_ ** **yourself** **_in place of this man?"_ ** _The demon asked, sounding intrigued and amused._

_He nodded, swallowing down as much of his soul rending terror as he could._

_"Yes. You all… You come after those with… Unnatural desires, right? Well. I'm a woman who desires to be a man… while also desiring to lay with men. So. I'd count, right?"_

**_"Your desires are not of Hell's purview."_ ** _The demon contradicted._

_"But the Church says-"_

**_"-Ah, the Church… Refuge of the wicked and the malevolent. Hell gets many of its occupants from within the ranks of the 'Righteous.'"_ ** _The demon sounded deeply amused._ **_"No, l'Olonnais, you are a Good Man and Hell has no claim to your soul."_ **

_Everything he had ever believed in had just been turned on its head. But..._

_"Well. If- if I am truly a Good Man… Would that not make me a better deal over him?" Oh, the truly stupid things he'd do for the man he loved…_

**_"Corrupting you_ ** **would** **_be a great pleasure."_ ** _The demon allowed._

_"Then take me instead of him."_

**_"Do you know what it is you ask?"_ **

_"Yes. I am aware. Take me instead."_

_The demon turned more fully towards him, smiling coldly._

**_"Very well then."_ ** _It intoned._

_The other demons crowded around him, leading him away. As he began to enter Hell, he turned back one last time, meeting the eyes of the man he loved… They were filled with disgust for him. The man he loved despised him. Was revolted by him. He turned back around, smiling bitterly at his feet._

_What had he expected?_

**_"Not getting cold feet, are you?"_ ** _One of the lesser demons asked._

_"No." He stated simply, "I made my choice. You all keep your end of the deal, and I'll uphold mine."_

**_"We shall see."_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the start of my Hellraiser/One Piece AU, which I've been toying with for months, now. It's gonna be dark, and creepy, and more than a little twisted. I have every expectation that there's gonna be some really fucked up shit going on in future chapters!
> 
> It's gonna... _loosely_ follow One Piece canon. I'm not gonna rewrite every aspect of canon, but certain scenes and snippets? Yeah. Hopefully I'll be able to keep up momentum with this story! I'd really like to explore this idea as much as I feel it deserves.


	2. The Contract

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro meets a boy who will become King.

Zoro woke with a start, the images already fading, leaving behind only the image of blue eyes full of disgust and the soft, haunting tune of a music box playing at the back of his mind… but that was normal.

He tested his arms, but they were still bound to the wooden stake behind him. The ropes were rough against his skin, and the cheaply cut wood left splinters. The hot sun seared down upon him, slowly baking him alive. How delightfully miserable! Such a shame that the beatings he was given were so pitiful, or he'd be having fun.

He sighed through his nose and closed his eyes, tilting his head up to the sky as he purposefully rolled his arms in the ropes, abrading his skin and sending tiny sparks of pain shooting through his senses. The pain was nothing, really - nowhere near enough to even be called "pain," in all honesty - but it was more entertaining than doing nothing at all. There was a pleasure to be had in the torturous tedium of boredom, but Zoro didn't much feel like indulging in it, at the moment, and it had never been his preferred type of torment, anyway.

Luckily, something came to interest him: A pair of heads, belonging to two separate boys. Young. Innocent. How  _ sweet. _

He bared his teeth at them in a grin.

"Hey. Why don't you come over here and untie me? I'm gettin' pretty sick of hangin' around out here. Let me loose, and I'll get you a good bounty." He tempted, staring hungrily at them. The pink-haired boy -  _ 'Coby, his name was Coby.'  _ A voice whispered in the back of Zoro's mind - flinched back in terror, but the boy with the straw hat…

_ 'Oh. Now  _ **_that's_ ** _ interesting.' _ He thought to himself, feeling something within himself sit up and take notice of this boy. It had been a long time since he'd last seen a True King…

His brain screeched to a stop.

_ 'Wait. "True King"? What does that even mean?'  _ He asked himself, but whatever had created the thought had already slipped through his fingers like sand, just like the rest of his memories. 

His mouth twisted downward and his eyes widened slightly as he sneered in frustrated rage, Zoro grudgingly let it go - he knew from experience that he'd never grasp the knowledge again no matter  _ how _ hard he strained his mind to remember. The bitterness was so sweet…

Movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention, and his sneer intensified as his heart twisted: It was that girl. Putting herself in danger.  _ For him. _

He needed to get her out of here.

"Get lost, kid." He snarled, baring his teeth.

She didn't so much as  _ flinch. _

"Um, I made these for you…" She said, holding out some rice balls to him. How very sweet of her, but she needn't have bothered - Zoro didn't need to eat.

~~ The dead have no need for food. ~~

And then the blond brat walked over, and she ended up tossed over the wall by cowards. How pathetic.

"Trying to get around our deal, Pirate Hunter?" The brat asked mockingly, as though he had the upper hand here. It was almost cute.

Almost.

"I won't go back on my end of the bargain unless you go back on yours." Zoro answered honestly, a nasty smile appearing on his face, "Are you thinking of breaking our contract, Helmeppo?" He asked, voice dropping down to a sensual purr, looking up through his lashes at the blond who suddenly took a sharp step back. 

Zoro's grin widened, sharp and bloodthirsty. He could almost  _ taste _ the boy's fear and weakness.

~~ He wanted to taste his pain. ~~

"O-of course not! You just stay out here and bake!" The brat stuttered, turning and quickly scampering away, no matter how he tried to disguise it as a saunter.

"Hey. You're that Pirate Hunter guy, right?" A new voice asked, drawing Zoro's attention.

"Ah. The straw hat boy." He acknowledged, before his eyes slid over to the other boy, "And his pink haired friend." The friend squeaked and ducked behind the boy with the straw hat, and Zoro leered at him for a moment before returning his attention to the one who interested him far more, "Decided to let me loose after all?" He asked with a vicious grin.

"You're supposed to be a really strong guy, right?" The straw hat -  _ 'Luffy. His name is Monkey D. Luffy.' _ \- said, tilting his head to one side with a pout, "You don't  _ look _ very strong all tied up here."

Zoro bared his teeth in a hungry grin.

"And you don't look like much of a king." He retorted.

"...How'd you know my dream? That's so cool!!" Luffy asked, eyes wide with delight and a beaming grin spreading across his face.

"Your desire's written all over you, dumbass." To Zoro, it was clear as day - grass grew, birds flew, and Monkey D. Luffy wanted to be King of the Pirates with every fiber of his being. The desire was so strong it nearly  _ choked _ Zoro just being in the presence of it.

He hadn't felt this way since-

Since…

The thought slipped from his mind like ashes.

Dammit! So close!!

"You're a pretty cool guy! You're Zoro, right?" Luffy asked, still beaming.

The name felt. Odd. Even after all this time. It was right, and yet at the same time, Zoro got the feeling it wasn't his  _ actual _ name. But it was the only name he knew. He'd known it since waking up on a random island two years ago with nothing on his person but a white sword, three golden earrings in his left ear, and a weird black leather outfit that hurt to wear  _ (but felt so good and right) _ .

"I'm Roronoa Zoro." He confirmed, "And you're Monkey D. Luffy."

Luffy looked pleasantly surprised.

"Oh! You've already heard of me? Shishishishishishi that's AWESOME!!"

"Heard of you? Not even close." Zoro contradicted, grinning as he punctured the boy's fantasies.

"Then how d'you know my name?"

"It's engraved in your soul." Zoro always knew the names and Desires of those he met; it was practically written all over them in neon colors. Sung to him in the banal little tune that never stopped haunting his every waking and dreaming moment.

Luffy looked  _ amazed, _ though, and Zoro felt just the slightest bit smug beneath the attention, a smirk pulling at his lips.

"So cool!!!!" There were  _ stars _ in Luffy's eyes. "You gotta join my crew!!!!"

"You would invite a demon onto your crew?" He asked, practically purring, danger written on every inch of himself. He leaned forward as much as he could while bound, eyes half-lidded and smile sharp and cold like the edge of one of his swords.

"Sure!!" Luffy agreed, grinning guilelessly.

"Do you even know what you're asking for?"

"'Course I do! I'm asking you to be my nakama!" Luffy answered, still grinning. There was resolve there, but...

"No." Zoro decided, looking away dismissively, "Not interested. Buzz off."

It was a lie, but so what?

And then Luffy came back the next day.

"Helmet's gonna break his promise to you."

"Oh?"

"Yeah; he's gonna kill you tomorrow."

"That so?"

"Yup; I heard him."

A feral grin spread across Zoro's lips.

"Guess that means I don't have to hold up  _ my _ end, then."

Luffy grinned back, devious and just a touch mean. 

"Yup!"

"So you gonna set me loose?" Zoro asked, smirking wickedly. He technically couldn't break his  _ own _ bindings until Helmeppo actually broke his end of the deal… but if Zoro didn't break his own binds… then it was fine.

Luffy tried, but the knots were too tight.

"You're a swordsman, right? Where's your swords?"

"The brat took 'em to the base."

"I'll go get 'em!" and Luffy rocketed off, stretching like rubber, to Zoro's amazement. He'd never seen anything like it! How  _ fascinating! _

And then Luffy returned with his swords.   


"There were three swords and I didn't know which was yours so I grabbed all of 'em!" He announced gleefully.

"All three swords are mine because I use three swords." Zoro said simply, "Now cut me loose."

"You gotta join my crew before I'll give these back!" Luffy said with a grin that said he knew he'd won.

"...You're making a contract with me?" Zoro asked, a bit incredulous.

"Yeah!"

"Do you even know what you're asking?" Zoro asked for the second time in as many days, almost amused as he tilted his head to one side, smirking.

"I already told you: I know exactly what I'm doing." Luffy sounded. Remarkably serious. Zoro could  _ feel _ his resolve, and could see that the boy truly  _ did _ understand something of what he was doing.

Zoro felt his cold, still heart begin beating in his chest as a grin spread across his face. This boy…

"And what do you want from me,  _ Monkey D. Luffy?" _ He purred, eyes going half-lidded as he felt the dark magicks stirring. The melody grew louder, clearer.

Closer.

"I want you to be my friend. My nakama." Luffy answered immediately.

"Oh? Not my loyalty? My strength? My  _ body? _ My  _ complete submission _ to your every desire?" Zoro asked, teeth bared and eyes glinting dangerously, "You could ask  _ anything _ of me, and I would be bound to obey."

Luffy stared into the dark abysses Zoro's eyes had become, will resolute and expression serious.

"I don't want Zoro to be my slave. I want Zoro to be my nakama." He said, and Zoro's breath was nearly stolen away by how the world itself seemed to bend beneath that indomitable  _ Will. _

_ 'A True King indeed…' _

"You would sell your soul just for my  _ friendship?" _ Zoro asked with a blink, a bit disbelieving.

Luffy simply stared back at him, resolve shining from every facet of his being, and Zoro found himself… Shaken.

"You'd go to heaven if you died, you know." Zoro said, though he didn't know how he knew or why he was bothering to mention it, "But if you go through with this, you will spend all of eternity experiencing Hell's pleasures."

Luffy's resolve didn't shake in the slightest.

"I made up my mind; I want you to be my nakama."

"Then in exchange for me being your nakama, you'll give me your soul?" Zoro asked, feeling the dark magicks welling up as the contract terms began to set. The tune that was always playing at the edges of his consciousness grew even louder.

"And your swords." Luffy added, causing Zoro to incline his head. The melody was almost deafening.

"And my swords." He agreed, before something welled up within him and words started spilling from his lips without him knowing where they came from.

**"In exchange for your soul and the return of my swords, I pledge myself to your service until either your death or your forfeiture by standing in Hell's way."** Zoro intoned, feeling the dread magicks brought forth by the words beginning to bind him to his new captain's will.  **"Do you accept?"**

"I accept."

**"So mote it be."** And the chains tightened before the magic faded, leaving Zoro shaken and more than a little confused about what had just happened.

He understood that Luffy was his Captain, now, though, and he would follow him to the ends of the universe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this look at the far *creepier* Zoro that exists in this story! He's actually really fun to write, with all his sharp angles and twisted morality!


	3. The Thief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro has a chat with the new girl.

Not too long after, Zoro's new captain managed to get himself captured by a bird, leading to an honestly stupid sequence of events in which they met a clown and a thief.

Zoro got stabbed and had a decent fight, though, so at least it wasn't a  _ complete _ waste of time, and the thief was  _ interesting. _ Such a  _ devastating _ hatred of pirates, and paired with a desire that didn't match how she acted at all… She  _ claimed _ money to be her primary interest, and yet…

_ 'She desires freedom, above all else.' _ A voice at the back of Zoro's mind whispered.

It was especially funny how she thought she could get away from Zoro's captain.

"This is just an alliance! I'm not joining your crew!" Nami insisted, glaring sternly at them both.

Zoro smirked and leaned back against the side of the small ship he and his captain were sharing.

"The captain's decided you're gonna be his navigator." He said simply, as though discussing the weather. If Luffy wanted her as his navigator, then he would  _ have _ her as his navigator.

She narrowed her eyes at him, but apparently chose to ignore his statement.

"And how'd the infamous  _ Pirate Hunter _ end up becoming a pirate, anyway?" She asked, hand on her hip.

Zoro debated momentarily, then decided he may as well be honest.

"He made a contract with me."

Nami frowned, tilting her head to one side, looking suspicious and perplexed.

"...He made a deal with you?" She asked, seeking clarity.

"If that's how you wanna phrase it, sure."

She looked even more confused.

"What  _ kind _ of deal?"

"He made me an offer; I took it." That was rather the  _ point _ of deals, after all.

Nami growled and shifted, glaring as fiercely at him as she could. It was kind of adorable that she thought she could intimidate him.

"And  _ what _ did he offer you?" She demanded.

"My swords and his soul." Zoro answered easily, tilting his head back against the rail, seeking to take a nap.

Nami's eyes went wide in shock, and her face paled. She let out a distinctly nervous laugh. 

"You're joking, right?" She asked, grinning insincerely in an attempt to seem casual. 

"You can think that if it makes you feel better." Zoro offered with a shrug. He honestly didn't really care one way or the other.

"You can't.  _ Really _ sell souls." Nami said, crossing her arms over her chest in an attempt to hug herself for comfort.

Zoro said nothing in response, because she wasn't actually speaking to  _ him: _ She was attempting to reassure  _ herself. _

"Okay, so, ignoring the creepy bullshit… What did you give him in return?"

"Everything. For as long as he lives and doesn't stand in the way, I am his to do with as he pleases."

Nami turned a bit green, and she glared.

"He demanded that of you?!" She asked, sounding oddly outraged.

Zoro wasn't sure why she was so mad about what he'd said, and frowned slightly. Those terms were standard procedure for contracts, right? Yes, he was  _ sure _ of it.

"What's got you all pissy, witch?" He asked, tilting his head back down to frown at her. 

"Oh, I dunno, maybe the fact that you just told me he made you sell yourself into  _ slavery _ to him?!!!!" She screeched.

Ah, how piercing! That nearly burst his eardrums!  _ Damn _ that felt good. Still...

"He didn't  _ make _ me do anything." Zoro said, getting annoyed at her continued failure to understand what he was saying to her.

Nami's frustration reached new levels of ear piercing volume. 

"YOU told me that you gave him, and I quote,  _ EVERYTHING _ in return for what he gave you!! And then followed up by describing  _ slavery!!" _

"Yeah, but that's just standard contract stuff." Zoro said with a dismissive wave, "All  _ he _ asked for was that I become one of his nakama."

Nami froze up, just gaping at him in blank incomprehension.

"You- That is  _ NOT _ "standard contract stuff," oh my  _ god, _ Zoro!!!" She sounded almost legitimately distressed. How odd.

Zoro tilted his head, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning quizzically at her. 

"It absolutely is." He said firmly.

"No it's  _ not!!"  _

_ "Yes, _ it  _ is." _ He denied, "He sought a contract with me, and  _ purposefully and knowingly _ sold me his soul in exchange for my loyalty. I am therefore bound into his service until either his death or his betrayal of the terms of the contract. At which point  _ he _ is beholden to  _ me." _ He explained, giving her a grin that was all teeth and no kindness, and watching her shiver in response.  _ "And he'll answer to me for the rest of eternity." _

"You're insane." She all but whimpered, clutching at herself, "You're completely and totally insane!"

A quote came suddenly to his mind. He didn't know where from, but it was oddly fitting.

"We're all mad here." He said softly, voice lilting in a way it usually didn't, eyes unfocused. The tune was so loud in the back of his head… 

He snapped back to reality, the thread of memory vanishing from his mind when Nami shuddered and began backing away. 

"Well, this has been  _ great,  _ but I  _ really _ gottagobye!!!" She beat a hasty retreat back to her own ship.

Zoro watched her go, and wondered:  _ 'How long before her desires come into conflict with Luffy's?' _

He didn't think it would be very long, somehow. 


	4. A Brief Discussion of Moral Boundaries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro has another talk with his nakama. This one goes slightly better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for: Heavily Implied Past Non-Con and Zoro Being A *Creep*

"Is he…  _ always _ like that?" Usopp asked Nami, nervously glancing over at Zoro, who'd only  _ just _ stopped staring at him like he was contemplating how best to tear him apart.

Nami nodded, staring at Zoro with her eyes narrowed.

"He's nuts. Completely insane. I know Luffy said that he's "talked to Zoro about it," and that Zoro "won't hurt nakama," but I honestly don't know how or why Luffy trusts him so much." She said back, frowning and nervously worrying at her lower lip with her teeth, "But I guess Zoro  _ did _ tell me he's basically Luffy's slave…? So maybe that's why?"

"Wait,  _ what?" _ Usopp asked, turning to stare at her with wide eyes.

"Yeah; I asked Zoro why he joined up, and he said Luffy  _ sold him his soul _ and in return he'll do  _ anything _ Luffy wants him to! It's insane! He's totally crazy!!"

"Not really." Zoro's voice interjected, making them both screech and leap in the air before turning slowly to stare at him in terror.

"O-o-o-oh h-h _ eeyyyyy _ there, Zoro! Haha… Ha… How much of that did you hear…?" Usopp asked, grinning nervously and  _ trying _ to act casual, but the wild shaking of his knees and voice betrayed him.

"All of it." The swordsman answered promptly and uncaringly, walking past the frozen figures of Usopp and Nami to get to the fridge, opening it, reaching in to grab a bottle of booze, and casually pulling the cork out with his teeth. He made direct eye contact with Usopp as he rolled his tongue around the cork to collect every last drop of the booze from it, eyes half-lidded. 

He broke eye contact to spit the cork into the trash, then chugged the bottle, pulling back after a few seconds with a sigh of satisfaction, licking his lips and shooting them both a smirk as he looked at them through his lashes.

"Is it true? Are- Are you- Are you Luffy's  _ sex slave?!" _ Usopp burst out, looking  _ horrified _ at himself the moment the words left his lips. He slapped his hands over his mouth with a squeak, staring wide-eyed at Zoro like he expected the swordsman to chop him up for the offense.

Zoro hummed, tilting his head to one side.

"No." He answered simply, taking another draw from the bottle in his hand, "He has no interest in that stuff."

"...Are you saying that's the only reason you're  _ not _ his sex slave ?"  Nami asked, incredulous enough to forget her own terror.

Zoro frowned slightly, thinking.

"...He's also a bit…  _ young _ for my tastes." He answered, just a bit hesitant, as though the fact he didn't truly find his captain sexually attractive was somehow a personal failing.

Usopp breathed a sigh of relief.

"Oh, then that means you're not interested in  _ me, _ either!" He exclaimed with a relieved, slightly hysterical laugh.

"I'd enjoy making you enjoy what I'd do to you... but yeah, you're too young for me to actually pursue like that." Zoro admitted, looking vaguely disappointed.

"So what exactly  _ is _ the cut-off point for you?" Nami asked, hoping against hope that it would start at 18 and therefore exclude her.

"17 is the  _ absolute youngest _ I'll go for, and even then only if I'm  _ ordered _ to." Zoro stated instantly, grimacing in distaste, upper lip curling, "Pedophilia's not a sin I have any interest in. S'fucking disgusting."

Well, it was honestly relieving to know that the scary murderer they shared a ship with had  _ some _ standards, at least!

"And...what about girls?" Nami asked, still desperately hoping that she, too, was excluded from Zoro's list of potential victims.

Zoro wrinkled his nose slightly, grimacing a little, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, actually  _ blushing _ slightly and looking  _ uncomfortable, _ of all things, "When given the choice… I don't. Generally choose to pursue  _ women. _ I will if Luffy orders me to, but..."

"So you have no interest in me at all?" Nami asked, feeling  _ so _ relieved.

"While it  _ would _ be a delight to show you pleasures you've never experienced…" He said slowly, a bit hesitant, "I have no actual desire for you, no."

"Oh thank God!" Nami exclaimed, slumping in relief.

Zoro frowned at them both, as though just realizing something.

"...I wasn't gonna jump either of you even if I  _ did _ desire you, y'know." He said, mildly offended.

They gave him disbelieving looks, and his frown deepened.

"I'm not  _ that _ twisted!" He protested, actually a little bit  _ hurt, _ "I'd've stopped if you'd told me to! You're  _ nakama!" _

That  _ meant _ something to Zoro; nakama were. They were  _ special! _ He wouldn't- He wouldn't hurt them like that. He may not  _ really, fully _ grasp _exactly_ what constituted "consent," but. He wasn't gonna-

He wouldn't-

Not like-

~~_ Ice cold hands grabbing too hard too tight he didn't want this he didn't want them touching him stopstopstopstopstoppleasehedoesn'twantthis- _ ~~

~~**_"Oh, don't cry yet, sweet thing - we haven't even gotten to the_ ** **fun** **_part!"_ ** ~~

Zoro gasped harshly as his mind was abruptly wrenched back to reality to meet the eyes of his captain, who was patting his cheek with one warm hand, looking concerned. Zoro instinctively leaned into the touch, nuzzling the boy's hand; his captain was safe, and warm. Nothing like…

Like...

Huh.

It was already gone, leaving only the nauseating shame and terror behind, with nothing to explain  _ why _ he felt any of that. It left him off balance and _deeply_ shaken.

The melody was so loud and discordant he could barely think.

"It's okay, Zoro. I won't let them hurt you again." Luffy told him, eyes dark and serious.

Something occurred to Zoro, distantly, as he stared uncomprehendingly at his captain.

"...Where's your hat?" He croaked out, unsteady and shaken.

"Zoro's wearing it." Luffy answered simply.

Now that he mentioned it… Zoro reached up to the foreign weight atop his head, and, sure enough, there was Luffy's straw hat.

"...How shameful, to lose control like this." He said softly, frowning in disappointment with himself as his terror faded. He'd stopped reacting so pitifully  _ years _ ago, so why…? 

(Stopped reacting to  _ what, _ though? He couldn't remember. Why couldn't he remember? Why couldn't his brain hold onto even a  _ single _ memory from his past?)

"Zoro shouldn't be so hard on himself." Luffy stated, nodding firmly, "Zoro's nakama, and I love him. Zoro being scared of some stuff doesn't change that."

Yes… They  _ were _ nakama, weren't they?

Zoro's lips quirked up in a small smile.

It was… Nice. Having someone who cared about him.

And Luffy had proven time and again that he really _did_ care about Zoro, even adamantly refusing to use the unlimited control he had over him through the contract binding them together. He really, _truly_ wanted nothing from Zoro but his friendship.

So Zoro would give him  **_everything,_ ** freely and of his own will.

** How could he give anything  _ less _ to this boy who made him feel like he had  _ worth _ beyond just what his body could do? **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys just got a glimpse into exactly how Fucked Up Zoro is! [slaps the roof of Zoro] This bad boy holds ***So Much Trauma!!***
> 
> Also the ZoLu is apparently REAL in this story! I honestly hadn't even set out to make this a ship in the story? But then Zoro and Luffy were like "actually we're extremely queerplatonic for each other" and I'm like "oh, alright!"


	5. The Cook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro meets a man who is both familiar and not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for: Homophobic Language, Zoro being UNBELIEVABLY creepy, Sexual Content, Violence

It was nice to see Johnny and Yosaku again. Zoro hadn't exactly _missed_ them, but it was an unexpected pleasure to meet them again after they'd parted ways over a year ago.

Even _better_ was that they brought a clue to finally encountering Hawk Eyes. A grin split Zoro's face at the thought of finally challenging the World's Greatest Swordsman and seeing how close he was to accomplishing his dream.

They arrived at the restaurant: A boat shaped like a fish. How quaint! 

The food was good, Zoro had to admit. He may not _need_ to eat (and he may not know _why_ he knew that was a fact), but that didn't mean it wasn't an enjoyable vice to indulge in anyway.

And then Zoro saw him. 

~~_Milky skin painted with blood blond hair matted rusty brown bright blue eyes filled with disgust and revulsion hates me hatesmehatesmehatesme_ ~~

Zoro blinked, and tilted his head to one side, regarding the blond man closely. He wasn't sure how, but he _knew_ this man. He knew him, even if he didn't remember how or why.

The ever-present melody echoed oddly as a second iteration of it played from some distant, long-forgotten memory like a dream, ever-so-slightly out of alignment with the first.

It had been _so long…_

~~_A daisy. Pure white symbol of innocence. Petals plucked off one by one. He loves me. Pluck. He loves me not. Pluck. He loves me. Pluck. He loves me not. Pluck. He loves me. Pluck. He loves me not. Pluck. He loves me._ ~~

~~_The last petal is violently torn away._ ~~

~~_He loves me_ **_NOT._ ** ~~

Zoro _ached_ in ways he couldn't remember ever experiencing with an _intensity_ that eclipsed any other torture he'd ever experienced. Such sweet, _agonizing_ sorrow...

He _wanted_ this man. More than anyone he'd ever seen in his life. More than _anything_.

It was maddening. 

It was exhilarating.

Zoro wanted more.

Zoro wanted to make this man **_scream_ **. To torture him with such sweet torments and twist him up until he was unrecognizable as the man he'd once been. 

Zoro wanted the man to make _him_ scream. He wanted to paint this man's skin in his blood until you could no longer see his skin beneath what was left of Zoro. 

He wanted the man to rip open his chest and wrap those slender, delicate hands around his heart and **_squeeze_ ** until nothing remained.

He wanted it with an intensity that nearly left him _panting_ with desire.

He wanted to **_ruin_ ** this man.

~~Break him like he'd broken Zoro.~~

And then the man came over and knelt before Nami, holding up a rose and declaring his love for her.

Zoro _ached,_ and still wasn't quite sure _why,_ but yet… He wasn't surprised.

~~It had always been like that, after all.~~

It was… Honestly vaguely painful to watch the man fawn over Nami. Not from heartache, although that was also true… Mostly just from how _shamefully_ the man was acting.

And yet… Zoro still wanted him.

Zoro had always had such _dreadful_ taste in men...

It seemed his captain was thinking along similar lines, however, because Luffy invited the man to join the crew immediately after the owner of the restaurant kicked the cook into the table Zoro, Nami, and Usopp were sitting at for causing a commotion.

The man refused Luffy's offer, but Zoro knew that what his captain wanted, his captain inevitably _got._ And if events conspired to try and thwart his captain's will… Zoro would step in to _make_ it happen.

The cook set their table back up… And immediately resumed fussing over Nami, pouring her a drink and flirting with her.

"Of _course_ you don't have to pay for your meal!!" Sanji exclaimed, making heart eyes at Nami, who hugged him in a blatant - and _successful_ \- manipulation attempt. He then glared at Zoro and Usopp, "You two still have to pay, though."

"WHAT?!" Usopp exclaimed, outraged.

Zoro's eyes gleamed at the challenge he saw in the cook's eyes, a smirk sliding across his face.

"How shameful to let yourself be so easily manipulated." He commented, looking up at the cook through his lashes.

The blond immediately turned a vicious glare upon him.

"There's no shame in honoring a lady's request, you uncultured brute!" He snapped back.

Zoro sat up a little further, smirk growing as his heart began to beat in response to the tension.

"You flirt, and you play, but it doesn't fill the hole in you, does it?" He asked, viciously picking at what he _knew_ was a weak spot, "You're _bored_ and want more than your current lot in life." He leaned forward, "We can give that to you." He offered, voice dropping into a purr full of dark promise, smile silky and razor sharp with just a _hint_ of teeth as he looked up through his lashes at the man, _"I_ can give that to you. I can show you pleasures beyond your wildest imaginings."

The man was torn between unease, longing, and anger at Zoro's words. There was a faint pink tinge to his cheeks, and Zoro _knew,_ deeply and intimately, that the man had felt a spark of _desire_ for him, at those words, yet was covering it up with anger and disgust.

_Exquisite~._

"Are you _propositioning_ me?!" The cook asked with a tone of forced calm, teeth clenched around the filter of his cigarette as anger won out over desire, "I'm _flattered,_ but I only love _ladies."_

 _'What a lovely liar~.'_ The voice in Zoro's subconscious crooned.

"I think we _both_ know that's not true." Zoro purred, grin widening in anticipation of the blond's response.

A snarled screech of rage and suddenly there was a foot in his face, sending him flying out of his seat and crashing into a nearby table.

Zoro sat up and flicked out his tongue to lap up the wet he felt dripping down from his nose. Ah… _blood~_ How _delightful~!_

He rolled his neck and shoulders to loosen them back up, licking the blood from his face one more time, slower this time, to savor it. He shot the cook a lusty look from half-lidded eyes as he did, pupils dilated with barely restrained desire.

"Mmm~... You _tease_ ~." He groaned, tongue flicking out over his split lip, "If you'd wanted to move to foreplay, you should've just _told_ me!" He ran a finger through the blood dripping from his nose and stuck the finger in his mouth, curling his tongue around the appendage in a lewd display as he licked the blood off of it, "Then again…" He pulled the finger out with a soft, wet 'pop,' lustily licking his lips afterwards, "It's more fun if you _don't_ tell me first."

He tilted his head and gave the cook a smile filled with dark promise and bloody teeth. He could _feel_ how the man desired, and how he refused to acknowledge that desire. He was such a _tease~._ Zoro would _enjoy_ pulling those desires out of him.

"You're fucking _sick."_ The cook spat, staring at him with wide eyes, face flushed with shocked, disgusted mortification...and _want_. Zoro could tell.

~~Zoro could _always_ tell. ~~

Zoro simply smiled at him in response, standing up and calmly taking his seat at the table once more.

He had time to pry those desires out of the cook, because he'd be joining the crew.

Luffy wanted him, after all.

\-----

The very next day, every thought of the cook was wiped from Zoro's mind, because _Hawk Eyes_ had shown up. The man agreed to fight him and proceeded to all but stab Zoro in the heart with the smallest sword Zoro had ever seen, then split him nearly in half with a single strike from his _actual_ sword.

For the first time since he had woken up in this world… Zoro felt something he could truly label as _PAIN,_ and it was **_incredible._ **

He moaned loudly and writhed in blissful agony, cumming with a strangled gasp and an almost _violent_ shudder, toes curling and back arching as he was dragged onto a small boat by Johnny and Yosaku, who began desperately trying to clean and stitch shut the wound that was splitting him from shoulder to hip.

With a shaking fist, Zoro lifted his one remaining sword into the air; the one which had been there with him when he'd first awakened; the one upon which his Promise was made.

"Luffy!! I'm sorry! I lost!! But I swear to you!! **_I will never lose again!_ ** That alright with you, **_Pirate King?!"_ ** He swore to his King, crying in pain, and bliss, and renewed determination. He knew now, how far he had yet to go to achieve his dream, and he already ached to intensify his efforts to grow stronger to reach it.

"Shishishishishi! Of course, Zoro!" The Boy Who Would Be King agreed, and Zoro _knew_ his boy king was grinning, and couldn't restrain a wild grin of his own as he passed into the waiting darkness.


	6. Arlong Park, pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fishmen feel pain same as any other beings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for violence

Zoro woke up on a ship with Johnny and Usopp.

"Zoro-aniki! You're finally up!" Johnny cheered, "We're almost to Arlong Park!"

"That's where the witch took Merry?" Zoro asked, playing catch up.

"That's right!"

Zoro grunted to acknowledge this, and started to try and push himself to his feet.

"W-wait a minute, Zoro-aniki!" Johnny stuttered, grasping Zoro's shoulders and trying to push him back down. 

"You're still wounded! You shouldn't be moving around!!" Usopp chimed in, also pushing Zoro back down.

"I'm fine." Zoro said, putting his hand over Johnny's, getting a shiver from the other man, who backed off, looking worried. A glance at Usopp had the sniper backing off, too, though he looked terribly worried.

Zoro stood up, relishing in the pain of the stitches being pulled with each movement, along with the lingering agony of the wound itself. He shuddered, mind clouding momentarily in bliss before he shook it off and focused. They were about to enter enemy territory; he couldn't afford to indulge himself here.

Ultimately, however… He ended up captured by a fishman and taken to Arlong Park after being abandoned by Johnny and Usopp.

That suited him just fine.

\-----

Zoro looked at the thief, with the tattoo of Arlong's jolly roger on her shoulder, and the cold, cruel look on her face. She was acting tough, but Zoro could see her true desires didn't match up with what she was saying.

_ 'Please, please get me out of here I want to be free!' _ Her heart whispered to the tempo of the melody in his head.

"You really think I didn't know your desires would run contrary to my captain's?" Zoro asked, amused, a small, patronizing smile tilting his lips up as he snickered at her, "I knew from the start, but my captain decided he wanted you anyway, and what my captain wants, my captain gets." The smile on Zoro's face looked calm and  _ almost _ pleasant, but there was a dark look in his eyes that promised that blood would be spilled.

"You'll just have to learn that for yourself." And with those words, Zoro flung himself backwards into the ocean, forcing Nami to act on her true desires.

She "saved" him, of course.

He'd known she would; she  _ hated _ Arlong, and she'd been happy while sailing with Luffy's crew.

\-----

After finally reuniting with his captain, Zoro learned that Luffy had, indeed, recruited the blond cook who called so strongly to Zoro's soul. He ached  _ deliciously _ at their first fight upon meeting again, but as much as he'd love to keep playing with the cook, he had to trouble with some business, first.

Namely… Nami's sister was telling them all about Nami's past, which Zoro  _ truly _ didn't care about. Besides: He could already guess, just based on the witch's desires. So he walked off after his captain, following the bond forged by the contract.

His captain was with Nami, and their desires were finally converging.

Good.

A small smile appeared on Zoro's face as he watched from the shadows, content that his captain was getting what he wanted.

\-----

As they faced off against the fishmen, Zoro's wounds reopened, and his blood spilled freely beneath the bandages. His head spun, and things grew…  _ Clearer. _

The music box's tune was even more complex than usual; more  _ complete, _ and in the distance, he thought he could almost hear the deep, ominous tolling of a large bell…

He straightened his back, and the pain burned so good.

**"Tell me, Hachi, which exhilarates you more: The pain, or the pleasure?"** He asked, the words coming to him as though from a dream and leaving his mouth in a conversational tone, voice echoing oddly.

His lips quirked up almost conspiratorially as trails of red ran down his face from the middle of each eye, almost like tears of blood, splitting his face in three with surgical precision.

**"Personally, I prefer pain."** And he lunged forward, sliding between the blades held in Hachi's eight arms and slammed shoulder first into the fishman, toppling him over. 

Zoro grinned wildly around Wado Ichimonji's hilt, staring down into the fishman's terrified eyes as he climbed atop him, his own eyes glittering with malevolence. One hand rose to cup Hachi's cheek and run down his face in a gesture that appeared almost  _ tender _ ...until the blood began to drip down from where Zoro's suddenly sharp nails were digging in.

**_"Scream for me."_ ** He purred as he abruptly plunged the sword he'd borrowed from Yosaku into the fishman and dragged it down, rending flesh and dragging a tortured  _ howl _ from the fishman beneath him. He dragged the sharp nails of his other hand down the octopus man's flesh, as well, splitting it asunder before reaching for the sword he'd borrowed from Johnny.

He laughed, high and cruel.

The bell tolled, and the tune played on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hachi's not dead, btw. Just pretty fucked up.
> 
> Things didn't really diverge from canon in this part, but I kinda had to touch on this part of canon anyway. Plus a couple hints of Zoro's darkest side...
> 
> The after party is where things get more interesting. >;)


	7. Arlong Park, pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro's memories have always been difficult to grasp. Sanji has always pulled at that which lay beyond Zoro's reach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for: mentions of past torture, identity confusion

He was napping against an alley wall during the party after the battle at Arlong Park, feeling sated and content. He cracked open one eye when he heard footsteps approaching and sitting down across from him.

It was Sanji.

The familiar twinge of intense heartache and longing hit him, but he pushed it aside with ease, letting his eye close again. He cracked the eye back open when he heard something placed down beside him.

"Here. Figured you could use some food, since I didn't see you taking part in the festivities." The cook said, and something in Zoro ached deeper at the kindness offered to him.

"...Thanks."

"You mind if I light up?" Sanji asked, eyes flicking up to look at him.

"Nah, go ahead." Zoro answered with a wave of his hand as he picked up the plate and began picking at the food. He wasn't hungry, but the cook had gone out of his way to bring it to him, so he wouldn't waste that effort.

Sanji struck a match and lit his cigarette, inhaling and then letting the smoke out with a soft groan of pleasure that had heat shooting straight to Zoro's groin.

"So what the hell happened while I was in the water?" Sanji asked after a minute of silence, turning his head to look at Zoro, "I got back up and there was blood everywhere and you looked fucking _deranged."_

The tune got a little louder as Zoro frowned slightly, his eating slowing as his eyes went unfocused.

"I don't… remember." He admitted slowly, trying to grasp at the memories he _knew_ had to be there, but they weren't coming to him, even though they were so close he could almost just reach out and touch them.

"You don't remember." Sanji repeated flatly, staring at him. He didn't seem like he believed Zoro, and Zoro couldn't fault him for that, really.

"...I don't remember much of anything at all." Zoro admitted softly, looking down at the plate in his lap, "Just my name, my dream, and my skills. That's it."

"Shit…" Sanji breathed, looking vaguely sympathetic, "Nothing at all?"

Zoro shrugged uncomfortably, shifting to look out at the partygoers.

"I know they're there. They come back, sometimes, but then… They're gone again. Trying to hold onto 'em's like trying to hold water in my hands - just runs right back out, no matter how hard I try." He said, looking despondent, "S'fine, though: They'll either come back, or they won't. No sense wasting time worryin' about it."

The cook frowned in mild concern at him.

"I remember everything I need to." Zoro said, vision blurring as his eyes unfocused, hands rising to grab hold of his arms, as though to hug himself, "It's fine. I don't need to remember anything else." His hands shook, nails digging into the skin of his arms, "I don't need to remember." He repeated, breath beginning to rasp as his breathing slowly grew faster and faster, "I don't-"

~~_Chains, hooks, screams piercing through darkness, knives digging in rending his flesh blood so much blood everywhere guts spread out in front of him hands touching him everywhere and nowhere it hurt it hurt ithurtithurtithurtso_ ** _good_** _he wanted it to stop he never wanted it to stop please no stop yes keep going please_ **_please-_**~~

"Oi." The cook's voice broke through his thoughts, and the memories faded from his mind like dust in the wind, "Oi, oi." A couple of finger snaps and he turned to stare blankly in the cook's direction.

He wasn't sure where he was, but he knew the man across from him. Of course he did: He was the man he'd been in love with for years.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry, I don't know what came over me." He said with a small, slightly bashful smile.

The man he loved stared at him with something approaching concern.

"Are you feelin' alright, Marimo?" The man asked, lowering his cigarette, and while he'd normally be _delighted_ to have this level of attention from the man he'd loved… Something stuck out to him.

"...Marimo?" He asked, tilting his head to the side with a small frown.

"...Yeah? 'Cause you have green hair?"

His frown deepened. His hair wasn't green; it was black. 

Wasn't it?

He reached up and pulled down a strand, and-

Oh.

It.

Was definitely green.

How odd.

It hadn't been green yesterday. 

Had it?

He felt cold, and something was gnawing at the edges of his awareness, screaming that things were very, very wrong.

"Oh." He heard himself say, as through from a great distance.

Something was playing.

"Do you… Hear that, by any chance?" He asked out loud, trying to focus but finding it very difficult through the rising panic and feeling of Wrongness.

"Hear what?"

"The music."

"Like from the party?"

"No. Not- I don't think so? It's- It sounds like a music box…?" It kept repeating and echoing in his head, the same few notes over and over, flat and ever-so-slightly discordant.

The man stared at him in open concern, now.

"...No, I don't." He said, and that choking feeling of panic grew, "Are you okay?"

He let out a slightly hysterical laugh, clutching at his head and giving the man he loved an unbalanced look.

"I don't believe I've been okay for a very, _very_ long time." He admitted with a wobbly, very fake smile.

~~_Endless hallways branching every direction screams echo, agonized and blissful darkdarkdarkdark where was he? Nowayinnowayoutnowayinnowayout he screamed and screamed and screamedandscreamedand_ ** _screamed-_ ** ~~

It felt like a door was slammed shut in his mind, sealing everything behind it.

Zoro sat there, thoughts still.

"Zoro…?" Sanji asked hesitantly.

"I'm… Sorry. About that." Zoro started, voice soft as he stared at the ground, head in his hands.

"What the fuck _was_ that?" The cook asked, eyes wide, clearly deeply perturbed.

Zoro remained silent for a long moment, trying to figure things out, himself.

"I don't know." He finally answered, voice small, "But I'm kinda glad it's centered on _you."_

"What?!"

Zoro lifted his head to look Sanji in the eye.

"You're strong, cook. Strong enough to stop me if I go too far." He said, "More importantly, you're not too scared of me to do what you have to do to stop me. Nami and Usopp aren't strong enough to stop me, and Luffy… I don't know if he _would_ stop me. But _you?_ You could, and you _would,_ if you had to. So I'm glad it's you this… _whatever_ is wrong with me has fixated on."

Sanji settled slightly, lighting up another cigarette and frowning at him.

"...I guess that makes sense." He agreed somewhat reluctantly, inclining his head just a little.

Zoro sighed through his nose.

"I'm not- I don't intend to _act_ on the desire I have for you. I'll look, and I'll flirt, but I _swear to you_ that I won't touch. Not unless you ask me to." He told Sanji seriously, holding his gaze to try and impress on the cook how much he meant what he was saying, then, in a softer voice, he added, "You're _nakama."_

The cook took a long, slow drag of his cigarette and let it out equally slowly, expression unreadable.

"That _is_ a relief to hear. I'm not gonna lie and say I'm _thrilled_ that you'll still be "flirting" with me, but I can live with that so long as you keep your hands to yourself." He said with a slow nod.

"I can do that." Zoro agreed, nodding back. He was so glad the cook at least wasn't rejecting him entirely. That would've made sailing with the crew really awkward.

"Good. Then we won't have any issues." Sanji said with finality, standing up and stretching. Zoro's eyes flickered to the bow of the cook's back, and the understated strength of the man's body, but, as promised, he did nothing more than look. 

"Later, Marimo." With that, the cook walked off, and Zoro watched him go, wanting _so badly_ to touch, but he wouldn't.

Not unless Sanji asked him to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zoro is really messed up on every level. Poor guy. Why do I do this to him?


	8. A Curse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, but of course a curse would sing to a demon's soul.

"We're heading to Loguetown to stock up one last time before we enter the Grand Line." Nami reminded them all.

"How long will we be sticking around?" Zoro asked, wondering if he'd have time to find some… _company,_ or if he'd only have the time to hunt for replacement swords.

Nami hummed, considering the weather. 

"We can't stay long: Feels like there's a storm brewing." She said, frowning slightly, "And we wouldn't want to stick around for too long, anyway: Loguetown's got a big marine presence on it."

Zoro hummed in acknowledgement, frowning in mild disappointment. Only time to go sword hunting, then. Shame; the port was so full of sin that he could almost _taste_ it. Such a shame he wouldn't get the chance to _actually_ taste it…

But there were always other ports with other sinners to show the pleasures of Hell to, so Zoro wasn't too put out about it.

He _was,_ however, put out about the interest rate the witch charged for borrowing money to get replacement swords, but Luffy said he wasn't allowed to maim nakama, so she got to continue on with all her limbs intact.

For now.

\-----

While searching for a sword shop, Zoro met a woman who looked so much like... 

Like…

 _'Kuina…'_ His mind whispered, but not the same part that spoke of desires; something deeper down and nearly lost, ~~_'Me.'_ ~~

She wasn't him, though. She was much too good, and kind ~~and weak~~. It felt like looking in a twisted mirror of who he could've been, in another world. One where he wasn't Zoro. One where he wasn't a man. ~~One where all his greatest fears became a reality~~. It infuriated him. He hated this woman. This... _Tashigi._ He wanted to **_hurt_** her. How _dare_ she remind him of those things?!

But she was a Good Person, so he couldn't touch her unless she got in the way. How vexing.

But he had no time for paying attention to those who ultimately didn't matter: Something was calling to him. Singing to the tune that played in Zoro's mind. Of blood, and darkness, and wild, undirected rage. Of death and debts that must be paid.

Of _curses._

The feeling pulled him to a sword shop, and he stepped in.

The shopkeep tried to get him to sell Wado Ichimonji.

"This sword is not for sale." Zoro stated, turning a cold, forbidding look upon the man, who paled and quickly backtracked, "I'm only here to find the curse that's been singing to me since I arrived."

"What?"

Zoro paid the man no mind, instead honing in on the song ringing in his soul.

Ah… This sword… How delightfully _bloodthirsty!_

"Oh! That's Sandai Kitetsu!!" A woman's voice exclaimed from behind him, rattling off facts about the sword he held in his hands. 

"Oh, I can't sell that sword! It's cursed!"

"I like it; it reminds me of myself." Zoro remarked, unsheathing an inch of steel to look closer.

It _sang_ to him, whispering such sweet nothings.

 _'Blood death destruction terror kill them let me bathe in their blood it would be so easy just a couple cuts and we'd be unstoppable,'_ The cursed sword whispered seductively, and Zoro smiled, stroking the exposed steel with his fingers.

"You're beautiful." He crooned softly, before grinning wildly, "Shall we test my luck against your curse, beautiful?" He asked, unsheathing the sword entirely. 

Ignoring the protests of the onlookers, Zoro flipped the sword up into the air and held his arm out beneath it. The blade flipped through the air, and Zoro heard it _purr_ as it chose to slide its reverse edge against his arm like a lover's kiss, burying itself almost to the hilt in the floor instead of taking his arm off.

Zoro smiled, and the onlookers stared at him in shock and awe. 

"I'll take it." He announced to the shopkeeper, who not only agreed to let him have Sandai Kitetsu for free, he gave him _another_ Grade sword, Yubashiri.

Two swords for the price of nothing at all! How lucky!

Zoro stroked his fingers over the cursed sword's hilt, feeling it purr in the back of his mind.

He rather felt like purring, himself.

He never noticed that he was humming along to the tune in his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ended up kinda folding another AU of mine into this one: The Zoro-is-Kuina AU! Figured it added yet more ripples to the pond of mysteries that is Zoro's identity! Is this getting needlessly complex? Yeah, absolutely. Can I stop myself? Absolutely Not! =D


	9. Start of the Line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The start of the greatest adventure of their lives.

Reverse Mountain was fucking  _ fun! _ The sheer  _ exhilaration _ of the death-defying rush up the mountain and then the breathtaking beauty of seeing the top of the world, the spray of waves freezing in the air and glittering like crystals. It was incredible. Zoro had never seen anything like it, and, for just a second… His mind fell silent.

And then they began the descent, and he whooped and cackled in delight alongside his captain as they risked death while racing down a mountain, relishing in the terror he and his nakama felt.

He heard a wail of utter despair from up ahead, and shivered in delighted anticipation, smile somehow growing even wider.

"Is that a mountain?"

"It's alive!" Zoro exclaimed, feeling the soul in the gigantic being before him, "I've never seen a living creature that big before!"

It filled him with an almost childish sense of wonder, even as the darker parts of him purred at the twisted, despair-born desires of the creature. Such intense loneliness and suffering… Ah… Bliss~.

Luffy picked a fight with the whale, and the entire ship was swallowed whole.

"I've never been eaten before." Zoro noted amidst the panicking of his nakama, tilting his head to one side as he thought, arms crossed over his chest, "If this is all there is to it, then I'm not impressed."

"We're deeeeaaaaaadddddd!!!" Usopp and Nami wailed. 

"Calm down, we're not dead." Zoro said, shooting them a mildly annoyed look.

"How do you know?! We got eaten and now we're in a tropical paradise!!" Usopp exclaimed, rushing over to grab Zoro by the front of his shirt and shake him.

Zoro regarded him impassively.

"Because I can't enter Heaven and this  _ definitely _ isn't Hell." He said simply, "So we can't be dead."

"Oh! Then we're just dreaming!" Nami said joyfully with a sigh of relief. 

"We are? Oh good, what a relief!" Usopp chimed in, also sighing in relief. 

"Wrong again." Zoro said bluntly, "We got eaten, but we're not dead. Also, something's coming."

A giant squid burst out of the water, setting off a renewed bout of screaming. They aimed the one cannon the ship had at it… but it got pierced by a harpoon.

Leading to a truly stupid series of events in which they met a lighthouse keeper named Crocus (who'd looked at Zoro oddly, with something almost like worry, as though he had an idea of what Zoro was), learned the whale's name was Laboon, and a couple of idiots fell from the painted ceiling along with  _ their _ idiot, Luffy.

And apparently regular compasses don't work in the Grand Line. Zoro always knew those things were bullshit; they  _ never _ led him where he wanted to go.

Oh, and they ended up picking up a couple new weirdos.

"I am Mr. 9, and this is my associate, Miss Wednesday." The man in the tacky crown lied.

Well, whatever: The others could deal with them; Zoro was gonna take a nap.

\-----

After waking up, Zoro decided to play with the newcomers a bit.

"What did you two say your names were, again?" He asked, a thin, mirthless smile tilting his lips up as he eyed them not unlike a tiger might eye potential prey. "Sommel Nathaniel and Nefertari Vivi, was it?" He added, not waiting for them to respond, smile widening and showing off more teeth at their twin looks of abject  _ terror,  _ "And Carue?" He added, shooting a glance towards the duck, which freaked out even more at his statement.

"N-n-no! I'm Miss Wednesday and he's Mr. 9!" Vivi denied, frantically shaking her head and waving her hands.

"Oh?" Zoro asked, eyes crinkling slightly at the corners as they narrowed, his lips pulling back to display even more teeth, "How  _ familiar~. _ " He remarked, "Now where have I heard names like that before?" He mused to himself, eyeing them hungrily.

Nami sadly interrupted his fun with a fist to the back of his head, and he turned a glare on her for interrupting his fun, but let the topic drop for the time being.

He'd attempted to warn them all. If they hadn't caught it, that was hardly  _ his _ fault. 

He'd just have to keep an eye out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally a longer chapter, but I split it into two parts to keep chapter lengths a *bit* more consistent (hopefully).


	10. A Banquet of Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whiskey Peak is covered in graves; why not add a few more?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for: Graphic Depictions of Violence

They arrived at Whiskey Peak to cheers and adulation used as a cover for eager bloodlust and ill intentions. It made Zoro almost nostalgic.

Sadly, he didn't think he'd have the time to play for as long as he'd like to, but he'd enjoy whatever playtime he could take.

All the free food and alcohol they provided as part of the ruse  _ was _ nice, even if they started drugging it after seeing how much liquor he and Nami could guzzle down. It was honestly impressive to watch someone as tiny as her put away as much booze as she did. He supposed it was from her past desire to drink herself numb so her circumstances didn't hurt as much. He found it oddly pleasing that she no longer held that desire. 

For the sake of Nami's bets (and ensuring she didn't lose the chance to loot the place while he distracted them all, because he  _ knew _ the witch knew what was going on), Zoro feigned losing in the drinking contest they were having. He mildly regretted giving up the chance to drink more, but a bigger part of him whispered that it was important he do what he could to pay his debts. 

_ 'Honor and integrity must be maintained.' _ The same part of him that had made him turn to face Mihawk to be cut down by him said, softly but firmly, and Zoro agreed with it: Debts needed to be paid.

At any rate, after feigning unconsciousness, it was just a matter of time until the enemy thought they were  _ all _ asleep, and then…

Zoro slipped out, practically melding with the shadows and disappearing from sight. It was as easy as breathing.

**_'Time to play.'_ ** A calm, calculatedly malevolent voice intoned within his head, resonating, and Zoro smiled wickedly in anticipation of the fun to come.

"Time to play." Zoro repeated softly, like a benediction.

\-----

It was  _ pathetically _ easy to slaughter the members of Baroque Works, so he ended up toying with a few of them. Just a bit of minor maiming and mangling, in the most excruciating ways he could. Ahhhh… The screams were  _ exquisite… _

He stared coldly down at his current victim, enjoying the terror in his eyes as he frantically tried to scoot back and away from him. Zoro stepped forward and drove Kitetsu through the man's knee, drawing a screech of agony from him. Zoro shivered slightly in pleasure, eyes falling half-lidded as a satisfied smirk slid across his lips.

He contemplated slitting open his belly… but that would certainly be lethal, and Zoro's captain wouldn't like that much. So he simply pulled the sword out at a different angle from how it went in, and slammed Yubashiri's pommel into the man's head, savagely knocking him unconscious.

He turned to his next victims, who thought they were sneaking up on him. He smiled.

"Rather dangerous to sneak up on a man with swords." He said casually, shifting to dodge the bullets before darting forward and cutting them down. Blood splashed across his face; he darted his tongue out to taste it as he eyed a nervous-looking "Miss Wednesday."

"You're next, then?" He asked almost playfully, "Are you sure?" He continued, smiling wickedly at her as he approached with what looked to be a casual swagger, muscles loose. 

He could feel her uncertainty and fear, but it was firmed up with a determination to succeed that he couldn't help but respect, no matter how foolish it was.

He was about to attack her when his captain arrived and freaked out, giving her the chance to run off on her duck. He was honestly disappointed he'd lost the chance to taste her blood.

"Zoro!" His captain sounded angry and disappointed, and Zoro felt dreadful, in a way he somehow  _ couldn't _ enjoy. 

He lowered his weapons, tilting his head to one side as he regarded his captain.

"You knew what I was when you made the contract, Captain. Are you regretting your choice already?" Zoro asked, smirking to cover the odd aching in his chest.

Luffy glared at him seriously, arms crossed over his chest.

"Why, Zoro?" He asked.

"They're bounty hunters, Captain." Zoro answered simply.

"So you were protecting the crew?" Luffy asked, still deadly serious. 

"Yes." Zoro said, because it was true. The fact he also played with them and  _ thoroughly _ enjoyed doing so was secondary to his primary goal of protecting the crew.

Luffy's frown faded a little. 

"And they're not dead?" He asked. Zoro knew Luffy preferred leaving enemies alive - something about how living with their destroyed dreams was more painful than killing them. It was honestly delightfully malicious, and Zoro could and  _ did _ get behind that sort of reasoning.

"I very specifically left them alive, Captain." Zoro reported dutifully, because it was true:  _ Zoro _ had not killed any of them. This did not, however, mean all of them would survive the night.

It wasn't  _ Zoro's _ fault if they couldn't get treated fast enough for their wounds, now was it?

Zoro knew his captain was aware of this - Luffy was  _ simple, _ not  _ stupid, _ and the boy knew of Zoro's nature - but Luffy's expression still lightened like the sun peeking through the clouds, smile not unlike the rising dawn. It made Zoro smile back and feel almost as soft as a feather, his chest  _ aching _ with fondness. How  _ devious _ of his captain to put this weakness inside of Zoro! His respect for the boy only grew as a result.

Luffy's smile at him widened further. 

"That's okay, then!" He said with a laugh, back to being as carefree as always.

They were interrupted by more Baroque Works nonsense, and Luffy ran off to go fight one of them.

Mr. 8 - whose name was actually "Igaram" - interrupted, explaining the situation, and that Vivi was a princess who infiltrated Baroque Works in order to try and save her country. He begged Zoro to save the girl.

"Why should I?" He asked, bored.

"Yeah, honestly, why should we? What do  _ we _ get out of saving her?" Nami asked, finally announcing her presence. Zoro shifted his gaze towards her, but was hardly surprised she was present.

"I'm sure the King would be glad to reward you for saving his daughter-"

"Zoro, go save the princess!!" Nami ordered, berri signs in her eyes at the thought of the reward she'd -  _ they'd _ \- get upon safely returning the princess to her kingdom.

He stared at her with an almost  _ bored _ expression, head tilted slightly to the side as he considered her.

"You're not my captain." He stated blandly, arching one eyebrow, arms crossed over his chest.

She smiled oh-so-sweetly at him.

"You  _ owe _ me~~." She singsonged.

He smirked back.

"Except we've already broken even, between the money I returned to you, the bets I helped you win, and the distraction I provided that let you steal everything of value on this island." He replied.

"What?" She asked, stunned. She hadn't realized what he'd done, he supposed; that was fine: He was perfectly happy to enlighten her.

"I cannot get drunk." He told her simply, smiling coldly, then his expression lightened, "I'll still save the girl for you, but  _ you'll _ owe  _ me." _ He added with an almost mocking grin as he clapped her lightly on the shoulder and ran off to go save the princess.

Besides: The cook would be  _ furious _ that  _ Zoro _ was the one who saved a literal princess.

\-----

A stupid level of exposition and one blurted identity later, and Zoro knew what they were aiming for next: The warlord Crocodile. How interesting! 

Zoro grinned.

He couldn't wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Zoro fucks around, but only in the cruelest and bloodiest of senses.


	11. Scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scars on the back are a swordsman's shame.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible TW for: Mentions of past torture

It had started as a normal day on the ship. Zoro was still up through the night, working with his new swords to see what their temperaments were like, so as to make better use of them in the future.

Wado Ichimonji was, of course, as stable and familiar as his own limbs; an extension of himself. It resonated deeply with his soul and his blood. It had always been with him, for as long as he could remember. The one constant in his life and shattered memories.

Sandai Kitetsu was, by contrast, an absolute firebrand, full of anger and lust for blood. It was so _eager,_ and had so much _fervor!_ Zoro found himself absolutely charmed and delighted by the blade. It wasn't very sociable, and was a bit willful and difficult to fully control at times, but that merely made things more interesting, and Zoro knew it would come to faithfully serve him in time.

Yubashiri was a bit of an outlier; a calm, stabilizing presence between Wado Ichimonji and Sandai Kitetsu. It didn't particularly have any desires attached to it other than that it wished to be used well, and Zoro could respect that. It didn't resonate with him on the same level that the other two blades did, but it was soothing and cool to his senses, like water, and he adored it.

As the sun rose, so did Zoro's crewmates.

The cook was first; punctual at 5 AM, like always. He always seemed mildly surprised to see that Zoro was up earlier than him. Zoro would be offended, but he supposed he _did_ take an awful lot of naps during the day.

~~But that was simply because he didn't dream while surrounded by his lively nakama.~~

Zoro nodded to the cook, and chose to ignore him, focusing instead on getting Sandai Kitetsu to bow to his will. As much as he adored the sword's violent nature - it was _so_ cute! - Zoro had to make sure it knew that _he_ was the master in this relationship, not it.

The next ones up were Nami and Vivi, two hours after Sanji, followed by Usopp at 8, and Luffy, summoned by the smell of breakfast.

Zoro wasn't particularly interested in eating breakfast at this time, so he simply didn't leave his spot near the back of the ship.

As the sun rose higher, so, too, did the temperature. As much as Zoro liked to feel uncomfortable… It was getting a tad too warm, and, since he was relatively out of sight of the rest of the crew… He took off his shirt and continued on with his exercises without it.

"Oi, you missed breakfast, you shitty swordsman!" The cook spat out, having come looking for him to kick his ass, but he froze upon seeing Zoro's bare back, "O-oi. You…" He trailed off

Zoro looked back at him from over his shoulder.

"Eh?" He asked, rather annoyed at having been interrupted.

"Your back…" Sanji muttered, frowning slightly, gnawing on the butt of his cigarette.

Zoro frowned back.

"What about it?"

"It's all scarred up." Sanji said, looking uneasy, "Didn't you say scars on the back are a swordsman's shame?"

Zoro's expression fell flat. 

"They are." He said simply, tone as flat as his expression.

The cook fell silent, eyes tracing the scars all over Zoro's back. They were thick and knotted lines of discolored flesh, crisscrossing the entirety of the swordsman's back. Like someone had gone to town on him with a whip on multiple occasions, and then clawed him up, to boot. 

Marks of _torture._

"Who did that to you?" He asked, quietly furious.

A flurry of tiny spasms ran across Zoro's face, lips pulling downward and brow tightening in something that might've been anger.

"You will _never_ meet them." Zoro stated, tone going sharp and flinty, and his expression was fierce...but Sanji got the feeling that Zoro wasn't angry.

No, he got the feeling that Zoro was _scared,_ and the thought was like cold water dumped over his head. 

Sanji had _never_ seen Zoro show any sort of fear in the entire time he'd known him. Not outside of that weird freak out back on Cocoyashi, anyway. The man seemed to _revel_ in situations that terrified normal people, the _freak._ To see a man who Sanji had previously believed to be incapable of fear looking _afraid…_

What the hell had happened to him?

Sanji shifted from one foot to the other, taking a deep inhale from his cigarette and letting the cloud of smoke escape his mouth, using the nicotine to ground himself. He frowned pensively.

"And...what if I meet 'em anyway?" He asked, not because he _wanted_ to, but because he just. Had to know.

Zoro's eyes went wider, gaze going distant. There was a very faint tremor in his hands, as they held his swords, his knuckles going bone white as his grip tightened.

There was a long moment of silence. So long that Sanji almost thought that the swordsman wasn't going to answer him.

Just as he was about to give up on getting an answer, Zoro finally spoke.

"Pray." He said, voice grim, "And hope that God is listening."

Sanji almost thought he heard some sort of tune on the wind as it suddenly blew, oddly cold for such a warm and sunny day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally gonna be Little Garden...but there's nothing for me to do with Little Garden. It's literally exactly the same, so you get this, instead! =D


	12. You WILL Live

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are a number of perks that come with having a demonic crewmate.

As they set off from Little Garden, the witch collapsed. She then got up, and tried to insist that she was fine.

Zoro watched her with the sort of disinterested interest one might regard an ant with.

"Oi witch! Can I have your soul when you die?" He asked bluntly, causing the cook and most of the others to whirl on him with glares.

 **_"DON'T ASK SHITTY QUESTIONS LIKE THAT YOU CREEPY MARIMO BASTARD!!!"_ ** The cook roared, storming over to kick Zoro, who casually blocked with one of his swords.

"Why not? She's dying." He stated just as bluntly.

Everyone looked stricken and furious, and Sanji continued to attempt to murder him.

**_"YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!"_ **

"Oi, Zoro." Luffy interrupted, voice serious, "Is that true?"

Sanji paused in attempting to beat the stupid out of Zoro to stare at his captain in betrayal.

Zoro turned his impassive gaze towards Luffy.

"Wouldn't say it if it wasn't, Captain." He said with a small nod. He had to admit he didn't particularly care for _lying_ to distress others; the truth worked so much better. It's just a shame he has to do this to his _nakama._

Luffy's frown deepened. Zoro knew his captain believed him; his captain knew more than most people thought.

"But… How can you _know?"_ Vivi asked, looking close to tears. 

Zoro's eyes turned to her, and he tilted his head slightly to the left.

"Her soul's coming loose from her body." He said simply, turning his attention back to Nami, "Can I have it?" He asked her again, something _almost_ desperate there. She wasn't _quite_ twisted enough to be Hellbound, but if Zoro owned her soul, then maybe, _maybe_ he'd be able to do something.

"No, you can't, 'cause I'm not dying!" Nami snarled, glaring as fiercely at Zoro as she could, which admittedly wasn't very, since she was, y'know, _dying,_ "Stop being such a creepy bastard for once in your life!!"

Zoro frowned faintly. That made things… A bit awkward.

"Zoro." Luffy started, drawing his attention, "Can you fix her?"

"I _might_ be able to?" He said, frowning in frustration, because he wasn't _sure,_ "But only if she made a contract with me, and I can't take a contract that'd conflict with yours, Captain." Such a thing would literally rip Zoro's soul apart, and not in a fun way.

"Wait, hold up. Why, exactly, are you asking if the shit swordsman can cure Nami-san?" Sanji asked, frowning at Luffy.

"Oh, 'cause Zoro's a demon." Luffy answered simply, as though there was nothing at all questionable about his statement.

"Okay, I know he gets called the "Demon of the East Blue," and yeah, he's creepy as all get out, but he can't possibly be an _actual_ demon. That's just stupid." Nami interjected, looking skeptical.

Zoro turned to her with eyes like the abyss, smile just a touch too wide to be human.

She paled.

"Okay… Nevermind, he's _definitely_ the devil. Ahahahaha..." She said, laughing nervously.

Usopp shrieked and held out a cross in Zoro's direction with a shaking hand.

Zoro stared at him boredly, merely arching an eyebrow.

"Really?" He asked, utterly unimpressed. He reached out and casually took the cross from Usopp and turned it upside down before handing it back.

Usopp dropped the cross, staring at Zoro as though he'd just told him the world was ending and everything he'd ever thought he knew was wrong.

"Um, excuse me, but," Vivi began, a bit hesitant, "Can't Luffy-san just let go of his contract to let Nami make a contract with you, and then they switch back?"

"He _could_ let go of the contract with me..." Zoro agreed with a nod, "But then I'd have to kill him."

 **"WHAT?!"** Was the general - and very _loud_ \- consensus.

Zoro frowned at them.

"The contract runs until Luffy either dies or breaks the deal, and if he breaks the deal, he dies. Ending the contract breaks the deal. So he'd die." He said, tone clearly questioning their intelligence, because this information should've been obvious. It's not like it hadn't _just_ been stated that he was a fucking _DEMON,_ after all!

They stared at him in horror while Luffy watched calmly. This wasn't news to Luffy.

"Well… What if- what if Luffy ordered you to? You have to do _anything_ he orders you to, right??" Usopp asked desperately.

Zoro considered it. He _was_ bound to do as Luffy ordered, but-

The music grew deafening, and he grimaced, one hand rising to cradle his suddenly fiercely throbbing temples. It was like everything inside of himself had just screamed **"NO."**

"I can't." Zoro said, shaking his head, deeply frustrated at his own inability to act.

"Why?" Sanji demanded.

"Or rather, I can't _cure_ her...but I _can_ keep her alive." Zoro elaborated, ignoring Sanji's question, "Won't be pleasant for her, though."

"What does that mean?"

"Means she'll live, but since I can't heal or cure her… She'll suffer all the pain of her body failing on her." Zoro answered with a shrug, "But it'd buy us more time to get her to a doctor, so I guess it's up to Nami and the captain whether it's worth it or not." He continued, leaning back against the wall with his hands behind his head, closing his eyes.

"Would it buy us time to reach Alabasta?" Nami asked after a pause during which she gnawed anxiously on her lower lip.

"Yeah, though I doubt you'd be able to navigate us anywhere." Zoro answered simply, "Given you'd be in agony the entire time."

Nami frowned as she considered it.

"If it'll get us to Alabasta faster… I'm okay with that." Nami admitted.

Zoro smirked at her, knowing _exactly_ why she was so determined to fulfill Vivi's wishes. Love caused mortals to make all _manner_ of foolish decisions.

~~He knew that all too well.~~

"Okay." Luffy agreed with a nod, "Zoro: Keep Nami alive until we find a way to cure her. Captain's Orders." He ordered.

Zoro felt the chains binding him to Luffy stretch taut, spiritual hooks digging into every fiber of his twisted being with a _delicious_ level of yanking on the frayed threads of his soul. He couldn't quite suppress the hum of pleasure that escaped him as he rose to do his captain's bidding, his eyes half-lidded.

He opened his pitch black eyes back up to look Luffy in his, and smiled, wide and sharp and cold.

 **"Thy will be done."** He purred, almost gliding over to where Nami was bundled in the bed, movements unnaturally graceful and smooth. He reached out a hand to her, looking down at her. 

He tilted his head to one side. 

**"Try not to scream too early; it'd be such a waste."** He said idly, right before grabbing her head and letting the dark power within him pour into her, wrapping around her soul and binding it to her body.

She screamed.

He released her, but a good chunk of his power remained behind within her, keeping her tied to the mortal plane. It prickled uncomfortably at him to use such a skill on someone he wasn't contracted to, but it was still a pleasant sort of discomfort.

"It's done." He announced, heading back to the spot he'd picked out to keep vigil from with a jaw-popping yawn. He settled back as though to nap.

The others watched him go with varying levels of wariness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now you've all learned one of the perks associated with being contracted with a demon! So long as you remain within the bounds of the deal... You're essentially immortal! After all, Hellraiser: Bloodline showed that someone who's bound a demon to their will can live for like. 200+ years without any signs of aging or infirmity! That's Hellraiser canon!


	13. A Cure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro plays in the snow while Nami gets a cure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for: Graphic Description of an Injury

It was cold on this "Drum Island". Snowy.

The cold, grey sky almost jogged something in the furthest reaches of Zoro's mind… But it fell just short of doing anything but giving him an odd feeling of nostalgia and longing for better times...

He stayed to watch the ship with Carue while the rest of the crew went onto the island to try and find a doctor for the witch.

He contemplated the icy water, then dove in. He wanted to know if it was the cold that was making him nostalgic or something else.

The ice water was cold enough to shock his system, driving the air from his lungs. It was so cold and so shocking that it  _ hurt,  _ and he  _ reveled  _ in it. He floated down there for a while, letting the currents carry him. It was… peaceful. Quiet.

The music was quieter than usual, but seemed to echo in the silence. 

He resurfaced, and looked around. He was near land, and… He couldn't see the ship anymore.

He hated when things moved around on him, and it  _ always happened. _

Scowling, Zoro set off in a random direction, only to be caught in an avalanche, which was deeply painful on multiple levels, and Zoro had a blast. He was pretty sure he felt a few things crack!

He emerged from the snow, and kept walking. It really hurt to walk, and his leg didn't support his weight very well, and moved a bit oddly, but he was sure it was fine. He glanced down at it.

His foot was still pointing in the right direction, so it was  _ totally _ fine!

He came across Usopp and Vivi, and they screeched upon sight of him.

_ "AHHHHHHHHHH ZORO!!! YOUR  _ **_LEG!!!!"_ ** Usopp wailed, clutching his head.

"What about it?"

_ "WHAT ABOU-  _ The  **BONE** is  **_STICKING OUT OF IT!!!"_ ** Usopp screeched, smacking Zoro on the head as hard as he could.

"You're a little young to be flirting with me like this." Zoro said, rubbing his head and frowning at the conflicting feelings in him.

Usopp choked on nothing, eyes nearly bugging out of his head.

**_"I'M NOT FLIRTING WITH YOU!!! I'M CALLING YOU AN IDIOT FOR WALKING ON A BROKEN LEG!!"_ **

"It's fine! The pain's invigorating!" Zoro dismissed with a wave of his hand.

"M-Mr. Bushido… Like Usopp said, the bone of your leg is poking out of your body! That's not good! We need to get you to a doctor immediately!!" Vivi interrupted, staring in wide eyed horror at Zoro's leg.

Zoro sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Alright,  _ fine! _ I'll deal with my leg."

And with that, he plopped down on the ground, grabbed hold of both ends of the break, and forced the bone back into alignment, groaning ecstatically and grinning at the agony that unleashed within him. He shifted the two ends of his bone against each other a few times until they lined up properly, ignoring the dark blood sluggishly spilling over his hands.

With the bones finally aligned, he stood back up, lifting one of his hands to his mouth to lick the blood off of his fingers.

Usopp and Vivi looked  _ very _ green, when he glanced over at them.

"What?" He asked, a bit annoyed, "I took care of it, didn't I?"

"You're insane." Usopp whimpered at the same time Vivi pitifully asked:  _ "How? _ How could you do that? Didn't that hurt?"

"'Course it hurt." Zoro said, frowning at her, then smiled at the memory of the anguish he'd felt, "It hurt  _ so much." _ He sighed blissfully.

Vivi looked horrified, but Usopp just pulled a disgusted look and then shook his head, waving it off.

"Yeah, he's fine." Usopp sighed, facepalming as he shook his head.

"But he-"

Zoro turned abruptly to face toward the mountains.

"Oi. Where'd the others go?" He asked, frowning.

"Luffy and Sanji went to go take Nami to the top of the middle mountain to find the doctor -  _ but she's not there right now!" _ Usopp explained, remembering abruptly what they were out there to do and looking to go rushing off.

"Huh." Zoro said, frown deepening.

"What's wrong, Mr. Bushido?" Vivi asked, finally starting to calm down, worry for Zoro replaced by more determined worry for Nami

"Nothing, for now." He said, turning away and following the other two.

His stride was already back to normal.

\-----

After thrashing Wapol's men - quite a disappointing fight, honestly; not a single one of them was any kind of challenge - Zoro's head again snapped over to stare in the direction of the middle mountain. He felt something tugging at him, but wasn't able to figure out what.

He needed to go in that direction, though. Luffy was there, with Nami. The pull on his power was stronger, and he frowned. What on earth was his idiot captain doing?

Something tugged at him,  _ hard, _ but he couldn't figure out how to do what he was being tugged to do. It nagged at the back of his mind, so close he could almost  _ taste _ it…

But nothing came when he reached for it.

He frowned up at the tallest mountain, worried, despite himself.

\-----

When Nami woke up, she was surprised by how little pain she was in. Even while unconscious, she could almost swear that she'd still felt the white hot agony of her body slowly shutting down due to her fever mixed with the so-cold-it- **_burned_ ** feeling of Zoro's demonic magic winding through every fiber of her being and refusing to let her die. Even now, she felt the echo of that soul searing  **_COLD,_ ** and she shivered, clutching the covers closer to herself.

But it was nothing compared to the almost  _ dirty _ feeling the magic had left behind, now that it had been withdrawn. She felt...  _ tainted,  _ somehow. Like an awful taste had been left behind in the back of her mouth, along with something akin to a horrible smell in the back of her nose. Like blood, and rotting flesh, and brimstone all mixed together, but in her  _ soul. _

"You contracted Kestia." An old woman told her bluntly, "An ancient disease that causes a very high fever. I'd thought it was eradicated; what were you doing? Wandering around an ancient island without a shirt?" She asked almost sarcastically.

Nami flushed slightly, because, even though it had been mostly against her will...that had been  _ exactly _ what had happened.

"Now, I don't know what sort of dark power you dealt with to keep you alive," The woman continued, far more seriously, making Nami freeze, eyes going wide, "But Kestia kills in five days, and you arrived here past that deadline. By all rights, girl, you should be dead right now."

"I-" Nami began.

"-Stop. I don't want to know." The woman stated, holding up a hand, "If you're making contracts with dark powers, that's your business and I want no part in it."

Nami supposed that was fair; she hadn't particularly wanted to know about Zoro, either. Still… She owed him one, and she knew it.

She just hoped he wouldn't demand anything awful of her…

Somehow, she didn't think he would, though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh *Zoro*... Will you never cease to horrify your crewmates with your cavalier lack of regard for serious injuries? akdlsfjkl;fsd


	14. Settling In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chopper's not sure about all the members of his new crew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: People bathing together and some proof that Zoro's a walking, talking corpse

Chopper was _terrified_ of the green-haired creature that smelled like steel, blood, pain, and death. He didn't understand how the others couldn't tell how _WRONG_ The Thing was. It wasn't human.

He was _certain_ that he was going to die when he was assigned bathtime with Luffy and The Thing That Smelled Like Death, but Luffy just laughed and carried him along, despite his protests, The Thing walking calmly alongside their smiling captain.

Chopper squeaked when The Thing glanced at him, and breathed a sigh of relief when it looked away again. 

He was mostly left to his own devices during the bath, though Luffy helped him wash his back.

And then Luffy turned to The Thing with a grin.

"Wanna help me get clean, Zoro?" He asked cheerfully, drawing a hum from The Thing as it shifted closer to Luffy, much to Chopper's dread.

And yet... all that happened was that The Thing The Others Called Zoro almost _tenderly_ took one of Luffy's hands and began looking it over, scrubbing over the remaining injuries there with a patient gentleness Chopper would've never expected from an obvious Predator like The Thing.

That gentle, patient care continued as The Thing cleaned Luffy's arm and then switched to his other hand, giving it the same careful attention as he had the first, eyes scanning intently for any remaining injuries. He washed Luffy's back with the same almost tender care.

"I'm okay, Zoro." Luffy assured The Thing, smiling warmly at it.

"I know, Captain." The Thing answered, voice soft, calm, and steady. There was a surprising warmth in it, Chopper noted, "But you never wash yourself properly." It added, softly chiding as it scrubbed behind Luffy's ears with the washcloth in its hand.

"Shishishishi! But I've got Zoro here to help me!" Luffy said with a bright grin up at his swordsman, perfectly at ease where he sat between The Thing's legs, back pressed against The Thing's chest and head resting against The Thing's throat.

The Thing scoffed, but didn't look or smell even mildly annoyed.

"What _would_ you do without me, Captain?" It asked, lips quirking slightly and expression soft and fond as it looked down at Luffy.

"Not be clean." Was the immediate, shameless response, which got a snort and a soft laugh.

Chopper's fear faded a great deal at that; The Thing looked and sounded _human_ when it laughed. Maybe… Maybe it was safe…? Luffy sure seemed to think so.

"Yeah, I guess that's true." The Thing - no, _Zoro_ \- replied, wrapping an arm around Luffy and leaning its - _his_ \- head atop Luffy's, eyes going half-lidded, a faint, contented smile still playing on his lips.

"Zoro… You're not human, right?" Chopper asked, very timidly.

Zoro glanced over, and Chopper had to fight off his instinctive desire to flinch and hide at being the sole focus of a Deadly Predator. The being seemed to consider Chopper's question, humming softly in thought.

"I used to be, I think." He answered after a few moments of thought, "But not anymore."

"I see…" Chopper murmured, "I'll- I'll have to give you a checkup, then!" He decided, trying to be brave, "Because if you're not human then- then I'm gonna have to learn what your baseline vitals are, so I can tell when something's wrong!"

That small, fond smile reappeared on Zoro's face.

"Alright." He agreed easily.

"And- and I'm gonna give one to everyone else, too!" Chopper continued, frowning determinedly, "Because I need to know all of your medical histories, and what to expect from your bodies!"

"You're a very good doctor, aren't you?" Zoro asked, still smiling faintly, "I can tell our crew's in good hooves."

"Shut up you bastard~! Your compliments don't make me happy, y'know~~!" Chopper exclaimed, wiggling gleefully.

Luffy giggled while Zoro blinked at him, amused.

Chopper decided… Zoro wasn't so bad after all.

Yes, he was _definitely_ an Apex Predator, and _Very, Very Dangerous,_ but. They were all Pack to him. It was like wolves, Chopper thought: Luffy was the alpha male, and Zoro was the other alpha - the one who defended the den, pups, and weaker members of the pack while the alpha male dealt with the main threats. He was definitely _very_ scary, but he followed Luffy as loyally as the rest of them, so he wasn't _actually_ scary, Chopper decided. Not to him or the rest of the pack, at least.

\-----

This lasted up until he actually started giving Zoro that checkup. He'd taken care of the checkups on all the other members of the crew, testing baseline vitals like heart rate, blood pressure, breathing, reflexes, height, and weight, and taking a few blood samples to check over for stuff like cholesterol and hormone levels: It was _always_ good to keep an eye on all aspects of health, Chopper knew.

And then he got Zoro to sit down for those tests, and while his height and weight were taken just fine (5'11 3/4" and 187 lbs, respectively), after that, things got… _Weird._

He put his stethoscope to Zoro's chest, and…

 _"ZOROOOOO!!! YOUR HEART'S NOT BEATING!!!!"_ Chopper wailed, eyes nearly bugging out of his head as he panicked, drawing the rest of the crew's attention.

"...Yeah?" Zoro asked, looking confused.

_**"HOW ARE YOU ALIVE?!"** _

"I'm not."

 _That_ made everyone freeze and stare at him in something akin to horror, loud exclamations of disbelief escaping them.

Zoro frowned and looked around at them all.

"Did you all forget that I'm a _demon?_ That means I went to Hell and _died."_ He said, sounding a bit annoyed, "Why's it surprising I don't have a heartbeat?"

Everyone looked pained at the reminder that Zoro was not, in fact, human.

In all honesty… They'd never really put much thought into _how_ Zoro became a demon. Learning that he'd _died_ and _gone to Hell_ was. A horrible thought. It hurt to think about the fact that their weird-but-mostly-benign swordsman had _DIED_ and gone to _HELL_.

"Don't you mean died and went to Hell?" Nami asked, the only one to catch the odd order in which he'd said that.

Zoro blinked at her, scratching his head.

"No, I definitely went to Hell _before_ I died." He stated with certainty, before looking confused about that certainty.

...That was even _worse!_

"How? Why?"

"I don't remember." He frowned deeply, looking vaguely distressed, so the topic was shelved for another time.

"Okay… Zoro has no heartbeat." Chopper noted down in his records, trying to get back on topic.

"I do sometimes." Zoro said suddenly.

"What? How??" Chopper asked, looking up with wide eyes.

"Dunno. Sometimes I just feel it start beating." The swordsman admitted, ruffling his own hair.

"Hm, interesting." Chopper hummed, "Make sure you tell me about any time that happens in the future, okay? Maybe we can figure out why that happens!"

"Sure." Zoro agreed easily, shrugging.

"Now, take some deep breaths for me…" Chopper instructed, pressing his stethoscope to Zoro's lungs.

Zoro did as instructed, and Chopper noted with some relief that his lungs sounded perfectly healthy.

"If Zoro doesn't have a heartbeat, does he need to breathe?" Usopp wondered out loud.

"Nah." Zoro answered simply, "I only breathe when I need to talk or when I'm smelling something."

That was. Rather upsetting to hear, if only because it made checking Zoro's vitals in an emergency nearly impossible, but Chopper couldn't deny that it made _sense_ that Zoro wouldn't need to breathe, given he was, well, _not technically alive._

Taking Zoro's temperature yielded similarly odd results. Namely that his baseline temperature was somewhere around room temperature, which, while making it far more difficult to tell when something was _wrong_ with him, did make sense, considering he was, well, _dead._

In the end, Chopper mostly just took a multitude of blood samples to check for everything he could possibly think of, a bit unnerved at how Zoro's blood was nearly _black_ in coloration.

But, well, Zoro wasn't really _that_ much weirder than a human made of rubber, so it was honestly just another day on the Strawhat crew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This turned out super sweet and soft, imo! I loved getting the chance to explore the queerplatonic nature of Zoro's and Luffy's relationship! They're so cute together!!


	15. First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It shouldn't really be a surprise that a demon knows how to make someone bend their morals in pursuit of their desires.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Sex, Rather Unhealthy Pining, Unhealthy Relationships
> 
> And so the rating has *FINALLY* been bumped up to "Explicit"! That's right! This chapter is officially ***18+ ONLY!!!*** The actual smut begins after the cut, so if you only want Zoro and Sanji flirt/fighting, you can stick to the first half!
> 
> Also, I use the term "dick" to describe Zoro's genital anatomy, even if he does not have what is thought of as a *conventional* dick.

It shouldn't really be a surprise to anyone, but, after spending long enough at sea, Sanji eventually _did_ take Zoro up on his offers, as Zoro always knew he would. It made Zoro's cold, dead heart twist up with something like joy.

The day had started with one of their usual fights: Zoro said something, and Sanji took offense. Sanji attacked.

Zoro blocked, grinning fiercely at the violence and bloodlust coming from the cook.

"Did I hit a nerve, Curly?" He asked tauntingly, "Do you want to… _Punish me?"_ He added in a far more lewd tone with a waggle of his eyebrows, running his tongue across his lips.

"You SICK FUCK!" Sanji snarled, causing Zoro to laugh as he was forced back by a particularly vicious kick to his gut.

"All this time, and you're _still_ such a _tease!"_ Zoro groaned, smiling flirtatiously, "When will you finally admit that you want to play, _Sanji?"_

The cook shuddered at hearing his name spoken by the demon, and Zoro knew it was in a mix of fear, revulsion, and _desire._ He could _feel_ the conflicting urges within the man's soul, so _very_ close to a boiling point, and it made him shiver in delicious anticipation. He wanted it _now,_ but he knew how to be patient.

The waiting was such _sweet_ agony~.

"I don't want to play any of your shitty games, Marimo." The cook sneered as they clashed once more, "You disgust me."

Zoro shuddered and sighed blissfully at the crumbling of his own heart as he took another swipe at Sanji, coming _just_ short of drawing blood. It would've connected if the cook hadn't ducked back just in time.

"Oh, you say the _sweetest_ nothings~." Zoro crooned throatily, eyes half-lidded as he blocked another kick that would shatter bones if it connected.

 **_"QUIT GETTING OFF ON THIS, YOU MOSS HEADED BASTARD!!!!!!"_ ** The cook roared, redoubling his assault.

 ** _"WILL YOU TWO STOP FLIRTING ALREADY?!"_** Nami screeched, interrupting them with a hard knock to both of their heads, sending them crashing to the ground.

Sanji bolted back upright, begging for Nami's forgiveness and stammering denials about his flirting with Zoro.

Zoro, for his part, simply gasped in delight, purposefully pressing on the forming bruise to draw out as much of the pain from it as he could before it healed.

"Oh, _Nami~!_ You wicked thing! I never knew you felt this way for me~!" He purred, smirking as he placed one hand over his cold, dead heart, batting his eyes up at her, "If you want me so badly, you should've just _told_ me! I'd be _more_ than happy to satisfy your desires~."

She slammed her fist into his head a second time, rolling her eyes and huffing.

"Zoro, we _both_ know that's never gonna happen, so cut the act." She said sharply, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Zoro pouted at her, but dropped the flirtatious act.

"You're no fun anymore, witch." He grumbled, heaving a very put-upon sigh as he crossed his arms over his chest, looking petulantly to the side.

"Good!" She chirped with a smile so sweet sugar wouldn't melt in her mouth, "Now stop using me to try and flirt with Sanji-kun and go help Usopp make repairs!"

Zoro sighed again but complied, heaving himself up and ambling over to where the sniper was hammering boards into place to patch a hole.

\-----(SMUT PAST THIS CUT)-----

That night, the warring desires within Sanji finally reached their tipping point, and the cook ordered Zoro to stick around to help him wash the dishes.

Zoro complied, body humming with anticipation and the first stirrings of arousal at the deliciously sexual desires he heard Sanji's soul whispering. They weren't _sinful,_ per se, but they were on the borderline, and it would be so, _so_ easy to make him fall. 

~~Zoro did not want to make him fall Zoro wanted to keep him safe and happy and light and free of the chains that wrapped around Zoro stranglingkillingrippinghissOUlaPArT~~

Sanji led him to the storeroom after they finished with the dishes, and Zoro's heart almost began to beat again beneath his breast. The cook locked the door after they entered.

"This means _nothing."_ The cook said firmly after roughly shoving him against a wall and kissing him almost hard enough to bruise, "This is just a quick fuck to take the edge off. Nothing more."

Zoro grinned against the cook's lips, even as his heart twisted in anguish, cracking and crumbling a little more.

"Good!" He said instead of voicing any of his pain, "Fucking me isn't a sin, but loving me would be."

~~_LovemelovemelovemepleaselovemeIwantyouIneedyouloveyousosomuchplease_ ** _please_ ** ~~

He viciously bit the cook's lower lip as they crashed together for another kiss, stopping _just_ shy of drawing blood.

"So you better not fall in love with me, cook." He finished, grinning wolfishly as he drew back just a little.

The cook scoffed in something almost like disgust.

"No worries there: I only love _ladies,_ and even for a _man_ you're too damn crude and brutish for me to have any interest in beyond using you and your disgusting, sweaty body to take the edge off." He sneered, "And even _that's_ just 'cause I know you'll let me, you freaky bastard."

Oh, how those words _hurt!_ They ripped Zoro's heart into even smaller pieces, and the agony was _exquisite!_ He wanted to _break_ this man. See his pale, flawless skin bruise and bleed beneath his touch; flawless beauty _tainted_ by his darkness. He wanted to throw him down and ride him 'til he blew _,_ and then keep going until he was _screaming_ in equal parts ecstasy and agony.

He wanted to be thrown down and **_fucked_ ** until he couldn't even remember his own name anymore. To be _brutalized_ and _used_ by this man, with all that coiled, concealed strength being used to ram into him and leave even more marks upon his body. To rake his nails down that pale, flawless back and make him _bleed._

~~_IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloVeyOU_ ~~

"Any rules?" He asked instead of voicing any of that, still grinning wickedly.

"Keep your mouth shut and let me pretend you're literally anyone else." The cook said, loosening his tie and setting it aside before carefully unbuttoning his suit jacket, folding it, and setting that aside as well before beginning to do the same with his shirt.

"I can do that." Zoro agreed, carefully setting his swords aside before stripping off his shirt and carelessly tossing it aside so it landed near his swords, "So long as you can handle a few bruises and bites."

"Nothing anywhere anyone else can see." Was the cook's immediate response, coupled with a pointed glare.

 _"Obviously."_ Zoro snarked with a roll of his eyes.

The cook nodded firmly with a sharp "Hmph."

"And. _I'm_ topping." The cook stated in a tone that allowed for no argument.

Zoro shot him a salacious smirk, looking at him through his lashes.

"Was there ever any doubt?" He purred darkly, "The only question is whether you're gonna be pinning me down and fucking me senseless or if I'm gonna be riding you 'til you scream."

A deliciously dark blush stole across the cook's pale face at Zoro's bluntness, and he let out a cough to try and hide his embarrassment.

While the cook figured that out, Zoro shimmied out of his haramaki and tossed it aside to land near his shirt.

"...I'm gonna fuck you." The cook finally decided, carefully folding up his shirt and setting it aside.

"Alright, how d'you want me? Face to face or on my hands and knees?" Zoro asked, untying his boots and tossing them aside. He never bothered wearing socks.

"On your hands and knees, so I don't have to look at your face." The cook said.

Zoro smirked as he slid off his pants, and the cook looked startled when he glanced up to look at him, a soft, choked sound escaped him.

"You- you don't have a-"

"-Dick?" Zoro asked, arching an eyebrow and smirking in amusement, "No shit."

"You're-"

"- _Not_ a woman." Zoro interrupted again, voice stern, his lustful smirk disappearing in favor of an intense Stare.

The cook swallowed thickly, and nodded.

"Right. _Obviously."_ He said, already recovering from the shock, "Just surprised to learn that you dye your mossy hair."

Zoro snorted at the cook, tossing his pants aside and pointedly stretching, pretending not to notice the way the cook closely watched his muscles move. Zoro could _feel_ the lustful desire sparking within the cook's soul, and it made the space between his legs tingle with _want_. He didn't get wet; not anymore, at least. Not since he'd died and had his hormones shifted to reflect his masculinity... but honestly, the pain was part of the pleasure.

~~The only "good" part of having gone to Hell was that he finally got the body he wanted.~~

Zoro smirked at the cook from where he lounged on the floor, legs spread and putting _everything_ on display.

The cook gulped once more as his eyes flicked over Zoro's bared body, and Zoro could see his cock twitch through those thin suit pants. He looked almost _painfully_ hard; he really _had_ waited until his desires boiled over, hadn't he? The poor, repressed thing~.

Good thing Zoro was here to take care of him, eh?

With a dark chuckle, Zoro slid forward onto all fours and over to the cook, grasping his hips with a nearly bruising grip and looking him dead in the eyes as he slid his tongue over the outline of that hard dick, getting a gasped curse from the man and a hand dropping down to tangle in his hair.

"You want me to play with you first, cook?" He asked, voice breathy, "I could make you _scream."_

"You're _that_ desperate to suck my cock?" The cook panted, pulling hard on Zoro's hair and getting a very soft groan.

"Oh, _yes,"_ Zoro purred, running his tongue along the outline of the cook's dick once more.

"Fine then."

Zoro grinned and opened the cook's belt with his hands before using his _teeth_ to undo the button and pull down the zipper, exposing the black silk boxers the cook wore, already damp with a bit of pre.

Zoro lapped at the damp spot and suppressed a hum of pleasure at the taste. He wanted more.

~~This was everything he'd ever wanted~~

He took the hem of the boxers in his teeth and pulled them down, using his hands to drop them the rest of the way, exposing that marvelous, flushed-red dick, which he immediately grabbed in one hand and roughly stroked a couple times, thumbing the slit and getting more curses from the cook.

He swirled his tongue around the head and then wrapped his lips around and swallowed down to the root, until his nose was buried in the cook's pubes while the man cursed loudly and yanked hard on his hair, nearly yanking several strands out, hands scrabbling at him. 

Zoro couldn't help the moan that escaped him at the feeling. He let his teeth scrape lightly against the sensitive flesh as he pulled back to lap at the slit, looking at the cook's blown-wide pupils and the expression of naked _want_ on the man's face.

"Holy fuck, you are _such_ a whore, oh FUCK! _Fuckfuck_ **_FUCK!"_ ** The cook moaned, head falling back as Zoro took him down again, swirling his tongue. The cook's hips bucked up into Zoro's throat, but that was fine - Zoro enjoyed a good face fucking.

"Stopstopstop _wait!"_ The cook gasped out, pulling sharply on Zoro's hair.

Zoro pulled off with as lewd and wet a "pop!" as he could manage, licking his lips and meeting the cook's hungry eyes through his lashes, smiling coyly, knowing what a sight he must be with his lips red and swollen, his cheeks flushed, and a bit of drool running down his chin from having a big, thick cock down his throat, his eyes almost pitch black with desire.

He hummed in question, purposefully keeping his breathing going just to watch the cook _quiver_ each time a cool breath hit his dick.

"I'll fuck your dumb face some other day, Marimo. For now, get on your hands and knees." 

Oh _fuck. YES._

Zoro suppressed a groan, remembering the cook's words from earlier, and did as instructed, spreading his legs a bit and leaning forward onto his forearms, back bowing in a way he _knew_ was enticing.

The cook's fingers dug into his hips and the man pressed his dick against Zoro's entrance and pushed in with a groan.

 _"Fuuuuuuckkk_ you fit me like a _glove…!"_ He groaned, bottoming out in Zoro and leaning down atop his back to rest for a moment.

Zoro bowed his head and said nothing; the cook wanted him to be silent, now that they were actually getting to the main act, so he'd be silent.

After he recovered just a bit, Sanji began a frankly _brutal_ pace, and Zoro **_loved it._ ** He fought not to moan in bliss at the pain and pleasure that mixed so perfectly together as the cook viciously fucked him, digging his fingers into Zoro's hips hard enough to bruise, and biting his shoulders hard enough he'd _definitely_ leave marks behind, muttering curses and filthy praises into Zoro's ear.

 _It was everything he'd ever wanted._ The only thing that could make it better is if the cook loved him, but he knew that would never happen, and that was okay. It was okay! The cook _wanted_ him, and that was enough. It was enough.

_Honest._

~~If he couldn't have love, then desire would do.~~

"Shit, _fuck!_ Can you get pregnant?" Sanji asked after abruptly stopping, sharply slapping him on the side with one hand when Zoro didn't answer, "Oi! _Answer_ me, Marimo."

"I'm _dead,_ dumbass." Zoro panted out, voice rough and throaty. He wanted nothing more than to just roll his hips back against the cook's cock until they both came, but he understood that this was _Important_ to the cook, "Even if my hormones _weren't_ all wrong for getting knocked up, no life could take root inside me 'cause I'm _dead_ . So just _fuck me._ " He demanded, pointedly rolling his hips back against the cook and dragging a ragged moan from the man.

"Okay. Alright." Sanji muttered, "Just wanted to make sure no accidents could come from this." He added, starting to move again.

Zoro shifted one hand down to rub, pull, and pinch at himself, suppressing the urge to moan.

"If anything took root in my womb I'd tear it out of my gut, myself, so just cum inside me, you curly bastard." He groaned lowly.

"Fuck. **_Fuck!"_ ** The cook apparently _really liked the idea of cumming in him,_ given his rhythm quickly started falling apart as he began just _rutting_ into Zoro, clawing at the man's sides and thighs as he slammed in as hard and fast as he could, chasing his rapidly approaching release.

Zoro was close, too. 

**_So close._ **

He rubbed faster. Harder, unable to keep himself from audibly gasping for breath as he got close, toes beginning to curl.

With a growled curse, Sanji slammed in one final time, and Zoro could feel him spilling hot and wet into his body, thrusting lazily through his climax to milk every last drop of pleasure from the encounter.

Zoro twisted his hand sharply upon his own dick and came with a shudder and a strangled gasp, clamping down around the cook and drawing another deep, oozing moan from the man.

Sanji's forehead rested against Zoro's shoulder blades as he panted for breath while coming down from his orgasm.

Once he'd finished catching his breath, he slowly pulled out. He grabbed his jacket and got a cigarette, then lit it with a match and took a drag. He then began moving to get dressed and head out, intending to act like this little tryst had never happened.

Zoro simply rolled over to watch him dress through half-lidded eyes, making no move to get dressed, himself. 

The cook finished dressing and headed to the door. 

He paused just before opening it, straightening his tie.

"This meant nothing." He repeated, voice cold, "First chance I get, I'll be seeking out a lovely lady to spend the night with, instead of settling for _you."_

The words hurt. Significantly.

~~_Why won't you love me?_ ~~

It was the sweetest, cruelest form of torture Zoro had ever experienced.

Outwardly, he simply smirked, leaning back against the wall of the hold, hands behind his head and legs spread in a pointedly indecent manner.

"That suits me just fine, swirly brow." He said, idly reaching down to scratch his belly, "'Cause while you do that, I'll be seeking out some company of my own to play with." His grin turned distinctly wicked and predatory.

The cook shivered ever-so-slightly at the ominous nature of Zoro's words, but then simply harrumphed and stalked out the door without a single glance back.

Zoro's smirk softened as he watched the cook go, though it remained distinctly smug and satisfied.

He knew this wasn't gonna be just a one time thing.

The cook would be back.

It was just a matter of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please do not seek to emulate the relationship that Zoro and Sanji have, because holy HELL it is SO FUCKING UNHEALTHY.


	16. Small

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro doesn't understand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Self-Loathing internal monologue

After reaching Alabasta, they met a man who felt like fire. He was _very_ pretty, and Zoro quite wanted to play with him, but he was Luffy's older brother, so Zoro would keep his hands to himself.

The man, Ace - _'Portgas D. Ace!'_ One part of the man's soul insisted, trying to overpower the part that hatefully hissed _'Gol D. Ace'_ \- was polite, and remarkably responsible, in comparison to Luffy. Though, he was a bit… _Twitchy_ around Zoro, and Zoro could feel the conflicted desires there.

Later on, after most of the crew went to bed and it was just Ace and Luffy visibly awake in the little camp they'd set up amidst some rocks, Ace spoke up.

"Luffy… Are you _sure_ about him?" The fire man asked, and Zoro could feel all the concerned and protective desires to "deal with" him as his captain's brother's eyes glanced over at where he was lounging against a decently-sized rock, head bowed and arms around his swords, which were held in front of him.

Zoro continued to feign sleep, to give the brothers the illusion of privacy.

He felt his captain's gaze come to rest on him, as well, before returning to his brother, desires as clear and strong as they always were.

~~He still wanted Zoro.~~

"Yeah." He said simply, "I trust Zoro."

Zoro's dead heart warmed even as something that he thought might be _guilt_ gnawed at him, knowing what he would eventually be forced to do to his captain. The tune went discordant and off beat for just a moment, and Zoro grimaced slightly in his "sleep."

"But he's…" _'a demon,'_ Zoro finished mentally.

"Zoro's Zoro." Luffy stated decisively, and Zoro could see in his mind's eye the way his little captain must be crossing his arms over his chest while nodding firmly to himself.

"You're _sure_ he's not gonna turn on you?" Ace asked, and Zoro could practically _taste_ his worry.

It was oddly pleasing to him that his captain had such a caring family.

"Zoro won't." Luffy said the words with such _Certainty_ that if Zoro needed to breathe, he'd be entirely unable to do so, suddenly choked up by the weight of his captain's wholehearted _Trust_ in him.

~~_He's not worthy! He doesn't deserve this! His captain_ **_can't_ ** _trust him! He_ **_can't!_ ** ~~

"...Huh. You're _really_ sure about that, aren't you?" Ace remarked, sounding surprised. 

"Of course I am!" Luffy sounded almost _offended_ as he whined the words, and Zoro had to suppress a chuckle at the mental image he had of his captain puffing his cheeks out in annoyance. "Zoro's a good guy! I can tell!"

Zoro's heart _wrenched_ in his chest, doing its best to claw its way into his throat to choke him on his own unworthiness of the love and trust his little captain had for him.

~~_Stop! Please! He's not worthy of that love! He's not good enough! He's_ **_horrible,_ ** _and_ **_broken,_ ** _and such an_ **_ugly, twisted thing!_ ** _Don't say things like that! Pleasepleasepleasepleaseithurtsithurtsit_ ** _huRtShE'snOtWOrTHy_ ** ~~

Ace chuckled, and Zoro could imagine that he'd reached out to ruffle Luffy's hair.

"Well, alright. If you say so." He sounded so warm and fond, and Zoro could _feel_ how much Ace loved Luffy, and it made his entire being prickle ~~with jealousy why didn't anyone love _him_ like that??~~ a bit uncomfortably.

"Shishishi! I _do_ say so!" Luffy exclaimed, "Zoro's the best!!"

There was another warm chuckle from Ace before footsteps could be heard heading away, followed by the rustling of fabric as Ace laid down to sleep.

"Captain." Zoro said out loud as he heard Luffy start going past, opening his eyes to stare seriously at him, "You know what I'm gonna do to you when our deal ends." _'You can't trust me.'_

Because it _was_ a "when," not an "if."

Luffy looked at him, expression blank but eyes uncomfortably knowing. It felt a great deal like his little captain was staring into the deepest depths of his dark, twisted soul.

~~He wondered what it was that his captain saw, when he looked at him. Was he worth seeing?~~

"I know." His captain said simply, blinking once, "Zoro will do what Zoro needs to do, and that's okay." 

Such simple acceptance! Zoro's throat felt oddly clogged, and his chest _burned._

"But what does Zoro _want_ to do?" His captain continued, tilting his head to one side, looking curious, and Zoro could feel that Luffy _genuinely wanted to know._

But Zoro didn't know how to answer. 

He couldn't recall a single time that anyone had ever asked him that before.

~~It hurt.~~

"It's okay if Zoro doesn't know the answer yet." Luffy said kindly, smiling warmly.

 _What was this???_ Zoro didn't understand!

"It's okay that Zoro doesn't understand yet, too." His captain continued with a nod, "Zoro's got time to figure out what _Zoro_ wants, 'cause Zoro's allowed to want things just 'cause _Zoro_ wants them, and not just 'cause Zoro's been _told_ to want them."

Zoro's captain pinned him with an intense, meaningful stare. 

"Zoro deserves to be free, too." And with a pat to Zoro's cheek and one last smile that put sunshine to shame, Luffy headed off.

It was strange how such a tiny boy could make a monstrous thing like Zoro feel so very _small._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I, personally, really like this chapter!! It was a struggle to figure out how to start it, but I think it turned out really, really well!!! It sets the stage for some things later on... or does it? >=3c


	17. Dangerous Woman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew gains a mysterious new member.

Alabasta was _miserably_ hot and dry. Zoro kind of loved it, but also...very much _didn't._ It helped that he didn't _need_ water to keep going, as it meant his nakama had more resources for themselves, though the dryness of his throat largely prevented him from speaking, which was quite annoying.

He watched in amusement as his captain and Vivi fought over how to deal with the rebellion, and was even more amused by the trap they'd fallen into at Rainbase. 

Crocodile began taunting them all, talking about how they'd fail and die, drowned like rats, stuck in the cage they'd fallen into.

"Hot." Zoro commented with a smirk, getting a rather odd look from the Warlord and his partner in response.

"You _promise_ that I'll suffer?" Zoro asked, pressing against the bars with a grin, "Don't tease me, now~."

"...You're not right in the head, are you?" The Warlord asked after a brief, incredulous pause, arching one eyebrow. His face remained remarkably neutral, and Zoro couldn't help but respect that.

"Where's the fun in that?" Zoro asked in return, still grinning, "You're made of sand, right? I can think of _so many things_ that can be done with a power like that…" He purred.

The Warlord chose to ignore him after that, instead continuing to taunt them all.

Zoro pouted.

This man was no fun at all.

His twisted, broken desires were interesting, though...but not as interesting as the desperation and fear he could feel from the woman standing at the Warlord's side.

 _'Nico Robin…'_ He mused, idly wondering what had happened in her life to leave her so close to utter despair.

\-----

After parting ways with Vivi and escaping the marine blockade, the rest of the crew was in a slump. The sheer misery was as delightful as it was choking.

"If you'd _really_ wanted her with us, you could have taken her by force." Zoro pointed out.

"Ahhh! You neanderthal!!!" Chopper exclaimed.

"You suck!" Nami spat.

"Marimo." Sanji sneered.

"Three sword style." Luffy said disdainfully.

"Wait, Luffy, that's not an insult." Usopp pointed out.

 _"Four_ sword style." Luffy corrected, in the same unhappy tone of voice.

"You only added one!" Usopp chided, beginning an explanation of how to _actually_ insult someone.

Zoro just stared at them all, _deeply_ unimpressed, then began walking away. He was so done with their nonsense.

The door to the galley opened as their stowaway finally made herself known.

"So we finally got away from the island." She mentioned, leaning against the doorframe.

"Yeah." Zoro agreed, rubbing the back of his head, "Finally decided to show yourself?" He asked in return, turning and arching an eyebrow at her while the others slammed their heads against the railing they'd been sulking under, letting out cries of surprise.

Zoro couldn't help snickering at them.

"So you knew?" Nico Robin asked, looking curious and wary.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Nami screeched, clutching the bump on her head.

"Take cover! Take cover!" Usopp shouted into a megaphone he'd pulled from who knows where while Chopper ran back and forth on the railing, wailing in terror.

"Yeah. Hard not to, when a soul that ain't crew's on the ship." He answered with a shrug.

Her gaze turned sharply calculating as she stared at him, as though attempting to dissect him with her eyes while the rest of the crew stood in a half circle around her, ready to fight, if need be.

(It would not be needed: She had no desire to fight them unless forced to.)

"I suppose I should have expected nothing less from someone such as yourself." She remarked, and Zoro could almost feel the gears in her head frantically turning, desire to know warring with desire to stay safe warring with desire to toy with them warring with desire to be loved and accepted.

So many conflicting desires! What an interesting woman!

"Tell me," She continued, "Are you _actually_ a demon, or merely a mortal heavily steeped in dark forces beyond mortal comprehension?" She was genuinely interested in knowing the answer. How fascinating!

"You know an awful lot, don't you?" He asked in turn, smirking as he crossed his arms over his chest, "I wonder… What would you do with the knowledge, if you got the answer?"

Zoro already knew, of course: Her interest in his nature was purely and strictly academic. She wanted to know _simply_ to know; she had no desire to _do_ anything with the knowledge. Still, he couldn't help teasing her, just a little.

She wanted to join the crew, after all, even if it _was_ purely for selfish reasons...and Zoro's captain kinda wanted her.

That basically made her nakama already.

"Who is she?" Chopper asked softly, hiding behind the stair rail next to Sanji, whose desire for their stowaway was almost nauseatingly sweet.

"It doesn't matter who she is!" The shitty cook enthused, "She's a beautiful lady!"

The woman stared at Zoro with an unreadable stare, and Zoro could almost _feel_ her mind racing as she tried to figure out what to say to manipulate him in the direction she wanted.

He decided to throw her a bone; her despair was just too sweet for him to resist.

"I'm a demon." He confirmed with a nod, still smirking as he regarded her.

Her eyes narrowed ever-so-slightly as she took in this information. He could feel her desire to ask who, exactly, on the crew had made a contract with him. He wondered which of his nakama she thought had done it.

Instead of asking, however, she turned and began walking towards one of the storage boxes along the wall, and Nami's climatact was knocked out of her hands.

"Don't point dangerous things at me. I told you that before, didn't I?" She asked, tone mildly chiding. She apparently considered her conversation with Zoro over.

"How long have you been on this ship?!" Nami demanded.

"The entire time." Robin said simply, rummaging around, "These clothes are yours, aren't they? I'm borrowing them." She pulled out a deck chair.

 _ **"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, BAROQUE WORKS?!"**_ Nami screeched, shaking her fists and fuming.

Robin ignored her, choosing instead to look at Luffy.

"Monkey D. Luffy." She began, voice serious, "You aren't forgetting what you did to me, are you?"

The cook freaked out.

 ** _"LUFFY!"_ **The cook raged, shaking their captain by the front of his robe, _"What the hell did you do to this beautiful lady?!"_

Zoro did nothing to stop this, in part because he knew the cook had no desire to _actually_ hurt their captain, and in part because his captain was entirely unbothered by what the perverted idiot was doing.

Meanwhile Usopp continued advising everyone to disembark while hiding behind the mast as the cook continued throttling Luffy, and Chopper was trying to escape by climbing the mast, hiding the wrong way.

Zoro wondered what he'd done to deserve being on a crew with so many idiots.

Then he remembered.

 _'Oh. Right. I'm a demon. That's probably pretty bad karma.'_ He mused, idly scratching one cheek with his index finger.

"Oi, you!" Luffy said, finally speaking up with a small pout after a long period of staring uncomprehendingly at the woman, "Don't lie! I didn't do anything!"

"Yes you did." The woman contradicted with a small, enigmatic smile, casually leaning back in the deck chair she'd borrowed, "You put me through some very excruciating treatment. Take responsibility."

How devious! This woman was _Trouble._

This set off another round of the idiot cook shouting furiously and shaking Luffy like a ragdoll, demanding to know what the captain had done to the woman.

 _'What an idiot.'_ Zoro sighed internally, cleaning one ear with his pinky finger, largely having lost interest now that any threat of _genuine_ violence was over.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Luffy insisted, glowering at the woman, "What do you want me to do?!"

"Allow me to join your nakama." She said, leaning her elbow on her knee and resting her chin upon the palm of her hand, still smiling enigmatically.

 _ **"HUUUUUHHHHH?!"** _Most of the crew chorused, with Sanji _immediately_ agreeing to her request vehemence and volume equal to the disbelief the rest of the crew expressed. Zoro remained silent, content to observe.

His captain agreed to let the woman join, to the dismay of all but the cook. Their distrust didn't last for very long, however, as the remarkably cunning woman proceeded to _masterfully_ manipulate Zoro's nakama into accepting and trusting her.

What a dangerous woman!

It was almost enough to make Zoro consider pursuing a woman!

Almost.

\-----

Later on, she approached him while he stood by himself, watching the ocean. She probably intended to try and curry favor with him like she had the rest of his nakama.

It wouldn't work.

"I know your desires aren't in line with my Captain's." He bluntly informed her as she came to stand beside him, "I know you're gonna cause Trouble."

She paused, assessing him, body tense as she waited for an attack that wouldn't come.

He simply continued staring out over the open ocean, expression impassive.

"However," He continued, voice serious, "Captain's decided that you're nakama, so all of that doesn't matter."

"...He's the one who made a contract with you, isn't he." It wasn't a question.

"He is." Zoro confirmed.

"Interesting." She stated, tone and expression inscrutable.

Zoro just grunted in response.

He could feel that she had more questions she desperately wanted to ask him, but instead of asking, she slunk away, steps silent against the wooden deck.

That suited him just fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so Robin joins the crew!! She and Zoro have an interesting dynamic, imo, because neither of them's quite sure just *HOW* much the other one knows!  
> Zoro rather likes her, though!
> 
> I skipped over most of Alabasta because... Nothing much would really change, and I didn't wanna just rehash everything exactly as it happened in canon, 'cause that's boring for both me and all of you. So we just got a highlight of Zoro flirting with Croco-boy and getting ignored before skipping to Robin joining the crew! adsjklffd;l


	18. Plaything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Strawhats stop off at an island for a while, and Zoro goes out to find someone to "play" with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for: Murder, Manipulation, Unhealthy Relationships, and Zoro Being A Demon

Some time after leaving Alabasta, they stopped on a lovely fall island. It would take about a week for the log pose to set, so they had a fair bit of downtime on their hands. 

Most of the crew went out to go see the sights and shop around for supplies, books, or whatever else caught their various fancies. While they were off the ship, Zoro stayed behind to keep watch and nap against the railing closest to the dock, taking in the feel of the desires of those passing by, doing a little "window shopping" of his own. 

Sanji was the first to return, carrying the groceries he'd picked up while out in town. Zoro stood and stretched languorously, letting out a big yawn before scratching his belly. He slid his swords back through their loops and sauntered over to help the cook with the supplies.

"Now you're back, I'm gonna disembark and go look around, myself." He said while helping the cook put everything away.

"Mm, whatever. Don't get lost." The curly bastard said dismissively, and Zoro jumped off the side to saunter into town.

As he wandered aimlessly through the ever-shifting streets, he felt out the desires of those around him. Most were perfectly benign and uninteresting, but then…

Someone bumped into him.

"Oh! I'm so sorry! Are you alright?" The man asked, smiling kindly but sheepishly at Zoro, rubbing the back of his head.

Zoro blinked at him, then smiled back, kind and forgiving.

_'Perfect.'_

"Oh, no problem; I wasn't paying attention, either." He said with a soft laugh, waving it off.

"I haven't seen you around before; did you just pull into port?" The man asked curiously.

"Yeah; just got here this morning. Been looking forward to seeing the sights. Maybe try out the local brew." Zoro answered, expression open and friendly.

"Oh yeah? Maybe I can show you around, then, since I bumped into you like that?" The man offered, smiling a little wider, "I'm Ryan, by the way!" He added, holding out a hand. 

"Zoro." Zoro said in turn, taking the man's hand and giving it a firm shake.

"Pleasure to meet you, Zoro!" Ryan said cheerfully, "C'mon! I'll show you all the best places in town!"

"Oh, no, the pleasure's all mine." Zoro purred in response, his smile slowly widening behind the man's back until it showed far too many teeth to be anything but _predatory_ as he followed. 

\-----

The week came to a close, and the Strawhats were packing up to head off to the next island on their journey. As they were boarding, Ryan came rushing forward, looking desperate and almost _manic,_ his body covered in livid-looking injuries, including what looked like a number of _bite marks_ that had been sunk deep into his flesh.

"Wait!! Zoro!!" He called out, drawing attention.

"Do you know this guy?" Usopp asked in a low voice, leaning towards Zoro.

Zoro shrugged with a noncommittal sound.

"Please! Did I do something wrong? I can fix it! I can do better! I'll do whatever you want! Just please stay with me!!" Ryan begged, darting forward to clutch at Zoro's hand, wide eyed and pleading. 

Zoro glanced dismissively at him, visibly unimpressed. 

"The week's up. My captain says it's time to go." He said bluntly, indifferent to the older man's plight.

"Wait!!!" Ryan gripped tighter to Zoro's hand, "If you won't stay, then- then I'll go with you!!! I'd do _anything_ for you! _Give_ anything to you! Anything at all! Just say the word!!"

Zoro stopped, and looked back at Ryan with an expression of vague interest, an icy ghost of a smile appearing on his lips as he set down the sack he was carrying in the hand the man wasn't clutching.

 _"Anything?"_ He asked, voice lilting slightly.

"Yes!!!" The man exclaimed, nodding wildly and grinning madly at finally having gotten Zoro's attention, eyes unsettlingly wide and frantic, _"Anything!!!_ Anything at all! Everything that's mine is yours!! Anything you want me to do, I'll do it!!! Whatever you want!!! I swear!!"

Zoro's smile widened as he turned more fully towards the other man.

It was not a nice smile.

"Even if I asked for your heart?" He asked, feigning innocence with a blink and a tilt of his head.

Ryan nodded frantically.

"It's already yours, my love!!"

"How about your soul?" Zoro asked almost conversationally, smile a bit wider and more predatory, a hint of teeth showing through his lips.

"You want it? It's yours!!" Ryan insisted, not hesitating for even a second, leaning closer to Zoro like a plant leans towards the light.

Zoro's smile widened even further, displaying far too many teeth to be anything but malevolent, his eyes glittering with malice. He raised one hand to lightly stroke the other man's cheek.

Ryan nuzzled into his hand without a second thought, eyes fluttering closed as he practically _purred_ in adoration.

"What if I asked for your life?" Zoro asked, voice soft and velvety as his hand slowly made its way towards Ryan's jaw.

"It's yours to do with as you please, my love!" Ryan said, utterly besotted as he stared up at Zoro, all mindless, puppyish devotion.

Zoro's grin turned downright demonic, both hands now cupping the other man's face.

"Then die for me." He ordered, sharply twisting Ryan's head around to face the opposite direction with a sickening snap, crackle, and pop.

He let go, and the man's corpse collapsed to the ground like a puppet with its strings cut. 

**_"WHAT THE FUCK?!!?"_ **Sanji shouted, echoed by more than a few others.

"He was just a plaything." Zoro stated with a shrug, "I was never gonna take him with me."

"Zoro." Luffy stated seriously, drawing the demon's attention, "We don't kill innocent people."

"And he wasn't." Zoro stated simply, scooping up the sack he'd put down and walking away from the body, "He had a nasty habit of luring sweet, young things to his house and then torturing them until they finally broke completely...and then he'd kill them." He smiled, "He targeted those just passing through, because after all," his smile widened as he spread his arms, "Who'd notice if a stranger goes missing?"

"Oh, so he was a bad guy?" Luffy asked, relaxing.

"Yeah." Zoro agreed, "You would've been exactly his type, Captain; just as well he met _me_ first, hm?" His smile shifted to something a bit more genuine as he regarded Luffy, but he still looked far too amused about what he'd done.

"Yeah, Zoro's good at dealing with gross people." Luffy agreed easily with a nod, smiling sunnily.

"Luffy...?! Are you not gonna question him more thoroughly??? He just MURDERED someone!!" Usopp hissed, eyes wide.

"You would've been his type, too, Usopp: All wide-eyed and innocent." Zoro remarked casually as he boarded the ship.

"Then why the hell'd he go after _you,_ Marimo?" Sanji asked, sneering slightly, eyes cold and guarded.

Zoro...mildly regretted so openly murdering his plaything, now. His crew was scared of him, now, and that made something deep inside of him _ache_ for a reason he couldn't quite figure out. It wasn't even a type of ache he could _enjoy,_ either, which made it _worse._

Outwardly, however, Zoro just widened his eyes and pouted slightly, placing his free hand over his heart, suddenly looking so much younger and more innocent. So sweet, so naive, so easily led, and oh- _so_ -trusting.

"Whatever do you mean, sir?" He asked, looking concerned and slightly saddened, "I'm terribly sweet and innocent, didn't you know? The perfect little lamb!" The look immediately dissolved as his eyes narrowed and a wicked smirk spread on his lips, "Or so he thought."

"What did you even _do_ to him…?" Nami asked, looking like she didn't _really_ want to know, but was morbidly curious.

Zoro smiled at her.

"I just played with him until he enjoyed it as much as I did." He said, as though that was a perfectly acceptable thing to have done. He opened his mouth to continue, but Nami quickly cut him off.

"Wait! Stop! I don't wanna know!!" She exclaimed, waving her hands.

Zoro pouted.

"Well fine then. Guess you _don't_ wanna know that I got him to give me everything of value that he owned, then."

Nami immediately had a change of opinion, grinning with beri signs in her eyes.

 _"Valuables?"_ She asked eagerly, hands clasped together in front of her.

Zoro nodded with a smirk, setting down the sack he'd been carrying.

"Had most of it turned into cash, but kept the smaller valuables for you to pawn off or keep." He said, pulling another bag out of his haramaki and setting it down.

Nami immediately opened them, revealing a number of gems, pieces of jewelry, and other accessories with value. She giggled giddily, already calculating how much she could get from them.

"Zoro, have I told you lately that you're my _favorite?"_ She asked, giving him an adoring look and batting her eyes.

Sanji yelped a "Nami-san NO!" in the background, and was ignored.

"I don't think you've ever told me that before." Zoro said frankly, amused.

"And you'll never hear it again!" Nami chirped with a teasing grin, sticking her tongue out at him.

She'd already largely forgiven him for the murder...though she'd still be wary for a while.

They all would.

Zoro was just gonna have to live with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. Now you all know what Zoro meant when he told Sanji he'd be finding others to "play" with.


	19. Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On Jaya, they met a man who is not a person.

A ship fell from the sky, and the log pose was pointing _up._

"I don't actually _need_ any diving equipment, y'know." Zoro pointed out, "I don't need to breathe."

"But what if we need to talk to you?" Chopper pointed out reasonably.

"Eh… _Fine_." He sighed, and so he, Luffy, and the cook were put into makeshift diving suits and sent underwater.

They found a lot of junk, but nothing of any particular value. Zoro _did_ insist on keeping the weird water scooter thing, though. It vaguely reminded him of something. He wasn't quite sure _what,_ but it was a memory _not_ attached to something that left him choking and cold, so it was a nice change of pace. (Somehow, he just never managed to enjoy the other flashes of memory…)

There was a monkey.

Or was it a man?

Zoro… Actually, honestly couldn't really tell. He felt like a man, but also like a monkey.

How utterly bizarre.

After they threw that man off their ship after seeing two very large shadows, they found an eternal pose to a place called "Jaya."

Jaya… Was exactly Zoro's kind of place. A den of sin and debauchery, with a potential rapist and/or murderer around every corner.

"Now remember: We're NOT going to start fights here, okay?" The witch insisted, glaring at him and Luffy, her hands on her hips.

"Why not?" Zoro asked, frowning.

"We're _trying_ to get _information,_ and we _can't do that_ if you two **_idiots_ ** start fights with everyone!" Nami hissed, poking him repeatedly in the forehead, much to his consternation, "So you both had _better_ promise me that you won't start or get into any fights!" She continued, grabbing hold of Luffy's cheeks and beginning to pull.

"I pwomise, Nami…" Luffy agreed sadly as the woman pulled aggressively on his rubbery cheeks.

The witch turned on Zoro, and he stared at her eagerly. She glared suspiciously at him, then pressed her finger against the tip of his nose.

"Luffy promised, so you better promise too, Zoro!" She said pointedly, jabbing her finger against his nose a couple times to help drive her point home.

Zoro scowled. He wanted to _play,_ dammit! But…

"Fine. I _promise_ I won't start or get into any fights unless Luffy says otherwise." He grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and sulking.

Nami sighed, withdrawing her hand.

"I guess that's the best I'm gonna get from you…" She said, mostly to herself.

And with that, they set off.

Their first stop was a hotel, but it was already booked in full by a group run by a guy named "Bellamy." They were pretty serious jackasses.

"Who let this raggedy looking group in?" The woman in the group asked, sneering at them.

"Are they too poor to afford proper clothes?" The silver haired man asked, and Zoro could feel his desire to mock them further, "Here, have some money to buy yourself _real_ clothes!"

And with that, he carelessly flung some money into the air so that it fell on the ground between them. A clear insult.

He could feel Nami's rage growing, her desire to beat them to a pulp warring with her desire to just leave and possibly cry in frustration.

Zoro rather wanted to cut them down to size, himself. He rather thought they'd look much better cut off at the knees.

But the witch dragged them away before he could.

\-----

While traveling to their next destination, they passed a number of truly _twisted_ individuals. A sniper shooting down seagulls. What looked to be a wrestler climbing on buildings declaring he would be champion. A sickly man on the ground next to an equally sickly horse.

Luffy insisted that Zoro help him sling the man back onto his horse, and Zoro did so, despite his intense mistrust. He could _feel_ the malevolent desires inside of that man. He could _feel_ how much harm he intended.

But Zoro's captain's word was law, so Zoro helped him put the man back on his horse.

The man thanked them, and held out a basket of apples as a "reward" and Zoro reached forward to stop his captain from taking one… But the boy was too fast, and had already shoved one in his mouth.

"Thanks, old man!" He said cheerfully, suffering no ill effects from the apple he'd consumed.

The sick man laughed.

"You're a lucky kid!" He said, and Zoro narrowed his eyes at him, stepping forward and over slightly so he was standing between his captain and this man, hand resting on Wado Ichimonji's hilt. Sandai Kitetsu was bloodthirsty, and would gleefully cut and bleed the man dry… But Wado Ichimonji… Wado Ichimonji was as angry as Zoro. Together, they would make the man _suffer._

But they instead departed as the man walked away, and they heard an explosion behind them.

"Zoro…" Nami began, looking suddenly pale, "Those apples were…"

"A trap." He confirmed, expression serious as he stared straight ahead of them, paying close attention to their surroundings.

Nami gulped and shuffled a little closer to him.

Better the devil she knows than the ones she doesn't, Zoro supposed.

\-----

As they approached their destination, Zoro could feel a growing darkness that left a chill in his soul, and the music grew louder and more complex in his head. More discordant.

Almost like a warning.

They entered a bar, and Zoro fought the urge to freeze up and shiver in mixed delight and disgust at the pure **_Darkness_ ** filling the place. It was all coming from a single man, seated right at the bar. All of his dark, twisted desires shining like a _beacon_ to Zoro.

Zoro wanted to hunt.

Zoro wanted to play.

Zoro wanted to _kill._

His captain, however, _immediately_ went up to the bar and began ordering food and drink, sitting directly beside the Dark Man, so Zoro and Nami followed, Zoro sitting to his captain's left, and Nami sitting to Zoro's left. He ordered a single beer, and nursed it slowly as he kept his senses trained on the Dark Man sitting so close to his captain.

Nami complained about the town, and how people looked down on poor pirates, evidently still pissed about their earlier encounter, and the barkeep told her that the log pose would set in four days.

Zoro wasn't paying any attention to that, however; he was far more intent on the man sitting on the other side of his captain, for all that he feigned being more interested in his ale than the Dark Man.

"HEY OLD MAN!" Both his captain and the Dark Man chorused loudly, slamming their fists on the table.

"Huh? What is it?" The barkeep asked, turning around.

"THIS CHERRY PIE IS SO TASTY I COULD DIE!" The Dark Man exclaimed, looking blissful.

"THIS CHERRY PIE IS SO NASTY I COULD DIE!" Luffy exclaimed, looking disgusted.

Both phrases were said in complete unison, before pausing, also in unison, with a sound of confusion.

In unison, they turned to glare at each other out of the corners of their eyes.

They both took a long swig of their drinks, and slammed them back down onto the counter, Luffy looking delighted and the Dark Man looking disgusted.

"This drink is especially DISGUSTING!" The Dark Man exclaimed.

"This drink is especially DELICIOUS!" Luffy exclaimed.

Both still in perfect sync, right down to their confused sounds and turning to glare at each other once more.

"Jerk, you got something wrong with your tongue?" The Dark Man asked menacingly.

"You got something wrong with your head?" Luffy asked in return, glaring back, and something in Zoro was screaming that this wasn't _safe!_ His captain was in _danger!_

The two then got into a fight over who could take the most food to go, Luffy wanting meat and the Dark Man wanting cherry pie.

Thankfully, it resolved peacefully, though Zoro could tell that his little captain had caught the man's interest...and that he, himself, had caught the man's interest.

He didn't like it.

He watched warily from the corner of his eye as the Dark Man left, but he knew equally as well that he hadn't gone far, his shadow still darkening the doorstep of the bar.

\-----

Bellamy and his crew showed up later, questioning Luffy about his bounty, and generally being a nuisance.

And then Nami asked about the sky island, and suddenly everyone was laughing and jeering at them. He could feel Luffy's growing anger, and Nami's mortification...and then someone threw a bottle at his captain.

Zoro sneered, and made to draw one of his swords… but his captain held out a hand.

"Don't fight." He ordered, "Whatever happens, don't. Fight."

Zoro's fingers briefly tightened around the hilt of his sword, spasming as he briefly fought the order, but his grip relaxed and he let his arm drop to his side.

He could not disobey a direct order…

And really, none of these scum were good enough to be tasted by his blades, anyway.

The beatdown they got was almost as lackluster as the ones he'd been given all the way back in Shells Town, where he'd first met his captain. It was of mild interest when his head got slammed through a window, giving him some nasty cuts and bruises, and the bottles that got slammed into him were also rather pleasantly painful.

He couldn't fully enjoy the suffering due to the witch's desires twisting up into desire to hide, desire to fight the people in the bar, desire to throttle Zoro and Luffy, and _desire to cry._

Normally Zoro would enjoy such desires, but they were oddly displeasing when they came from one of his nakama. It unpleasantly twisted something in his gut and in his chest.

He didn't much care for it.

He cared even _less_ for the bastards who so heavily implied that they thought Nami was for _sale._ His fingers itched to bury themselves in the guts of the one saying such things about one of Zoro's nakama. Itched to reach in and snap open his ribcage rib by rib until they stood poking out of his torso like a botched dissection.

He wanted the fucker to **_bleed._ **

But his captain said not to fight, so those desires remained simply that: _Desires._

How delightfully appalling.

At least the witch proved her spine was made of steel by completely dismissing the ones harassing her, instead dragging himself and Luffy out of the bar with her, even as the patrons continued laughing and throwing bottles at them.

Outside, however, the Dark Man sat waiting for them.

"The sky island exists." The Dark Man announced as Nami carried Luffy out under one arm, pulling Zoro along behind her by her grip on his wrist. 

Nami paused to stare at him, narrowing her eyes.

The Dark Man took a bite of pie so big half the pie disappeared in one go.

"ZEHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The Dark Man laughed, the sound grating on Zoro's ears and putting him even further on edge, "The cherry pies here really are the best!"

Nami dropped Luffy and released Zoro's wrist.

"You're that guy…" Nami said in realization.

"Why so angry, young lady?" The Dark Man asked around a mouthful of pie, "They're the ones who won the fight."

"What?" She asked, turning more towards the Dark Man while Luffy stared at the man with an inscrutable expression from his place on the ground.

"Your sharp retort was really something, too." The Dark Man told Nami, gesturing toward her with one hand, "You've got nerves of steel. ZEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Zoro!" Nami gasped, as Zoro moved to stand protectively between his nakama and the Dark Man, "Luffy!" she added, watching their captain stand up and brush himself off.

Zoro's captain set his hat properly back atop his head, and turned to stare at the Dark Man with an unreadable expression, eyes shadowed by his hat.

"The new era they're talking about is crap!" The Dark Man said, gaze intense as it stared at them. Zoro could feel the dark desires the man had, and stared him down. He would _not_ let this man near his captain. He would not let this man near **_any_ ** of his nakama.

"The era where pirates have dreams will be over, they say?! Huh?! ZEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" The Dark Man continued, holding his arms out wide as he laughed.

Luffy's expression continued to be unreadable as he stared at the Dark Man through shadowed eyes.

The Dark Man slammed his bottle of rum back onto the ground, grinning wildly with his gap-toothed grin.

"People's dreams… Have no end!!" He declared loudly.

It was a sentiment Zoro knew his captain shared...but somehow… It felt _different._ Wrong. Twisted.

No wonder his captain looked so unmoved, still staring unreadably at the Dark Man, completely silent.

"Isn't that right?!" The Dark Man asked his captain, leaning forward, eyes lit up with dark glee.

Everyone around them started to snicker and laugh at the Dark Man, pointing and mocking him.

"Outdoing everyone isn't easy!" The Dark Man continued, ignoring the onlookers, instead choosing to burst into wild laughter.

"They can go ahead and laugh at us." The Dark Man said in a quieter voice, "When you aim high, you sometimes come across fights not worth fighting. Isn't that right?!" He asked Luffy, still staring intently right at Zoro's captain, who stared back with that same empty expression.

It wasn't truly "empty" though; simply still. Calm. _Seemingly_ empty. Like still waters with hidden, dangerous depths. There was a _lot_ lurking behind his captain's stare, and none of it could be read.

(It made Zoro want to shiver.)

The Dark Man laughed, eyes sliding to Zoro with clear recognition of Zoro's nature. Zoro could tell from how the Dark Man's desires shifted to include wanting _Zoro._ The man wanted to contract with him. Make him join his crew. Use him and his captain as _playthings._

~~The thought of his little captain being forced into such a position made Zoro feel **_sick._ ** ~~

"Let's go." Zoro stated flatly, wanting _very much_ to be away from this Dark Man with his sickening intentions for Zoro's captain. He was reluctant to turn his back on the beast, however, or to leave either of his nakama unguarded.

Nami looked at him, expression nervous. She very much wanted to leave, too.

Their captain, however, didn't budge, prompting Nami to say his name.

"Oh, looks like I interrupted you." The Dark Man said, standing up and grabbing his things, "Are you in a hurry?" He asked, turning away, adding: "I hope you can go to the sky island!"

With that, the man began walking away, and Zoro's captain _finally_ turned and began walking away, as well, expression still dangerously still.

Nami sped up to be just behind Luffy, softly speaking into his ear.

"Hey, he might've known something about the sky island." She said, looking back at the Dark Man, "I wonder who he is."

"I don't know…" Luffy started, finally speaking up, tone oddly dark and serious, "And that's not a person."

"What? Not a person?" Nami asked, surprised and concerned, "Then what?"

"Dark." Zoro stated seriously, not slowing down at all, _"Wrong."_

 _That_ made the witch pause in her steps.

"You mean… Like a demon?" She asked, now significantly more worried.

"No." Zoro stated, not looking back at all.

"Then what?!" Nami demanded, raising her voice in frustration as she followed after them, "What do you mean?!"

"Hellbound." Zoro intoned darkly, lips twisting downward as the furrow between his brows deepened, **_"Dangerous."_ **

"Then why didn't you kill him?! Luffy never ordered you not to kill!" Nami asked in a furious hiss.

"Those who stand in Hell's way get swept aside." Zoro said slowly as he pondered how best to put his feelings into words, "The same can be said of those who stand in the way of Fate, or Destiny."

"What's _THAT_ supposed to mean?!" Nami demanded, losing her temper.

"We will meet that one again." He said with absolute certainty, "It will not be a good thing."

A bell tolled in the depths of his mind, and he couldn't quite suppress the shiver that ran down his spine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so they meet Blackbeard for the first time!! Note: Zoro doesn't know exactly what Blackbeard's gonna do. If he did, he'd've killed the man, Destiny be damned. He only knows that, whatever the man's plans, they're BIG, and nothing good will come of them... and the Strawhats *will* meet him again.
> 
> Also yeah, I 100% looked up the videos of those meetings, because it's Important.  
> (And also the version I used of Luffy's remark about Blackbeard *is* a valid translation, from what I've read, and I feel it's far more fitting than Luffy saying "that's not a "he,"" especially in this AU.)


	20. "God" in "Heaven"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro doesn't believe in God.

The other side of Jaya was interesting. 

There was only one house, but it was only half a house. A book sat on a stump, full of tales from the North Blue, if the cook was to be believed. How interesting that he'd been born in North Blue; Zoro had always heard that travel between the Blues was exceptionally difficult, and yet the cook had managed it as a child?

He got the feeling it wasn't as simple as the cook made it sound, though, especially judging from how the desire to _play it off and act like it's no big deal_ swelled in the cook's soul. It made Zoro feel a bit twitchy. He could practically _smell_ the concealed pain.

He kinda wanted to play with it.

But the arrival of a man with a chestnut growing out of his head, and then not just one but TWO monkey men rather distracted him.

After the misunderstandings were sorted out, Zoro looked at the monkey men, and then at his captain, who was gleefully chatting with them. He looked back at the monkeys. Then his captain.

"...There's no difference." He muttered out loud, amazed.

The cook snickered nearby, having overheard his remark.

"Yeah. Can't believe we found Luffy's people." The man remarked with a teasing smirk.

"We did it. We found the Monkey family." Zoro stated, a playful grin beginning to spread across his face.

"Can't believe they've been on Jaya all this time." Sanji played along.

They shared a glance, and burst into a fit of giggling.

\-----

 _'This forest is annoying,'_ Zoro decided, scowling at the giant bugs that kept trying to pick a fight with him. They all flinched back, losing their nerve upon sight of him.

He heard the screams and yelps of his nakama somewhere else in the woods, and his glare deepened, causing the bugs to start trembling.

"Are you gonna keep standing in my way?" He growled, eyes flickering black, and the creatures fled.

"My, my, Swordsman-san! You're quite ferocious!" Robin commented idly, looking vaguely amused.

"Tch." Zoro scoffed, continuing forward, "Getting real sick of this bird."

"Can you not sense its soul?" Robin asked, tilting her head in interest.

"If it were a person, yeah, but it's not." He grumbled, slicing down a number of branches that tried to get in his way, "Animals don't have desires like people do."

"You sense souls based on the desires held within them?" She questioned, genuinely interested.

"Yeah," Zoro confirmed, "People are _riddled_ with 'em. Most aren't interesting, but _some_ people…" A grin spread across his face. It was not a nice one, "Oh, some people are truly _twisted."_

He could feel that she had more questions, but that she was almost equally afraid to know the answers.

In the end, they caught the damn bird. 

\-----

Skypiea was… Really fucking pretty. A bit too white and perfect, though. Zoro rather wanted to stain it all red.

He wondered if this was what Heaven looked like.

If so, it was the closest he'd ever get.

\-----

As Sanji learned how to navigate the dials used in the kitchen and the unique sky island foods, a discussion went on in the sitting area. There was, apparently, a God of Skypiea. Interesting. 

Sanji, personally, would only revere such a being if it was a beautiful woman, but he'd never _dream_ of belittling the beautiful Conis-chan's belief!

It was. Quite odd that she and her father seemed so scared of this "God," however...

"I guess you must believe in God, right Zoro?" Usopp asked with a teasing grin. 

"I've never believed in God." The mosshead stated immediately, not bothering to open his eyes as he rested on the couch.

"What? But you're-"

"Exactly." He stated, rudely interrupting, "If something like me can exist, then how can there be a merciful God?"

As much as Sanji didn't want to agree with the Marimo on anything, he had to admit the bastard had a point, in this case. Surely no kind, just, or loving God would allow something like the Marimo exist. 

~~Surely no kind, just, or loving God would allow someone to end up in Hell to become… _That…_ the way Zoro had... ~~

"You all can believe whatever you want," The Marimo continued, sounding completely unconcerned, "It doesn't matter to me one way or the other."

\-----

"If these are the rules Heaven follows, then I'm almost glad I ended up in Hell." Zoro stated out loud as they gazed around them at the sacrificial altar the Going Merry had been placed on. 

"They _do_ seem to be rather arbitrary, don't they?" Robin agreed, sounding vaguely amused as she watched the milky white cloud water teeming with sky sharks.

Zoro punched one that decided to try leaping for them, sending it flying back to crash ungracefully back into the water. He sneered.

"I'm gonna go explore." He decided, heading to the railing of the ship, "I have no desire to stand around waiting to become a sacrifice to a being I don't believe even exists." And with that, he swung across the white sea waters to the shore on a vine he'd grabbed.

\-----

After they all met back up and had their wild bonfire party, the cook dragged Zoro off into the trees for a quick fuck. The cook really was quite a talented lover ~~even if it wasn't love~~. Zoro enjoyed it immensely. 

He enjoyed being allowed to lay next to the cook after returning to the rest of the group even more. Especially when the cook rolled over in his sleep to cling to Zoro, mumbling a soft "Mellorine~…" into the side of his neck.

Zoro couldn't resist reaching over and very softly touching the other man's hair. It was so soft, like silk. He wanted to bury his face into it, but knew better than to risk waking the cook and ruining the moment. 

This was enough. 

He could almost pretend…

Ah, but it was such sweet sorrow to know that's all it was.

As he drifted off, he thought he noticed the ship's desires glowing brighter and clearer. Almost like a voice whispering on the wind, saying _"I want to carry you all just a little farther…"_

\-----

The next morning, Usopp was claiming to have seen a ghost, and the Going Merry had been repaired almost back to full condition, and without the chicken-like additions.

"Zoro, did you sense anyone else around last night?" Nami asked.

"No." Zoro replied promptly, shaking his head, arms crossed over his chest, "The only souls near us that weren't nakama were the wolves."

"But _someone_ repaired the Merry!!" Usopp insisted, motioning at the repaired ship as indisputable proof.

Zoro thought for a moment before adding. 

"...Merry _did_ seem to be glowing, late last night." He admitted, with a very small incline of his head as he frowned in thought, "A faint echo of a distinctly not-human desire."

"Are you saying Merry fixed _itself?"_ The cook asked skeptically, glancing over.

Zoro shrugged. 

"Not exactly, but would that really be the weirdest thing we've encountered on the Grand Line?" He asked in return, knowing the cook would have to concede that point.

The Grand Line really _was_ just _that_ bizarre.

\-----

When Zoro finally saw the "God" of Skypiea… He was not impressed.

Almost sickly pale skin, pale blond hair that made him look even _more_ washed out, a frankly _ridiculous_ fashion sense, even by _Zoro's_ standards - and Zoro actually _liked_ Sanji's wildly, garishly patterned casual shirts! 

And yet the man was so _smug._ He stood with the confidence of a man who could hit it whenever he wanted, and yet…

"You act like a man who thinks he can hit it but misses every single time." Zoro stated out loud, interrupting the conversations going on around him.

Everyone turned to stare a bit incredulously at him.

"What." The so-called "God" said, expression flat.

"You look like you've never fucked a day in your life, and while normally there's nothing wrong with that, you _also_ look like you've tried _really_ hard to fuck, and struck out _every single time,_ and now you're taking it out on everyone around you 'cause you can't score no matter how hard you try." Zoro continued, arms crossed over his chest as he looked the "God" dead in the eye.

Zoro could hear Robin suppressing her giggles off to the side.

The pathetic man gaped at his audacity.

"You dARE speak to me, GOD ENERU, like that?!" The man demanded, voice getting surprisingly shriek-like in his indignation.

"You're no God; you're just a sad, pathetic little man with delusions of grandeur. Same as all the other "Gods" I've met." Zoro drawled, genuinely unimpressed.

He got electrocuted for that, but honestly that was just _encouragement._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eneru sucks so much not even ZORO will flirt with him. kjaldsfjlksf
> 
> Also, this has nothing to do with Zoro's birthday, but happy birthday Zoro!!!!


	21. For Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are many different types of deals. Sanji learns of one of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: References to past torture and panic attacks

During the party after they defeated Eneru, Zoro was sitting behind a pile of debris, nursing a drink as he leaned against the pile of stones behind him, eyes half-lidded.

He glanced over at the cook as he approached, but wasn't particularly interested in responding any further. He could tell the cook had a number of questions for him; it was written all over both his soul and his curlybrowed face. 

"Hiding from the party, Marimo?" The cook asked as he walked over, hands in his pocket and a lit cigarette in his mouth. 

Zoro just grunted at him in response, eyes shifting away from the other man and closing entirely. 

The cook sat down beside him, leaning his elbows on his knees as he took a slow and purposeful drag of his cigarette.

"You used to be human, right?" The cook asked, voice soft.

"Yeah." Zoro grunted in response, opening his eyes to look at the cook, "Why?"

Sanji inhaled slowly, and released a cloud of smoke. 

"Just wondering." He said, feigning indifference before glancing over in a seemingly casual way, "If I ended up down there, would I end up like you?"

Zoro suppressed a shudder at the idea, trying to hide just how strongly everything within him rejected the idea of the cook ending up in Hell. Instead, he turned more fully towards the cook, casting an assessing look over the man, pretending for a moment that he _wasn't_ the man Zoro was in love with.

"You have potential, but you're not damned enough to be made part of the Order of the Gash." He stated, not quite sure how he knew this.

"...Order of the Gash?" The cook repeated, giving Zoro an odd look.

Zoro just shrugged in response and made a vague gesture to try and wordlessly explain that, while the words had come to him, he had no idea what they _meant._

The cook seemed to grasp what Zoro meant, because he sighed but dropped the question. 

"Okay… So you're saying I'm vaguely damned? Is it 'cause of how devilishly popular I am with the ladies?" He asked instead, smirking faintly, as though it was something _funny._ ~~It'snotitisn'twhyareyoulaughing?~~ He then looked slightly more serious, "Or is it 'cause I've fucked you?"

Zoro snorted disdainfully at him, narrowing his eyes. 

"You're not damned because you desire men, cook." He sneered, "You're damned because you willingly and knowingly slept with women cheating on their partners, you willing accessory to adultery."

The cook opened his mouth to protest the first part, and then closed it again and coughed softly to try and cover his embarrassment, cheeks pinking slightly in a way Zoro couldn't help but find horribly attractive.

"You, uh. You know about that?" He asked a bit awkwardly.

Zoro arched an eyebrow at him.

"Your sins are written on your soul." He bluntly informed him.

The cook cleared his throat again.

"Right. Well. Moving past that…" He muttered, stumbling slightly over his words, "How'd _you_ end up in Hell, Marimo? What'd you do that was bad enough to land you down there?"

The second question sounded like it was asked from very far away as Zoro's mind froze.

He no longer saw Sanji sitting in front of him.

The music was deafening.

~~_Cold blue eyes staring hatefully disgusted hatesmehatesmehatesme "Take me and not-"_ ~~

"I… made a deal…" A voice said softly, slowly. He distantly realized that it was his own voice. 

It didn't feel like his.

"Oh? Like Luffy made with you?" A familiar voice asked.

~~**_"You would trade yourself-?"_ ** ~~

Everything was suddenly so much farther away. Where had it gone? 

"No… Not…"

~~_Sunshine yellow matted red red red red. Ocean blue with tears and pain. Blood blood bloodbloodbloodblood. Hooks chains screaming yourselfforhimyourselfforhim_ ** _myselfforhimforhimforhimforhimfor-_ ** ~~

Sanji realized something was very wrong when the Marimo suddenly went very, very still, eyes unfocused. He took a ragged breath, looking almost _panicked._

Sanji wanted to reach out and gently shake his shoulder, but got the feeling that would lead to a rather violent response. Sanji remembered similar reactions from past experiences with some of the cooks back on the Baratie.

"Oi, oi. Focus, Marimo." He said, keeping his voice calm and soft.

The mossy swordsman stopped breathing raggedly. He stopped breathing _at all._ Sanji wasn't sure if that was an improvement or not.

"What _happened_ to you…?" He wondered, not realizing he'd spoken aloud. 

Zoro lifted his head to look at him, eyes unfocused and looking so very _young_ and _frightened._

"He called them. They came." He said in a voice far too small for someone as bold and comfortable in his own skin as the Marimo. It was _wrong._ The mossy bastard should _never_ sound so frightened.

Zoro looked at him suddenly, eyes slightly more focused.

"...Do you hate me?" He asked, in that same, far too small voice.

Sanji couldn't lie in the face of such open vulnerability.

"...No, Zoro, I don't." He said with a small sigh.

That earned him a very small upturn of the Marimo's lips, though he still looked both sad and not fully there.

"You asked me what I made a deal for." He said, but his tone was wrong. _Wrongwrongwrongwrong._ "For him. My life for his."

Sanji's heart dropped.

Oh no.

Oh _no._

A horrible, sad little smile played on the Marimo's lips. He looked almost about to cry.

_Nononononononono_

Zoro looked Sanji dead in the eyes, and _smiled._ It was not a happy smile.

"He hated me." He said, smiling like he wasn't _visibly devastated_ by that fact, looking back down at his hands, which were fidgeting in his lap. 

Sanji felt his own heart cracking, just a little.

After all, if there was anything Sanji understood, it was putting yourself through horrible things for the ones you love, and it was absolutely _heartbreaking_ that Zoro had put himself through **_literal hell_ ** for someone who, apparently, _hated_ him.

"...You have shit taste in men, Marimo." He said out loud, trying to lighten the mood, even though his voice was a little croaky.

He got a quiet, slightly watery snicker from the mosshead, along with a very quiet "Yeah…"

Sanji counted it as a win.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the sweetness of the past chapter, 'cause this one's sad! I'm back on my angsty bullshit! =D


	22. Gold and Chess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of course the Strawhats can't simply LEAVE Skypiea without some sort of melodrama!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Mentions of the upcoming death of the Going Merry and Blood

They "stole" a lot of gold out of a giant snake's stomach, and were about to run from the Skypieans, but Zoro stayed put.

"They just want to give us more gold." He stated when the witch screeched at him. 

That effectively shut everyone up.

Robin giggled her delightfully eerie laugh.

"Fufufu, Swordsman-san is correct." She said, smiling mysteriously. 

The crew did an abrupt about face. 

_"MORE_ gold??!" The witch asked, beri signs replacing her eyes as she cackled somewhat unnervingly.

It warmed Zoro's cold, black heart to see such joy.

Nami practically came on the spot when she saw just _HOW MUCH_ gold the Skypieans were giving them. Zoro side eyed her and raised a judgmental eyebrow. She slugged him in the shoulder. 

"You don't get to judge me when _everything about you_ is made of bizarre, disgusting kinks!" She hissed at him.

That was a harsh but fair assessment.

However...

"If I was human, that'd be a fair statement. However: I'm a demon. S'my _job_ to be a kinky bastard. What's _your_ excuse?" He asked, smirking.

She made a face back at him, but quickly forgot him again in favor of focusing on the gold. 

Of course, then the question became: How much of it could they _actually_ take with them? Merry could only hold so much weight without sinking…

"Oh Zorooo~..." Nami crooned, leaving towards him and getting an arched eyebrow in response, "Is there any Dread Demon Magic you can work to help us keep more of the gold?" She asked, hands clasped in a pleading gesture as she batted her eyes at him. 

Zoro had no idea.

He blinked, tilted his head to one side, and pondered the massive pillar of solid gold, eyes going slightly crossed from his attempt to force his brain to pull something from his hole-filled memories.

...Nope. Still nothing.

He shrugged. 

"No clue." He said, slightly apologetic, "Kinda feels vaguely like I know _something_ along those lines, but. I can't remember."

"Zoro! Remember the thing! Captain's Orders!" Luffy called out on a whim. 

Something _wrenched_ in Zoro's head, his world tilting sideways as space turned inside out. Numbers and impossible geometry filled his mind to the point of maddening, euphoric agony all building up and up and up until he felt like his head was about to explode, and then…

It stopped.

He released his head from the death grip he'd had it in. He felt something wet trickling down his face and flicked his tongue out to taste it: Blood.

He was bleeding.

"-Oro? Zoro? Are you okay?" Chopper's voice asked, and Zoro blinked once and turned to look at the little doctor, finding himself at eye level with him. Huh. When had he crouched down?

He stood, patting the little doctor on the head.

"I'm fine now. Thanks, Chopper." He said, "I remember now, but I think it's best you don't do that again, Captain." He added, flicking his eyes over to Luffy, who nodded back in understanding.

He turned his eyes to the pillar of gold.

"I can't store _all_ of this." He informed the witch bluntly, "But I can store a good chunk of it in a pocket space… but I'll be keeping some of what I store for my own purposes."

He drew his swords and hacked off roughly a third of the pillar, and then made several odd, twisting gestures with his hands and the chunk he'd sliced off vanished into thin air. He grimaced and his face made a few odd expressions in rapid succession before settling back into his usual resting bitch face expression.

"I'll pull it out later." He stated, feeling a persistent itching that just _barely_ bordered on _painful_ at the back of his mind from having stored something so large.

"Can you store anything else?"

Zoro grimaced and shook his head.

"What I've stored is already delightfully uncomfortable; storing anything more would leave me far too distracted to do my actual jobs on the ship." He denied, admittedly quite disappointed that he couldn't _actually_ justify giving himself a persistent migraine. It would be so enjoyable...

"So using this ability causes you pain?" Chopper asked, clearly concerned even while mentally noting the information down.

"Not really?" Zoro said, scratching his head, "It's just kinda uncomfortable to have my awareness of the dimensions expanded so wide by having stored something massive on another plane."

"Interesting… Good to know!" Chopper noted, nodding.

With that, they finally set off and left Skypiea.

\-----

They fell from the sky, saved only by a giant sky balloon octopus, and even _then_ the landing was rough. Zoro winced internally at the way the "soul" of the ship jarred in response, flickering even more than it already was.

It really seemed like… The Going Merry was… _Dying…_ But Zoro wasn't sure how a ship could have a soul, nor how it could "die." It prickled uncomfortably at him, in a way he found quite displeasing.

He was distracted from that by the bright lights and sirens suddenly going off.

They'd landed in a _marine base._

Fucking fantastic.

\-----

Zoro ended up sneaking around a great deal, and somehow found himself in the office of the vice-admiral in charge of the base. The man looked as surprised to see Zoro as Zoro was to see him.

Zoro looked at the chessboard, then back at the man.

"...Wanna play a round before we fight?" He asked with a grin.

The man looked intrigued by the idea, arching an eyebrow. Zoro could feel the desire to test himself against another player.

"Alright." The man allowed, confident that he would win, but desiring a challenge.

Zoro's grin widened as he took a seat across from the man, who was setting up the board.

"I'm a pirate, so I should play black. That's how it works, right?" He purred darkly, eyes half-lidded and an amused smirk on his face.

The man's eyebrow rose again, and he chuckled softly, shaking his head as he made the first move.

"Black and white morality?" He asked, amused as he waited for Zoro's response.

"That _is_ the type of thing you marines seem to enjoy." Zoro said mildly, still smirking as he made his own move.

"I find the world's not quite so simple." The Vice Admiral replied, and Zoro hummed softly in agreement as they played.

"You're correct: The world is awash in shades of grey. Nothing is ever so simple as it first appears." He murmured thoughtfully, clicking a final piece into place, "Ah, also… Pawn takes King. Checkmate." He used his Pawn to knock over the man's King.

The man looked down in surprise, and then, after clearly mentally reviewing all the moves that had been made, began to laugh.

"I never stood a chance, did I?" He asked a bit ruefully.

Zoro graced him with a small, genuine smile.

"No. You didn't." He agreed.

Zoro patted the board as he stood to leave, then he and his crew proceeded to prove to the man just how true those words had been by escaping from the supposedly inescapable Navarone marine base without losing a single thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your demon has remembered a skill!! He can now put things into a pocket space!!


	23. Birth and Regrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The crew has some questions; Zoro answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: References to past torture

It was a nice day. Sunny, fair winds, no storms predicted in the near future.

Zoro was napping on the deck as the others went about doing their own things.

"Swordsman-san, I would like to ask you a couple questions." Robin began from where she was laying on a deck chair reading a book.

"Eh? Ask 'em." Zoro replied, lazily rolling one hand in the air in a "bring it on" gesture. 

"Beings such as yourself do not age, correct?" She asked. 

"Yeah? That's right." Zoro answered, finally opening his eyes to frown curiously at the woman, wondering where she was going with that.

"Are you saying the mossball's _immortal,_ or something, Robin-chan?" The cook asked, eyes flicking over towards Zoro before returning to Robin.

"Yes, that's exactly it. Demons are well known to be nonsenescent beings, and swordsman-san just confirmed it."

"Oh no! I'd put Zoro's age down as 21 because that was my best guess, from his body's condition! But if he doesn't age, then that might not be accurate!" Chopper realized, eyes widening at the thought that he might have accidentally falsified Zoro's medical information. 

"Oh, that's easy to solve!" Luffy laughed, "Oi Zorooo!!!" He called out, causing Zoro to open his eyes again. 

"Yeah?" He asked, turning his gaze to his captain.

"How old are you?" Luffy asked, smiling sunnily. 

"19." Zoro answered immediately, before blinking once and frowning, "No, that's not right…" He muttered, scratching his head. "21? No… 200?" He irritably ruffled his hair. 

He looked up at his nakama, frowning. 

"What year is it?"

"1522." Robin answered promptly, looking both fascinated and amused. 

"Then that makes me…" Zoro ran the math, "Negative three hundred and eleven years old."

"Wow!!! That's OLD!!!!" Luffy exclaimed, eyes massive.

"Wait. _NEGATIVE?"_ Nami asked loudly, frowning, "That's impossible!"

Zoro scowled at her. 

"I know!" He snapped, "It makes no sense, 'cause I could've _sworn_ it had been nearly two hundred years since I died? But I guess not." He was _so_ frustrated with all this amnesia bullshit.

"So you're saying you were born in the year 1833, swordsman-san?" Robin asked, eyes gleaming with her desire to Know. This was clearly _fascinating_ to her.

"...Yeah, I guess I am." Zoro realized, blinking. "Huh. Guess I know my birth year, now. That's… nice, I guess?" He said bemusedly, scratching his head.

"When's Zoro's birthday?" Luffy asked, latching onto a topic that was more interesting to him.

Zoro struggled to think of it.

A frosty night sprung to his mind, with a full moon hanging over head, his breath misting before him.

Frost… Moon?

Shimo... Tsuki?

November.

The word sprung suddenly into his mind, followed by a half-remembered glance at a calendar, with the date set to the eleventh.

"November… Eleventh?" He guessed, with a frown that cleared as he nodded.

Yes, that felt right. It wasn't a _perfect_ fit, like how his name still didn't _quite_ feel like _his_ name, but it was close enough.

"I'll note that down in your file right away!" Chopper exclaimed with a grin, happy for the new information. 

Everyone seemed happy enough with what he'd shared, so he shrugged it off.

\-----

That night, Sanji eyed Zoro's heavily scarred back during the afterglow of their little tryst, tracing the thick, crisscrossing lines with his eyes as he smoked. There were long, thick strokes, as though from a razor-tipped whip. There were thinner, cleaner lines, as though from bladed weapons. Then there were harsh, jagged lines, positioned in such a way it was like someone had torn into it with their _fingernails._

But the worst ones, Sanji thought, were the tiny circular ones. Those ones were the _exact_ right size and shape to have been where someone stubbed out _lit cigarettes_ on Zoro's back. It made Sanji's skin crawl, realizing how easily he, himself, could add to that massive collection of scars. 

All he'd need to do is stick the lit end of his current cigarette into one of the rare clear patches of skin.

The marimo would probably even _enjoy_ it.

But it would also be a complete betrayal of what it meant to be nakama, to shame him further by putting another scar on his back like that.

It kind of scared Sanji, how much _trust_ had been placed in his hands, just from the swordsman having his bare back facing him.

~~Trust that Sanji wouldn't add to his shame.~~

"Just ask your damn question already, Dartboard." The demonic moss grunted, not even bothering to roll over to look at Sanji. 

Rude. 

Still, if he was giving blanket permission like that...

"Do you regret the deal you made?" Sanji asked, watching the marimo carefully in case he responded violently. 

There was a long pause, and then the hellish seaweed finally turned to look at Sanji.

"No." He answered finally, "Not even once."

There was an odd look on his face as he looked at Sanji, that Sanji couldn't quite place.

He got the strong feeling that the expression was _significant,_ somehow, but.

Why would he be looking at _Sanji_ like he was _relieved?_

Sanji was missing something. 

Something big.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So now you have Zoro's birth year!! That gives you another piece of the puzzle that is Zoro's origin! =D


	24. Tea Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you don't have booze to pacify your demon with, then tea will do.

It had started as an act of desperation.

The bastard just _would not stop or back off,_ and Sanji was at his wit's end!

So when the mosshead stepped into the galley, opening his mouth to let something _undoubtedly_ lewd spill out… Sanji shoved the cup of tea he'd made for himself into the demon's hands.

The marimo blinked once, mouth closing as he looked down at the cup he'd been handed, blinking owlishly in surprise. He subtly sniffed the contents of the cup, and then let out a low hum, eyes falling half-lidded in cat-like contentment, and, to Sanji's immense surprise…

He calmly walked over to the table, sat down, and quietly drank the tea he'd been given.

He was shockingly well mannered about it, too! Didn't slurp the tea, and he set the tea cup down with surprising delicacy, creating only the tiniest "clink" against the saucer. He drank it slowly, too, clearly savoring it the way tea was meant to be savored!

Sanji had never expected the brute to be so cultured, at least in regards to tea, but then… He supposed he should've expected it, in retrospect, given how the marimo occasionally lapsed into _incredibly_ formal language and mannerisms.

After finishing the cup of tea, Zoro politely set it down by the sink, thanked Sanji for the tea, and left, leaving Sanji unharassed.

Huh.

Sanji wondered if it would work in other situations, too…

\-----

As it turned out, in the absence of booze, tea was the best way to calm down a rowdy moss demon.

Upon being handed a hot cup of tea, the marimo would _immediately_ settle down and quietly enjoy the beverage.

The _type_ of tea didn't seem to matter, either: He'd drink black tea, white tea, green tea, oolong tea, herbal tea... _Any_ kind of tea would work, as long as it was warm and well-made. (Though he seemed to have a slight preference for black and green teas, if the level of contentment in his expression was any indication.)

So Sanji began making it a _point_ to keep a pot of tea going at all times, in case he needed to distract the demon.

That ended up being both a help and a hindrance, because the mossy bastard began showing up in the galley around the same time every day for tea. Apparently 3:30 pm was "tea time."

This wasn't _really_ an issue, because the marimo never acted up during "tea time" - the one and only time it had been mentioned, he'd reared back slightly and looked _offended_ at the idea. 

"You don't act up during _tea time,_ you _heathen."_ The demon had hissed, scowling in grave offense.

It was honestly hilarious how _scandalized_ he'd been at the idea.

However… It _did_ mean that the moss devil spent a significant length of time in the galley while Sanji worked on setting things up for dinner, or for snacks for the ladies (and the other idiots), which made him a bit… _Conflicted._

~~If he was _always_ this quiet and well-behaved, maybe Sanji wouldn't mind him hanging around more often... ~~

Sanji found that, when it came to tea time, the marimo preferred simple finger foods: Biscuits, cookies, small sandwiches, cheese with crackers, and the like.

Interestingly, it was the only time the marimo would happily consume sweet foods. At any other time, he'd eat sweets only _grudgingly,_ but during tea time, he was perfectly content to consume little cookies or tea cakes, so long as they weren't _too_ overwhelmingly sweet.

Adding snacks to tea time also extended how long the moss would sit quietly and not bother Sanji, and that was an honest relief. 

The flirting wasn't… _always_ terrible, Sanji could admit very, _very_ grudgingly, if only to himself... But Sanji didn't like men.

~~It was kind of flattering, though, to be _desired_ so ardently. Sanji couldn't remember ever having been the one who was pursued like that, and it was oddly thrilling, even if he'd never admit it. ~~

It got a bit frustrating, sometimes, as the moss would occasionally _insist_ that Sanji join him for tea time, and Sanji would _truly_ have preferred to be working on snacks for the lovely Nami-san and Robin-chan, but.

Sitting down and having tea and snacks for half an hour or so _was_ oddly soothing, even if it was time spent with the _marimo._ Sanji felt more balanced, afterwards. A little less temperamental, and better able to focus on other things.

Maybe there was something to the mosshead's "tea time," after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of fluffy filler before we get into the start of Water 7!


	25. Tip of the Iceberg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Games of honor, stolen memories, and a deadly reminder from Robin's mysterious past.

Some idiot and his crew trapped them in and intended to start up a Davy Back fight on this bizarre, elongated island. Something about dishonor if it's refused? Zoro found it kind of funny that apparently pirates were expected to act with honor. Still...

 _'Death is preferable to dishonor.'_ Something hissed in the back of Zoro's mind, and Zoro agreed, even going so far as to state it out loud.

The cook agreed with him, even though it meant disagreeing with Nami.

That was… Shocking, honestly. Zoro wasn't used to being agreed with by the cook.

He shot the man a covert glance from the side of his eye, but the man looked as curly as ever, and his desires were no different from the usual for him, so Zoro let the questions in his mind drop.

~~He hoped that the cook wasn't being affected by their trysts...even if he also hoped he was.~~

The games were agreed to.

"In the spirit of honor and honesty…" Zoro began, a bit disgruntled at having to admit this, "My captain and I are under a death pact, so if I'm taken onto a different crew without him, then I'm obligated to kill someone, whether that be myself, my new captain, or him. Preferably the new captain."

"But wouldn't the contract transfer to your new captain?" One of the Foxy pirates asked, looking unnerved.

Zoro shook his head, arms crossed.

"It's not about him being my captain; it's about me being one of his nakama. If I am _not_ one of his nakama, then I am defaulting upon my end of the deal, and the price for such a breach of contract is **_death._** _"_ He denied, expression and tone deadly serious, words lilting out in a different way than they normally did, though he didn't notice, "And before you ask: No, you cannot buy out my contract. Your crew has nothing that even _approaches_ being equivalent in worth to what I am receiving from my _current_ deal."

Having said all he intended to, Zoro fell silent.

He already knew this was gonna be _so stupid._

\-----

The less said about the stupid seahorse that stole memories, the better.

Zoro had enough issues with memory loss _already,_ thanks.

\-----

After that stupidity ended, they ended up on another island, and began scrounging together supplies to make it to the next stop on the log pose. There were odd tire tracks through the forest...and Robin felt oddly tense. Her desire was to flee, but she also wanted to avoid drawing attention.

They came to a clearing, and Chopper ran into a man standing up and snoring. He woke up due to being bumped into.

"...A tanuki?" The man asked, looking curiously down at Chopper, who glared.

"I'm a reindeer!" He snapped, "See? I've got antlers!"

"Are you okay, Chopper?!" Luffy asked, skidding to a stop as he noticed the man, "Who the heck is this?!"

Zoro skidded to a stop after his captain, and stared at the man.

 _'Oh, this man is_ **_dangerous._ ** _'_ Zoro thought, looking at the very tall man ( _"Kuzan,"_ the man's soul drawled, adding, _"Aokiji"_ afterwards, almost as an afterthought).

His desires were basic: A desire for a nap. A desire not to have to exert himself. _A desire to know about the group Robin had attached herself to._

 _'Ah. So_ **_that's_ ** _how it is.'_ He realized, now highly alert.

He cast an appraising eye over the man, judging their chances…

Ah.

Fuck.

He wasn't even taking them the slightest bit seriously.

"What's up with you guys?" The man asked lazily.

"What's up with you?!" Luffy demanded in return, glaring.

"Wh-who's that huge guy?" Usopp asked as he and Nami caught up.

"Who's that guy?" Nami asked at almost the same time.

Robin stopped behind them, and _froze_ upon sight of him, gasping and falling to the ground.

Zoro's attention shot over to his crewmate, feeling her desires suddenly shift to **_"RUN! RUN AWAY! RUN FAR, FAR AWAY!!!"_ **

She was _terrified_ of this man.

Zoro didn't much like that, but there also wasn't much he could _do_ about it. Not against a threat of this caliber.

He half turned towards her, but made certain to keep Kuzan - _"Aokiji"_ \- in his sights. He was _dangerous_ and Zoro wasn't gonna turn his back on a threat to his nakama if he could help it.

"Robin…" Luffy said softly, alarmed.

More souls began to approach, desires for food, water, and to escape the island written all over them, but they _didn't matter._ Not when a threat was here.

"To think that he got Robin this shaken up…" Nami said out loud, visibly deeply concerned, "Who is he?"

Zoro was half-tempted to answer, but refused to draw attention, instead resting his hands on his swords, one on the hilt, the other beneath the tsuba, his body angled to react _fast,_ if he had to. He chose Wado Ichimonji as the first sword he'd draw, if it came to that.

It would bite the deepest.

Everyone else was ready to fight, too.

"He's a marine." Robin said, expression and voice intensely wary, "Navy Headquarters Admiral… Aokiji."

"Admiral?!" The others chorused while Zoro simply narrowed his eyes.

"A… Admiral? He's that high up?" The cook asked, stuttering slightly in disbelief (and minor fear).

Robin explained how there were only three Admirals in the entirety of the Navy: Akainu, Aokiji, and Kizaru, and that the only one above them was the Fleet Admiral, Sengoku.

This man was one of the ultimate powerhouses of the Navy. That explained why he was so dangerous, then.

"Wh-why is someone like that here?!" Usopp very reasonably asked, hiding behind Zoro, "Why don't you go deal with big-time pirates with several-hundred-million beri bounties?!"

 _''Cause he's here about Robin.'_ Zoro thought, never taking his eyes off of the Admiral.

"G-go somewhere else…!" Usopp finished weakly.

"Hm?" Aokiji said, perking up and looking at Nami, "Arara~."

"W-what?"

"Here's another sexy lady with super big bazongas! Are you free tonight?" The Admiral asked, causing the cook to flip his shit.

 **"WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA, YOU TALL, LANKY JERK?!"** He raged, glaring death at the man...as if he had any _other_ thoughts upon seeing a woman…

 **"PAY ATTENTION, YOU JERK!"** Usopp raged, also glaring.

"Hold on a sec, you guys, geez…" The Admiral said lazily, still _completely_ unconcerned, "Did you hear what I said? I said I just took a stroll, didn't I? Don't get so worked up."

He rested one hand under his chin.

"To start with, you guys are… Whatchamacallit… You know…"

""Wh-whatchamacallit?"" Luffy asked, dumbfounded.

""You know?""" Chopper chimed in, equally befuddled.

"Eh…" The Admiral scratched his head, "I forgot. Oh, well."

 _ **"YOU DON'T MAKE MUCH SENSE!!"**_ Sanji and Usopp chorused, furious.

"What the heck's with this guy?!" Usopp asked, pointing at Aokiji and looking back at Robin, "Oi, Robin, aren't you mistaking him for someone else? There's no way someone like him is a Navy Admiral!"

"No, he is." Zoro contradicted, staring intently at the man before _very_ hesitantly letting his grip on his sword relax, slipping out of his ready position. "...But he has no intentions of fighting us. Yet." He added grudgingly, eying the man with intense suspicion.

Men with that much power could change their minds at any time, after all...and he was _abnormally_ interested in Robin.

"Hey, hey, don't judge someone by their appearance." Aokiji drawled, "My motto as a Marine is "total slovenly justice.""

 ** _"THAT TOTALLY MATCHES YOUR APPEARANCE!!"_** Sanji and Usopp chorused loudly once more.

"In any case, ah, excuse me for a moment…" The man laid down on the ground, completely unconcerned, "All that standing up was making me tired. Umph."

"Then why were you sleeping standing up?" Usopp asked, incredulous and no longer afraid of the man.

"Anyway, to make a long story short, the green haired man is right: I have no intention of capturing you guys, so don't worry."

"Yet." Zoro added, the corners of his mouth tipping even further downward.

"I came to check on the whereabouts of Nico Robin, who disappeared after the Alabasta Incident, that's all."

The desire went _far_ beyond that, but far be it from Zoro to endanger his nakama by poking at _that_ lion.

"Just as I thought, she's been with you guys."

Zoro tuned out most of the rest of the conversation, scowling at this Admiral and the way he filled Robin with terror.

Usopp and the cook stopped their captain when he went to attack Aokiji on impulse to protect Robin. Zoro could hardly fault his captain for attacking the man: His audacity and the refusal to even calculate that the crew's bounty was now $239,000,000 kinda pissed him off, too.

Lazy fuck.

He was powerful enough to get away with it, though.

"Wait, Luffy." Zoro stated, cutting through his captain's anger and the yelling of the cook and the sniper, "He has no interest in taking Robin away." _Yet._

Luffy subsided, though it was clear he was still raring for a fight.

Then the other souls approached, revealing themselves to be survivors of a shipwreck, and the others immediately set to helping them with medical checkups and food.

Zoro kept an eye on the Admiral.

Seeing how he froze a path to the next island, which was several _days_ of travel away… And that the ice was thick enough to support the weight of all those people and the cart they had supplies on… And the ice path would last for a _week_ before melting, and had been created on _salt water,_ which was _much_ harder to freeze than fresh water …

That was a _terrifying_ amount of power. 

And it took mere **_seconds_ ** for the man to do it, even freezing a sea king solid in the process.

Now Zoro knew why the man didn't give a single fuck about them: He outclassed them completely.

**_Fuck._ **

And they were going to have to fight him, Zoro could already tell.

The man poked at Luffy about his grandpa, causing Zoro's captain to freeze up and begin to panic. Alarm rushed through Zoro, but he limited his response to just a glance in his captain's direction before refocusing on the Admiral, hand resting on Wado Ichimonji's hilt.

"Your gramps really helped me out a while back." The Admiral stated, no longer anywhere _near_ as casual as before, which was a _very_ bad sign, "The reason I came here was to have a look at Nico Robin and you. On second thought… Maybe you should die now, huh?"

Zoro angled himself slightly in front of Robin, getting a lightning quick glance of alarm from her. He did not look back at her, leaning forward into a ready position in preparation for the fight that was about to break out.

"The government is still taking you guys lightly, but if I delve into your history, I can tell that your group has a backbone." The man continued, "Though your group is small, since it's gathering shrewd members, it'll probably become a problem later on."

Zoro's eyes narrowed.

"The circumstances that initially led to your search orders… All the actions you took up until now… The speed of your group's progress… I've been dealing with outlaws for a long time, but it worries me to think how you'll turn out." The man was looking _serious_ now.

"Th-that's too sudden!!" Usopp exclaimed, waving his hands before him.

Zoro tuned out most of the conversation, until…

The man began to taunt Robin, using words that they didn't have the context to understand the full weight of, but Zoro could almost _feel_ the impact they had on Robin...and she lashed out, crushing the Admiral to ice with many arms, but, as with the tragically boring Crocodile... The man simply reformed.

 **_Move!_ **

Zoro's instincts **_screamed,_ ** and he shoved Robin back and took the wave of ice head on.

He froze.

Literally. 

Or, well, _half_ of him froze, anyway. 

How exquisitely gruesome! 

"...I'd shatter if you hit me, wouldn't I?" He asked, honestly quite fascinated as he stiffly lifted his frozen right arm to get a better look. He knew he'd just put himself out of the fight, and for virtually no reason.

He was buying time... but there was no way in hell his stupidly brave nakama were going to run.

Fuck.

He was an _idiot._

All he could do now was buy time and hope he thawed enough to be of use when he was needed again, because he _would_ be needed.

"Yeah, you would." Aokiji answered, lazily rubbing the back of his head.

"Oh, you're _honest._ I like that in a man." Zoro purred, smirking flirtatiously even as his mind raced to come up with any sort of a plan.

"Eh, sorry, I'm not really into men, especially not _pirate_ men." The Admiral replied, still casual and unconcerned even in the deadly serious situation.

"Ah, damn, it's always something, isn't it?" Zoro sighed, mentally cursing his lack of body heat, "Can't fault a guy for trying, though, right?" He really didn't care that he'd struck out; he'd known it wouldn't go anywhere from the start. 

This was just about buying time.

"I mean, I _could,_ but that sounds like too much effort." Aokiji said lazily. 

Zoro shrugged his not frozen shoulder.

"That's fair."

**_"CAN YOU STOP FLIRTING WITH THE ENEMY FOR ONE SECOND?!"_ **

Outwardly, Zoro pouted.

Internally, he was cursing up a storm.

He was out of time, and he hadn't thawed out _at all._

\-----

Ultimately, they got trounced. Zoro hadn't been able to do much with half his body frozen, and the others just weren't strong enough to stand up to a man who could freeze untold _miles_ of ocean in seconds.

It was a bitter pill to swallow, as he defrosted in the hot bath, but a defeat simply meant he'd need to train harder and be better prepared for the next time something like this came up.

Because they _would_ encounter more terrifyingly powerful enemies like Aokiji in the future.

Of that, Zoro had no doubts.

He was relieved that they hadn't lost anyone due to this harsh wakeup call. The Admiral was, apparently, the merciful sort.

How _lucky._

They could not afford to trust that the next overwhelmingly powerful opponent they encountered would be so kind as to spare them.


	26. Sankarin Tango

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A moment of rest is given before they get thrown right back into it.

Sanji woke to the sound of someone singing. 

""Järveks luulin merta kerran" runon lausui hän," It was a really nice voice, deep and soothing, rolling over sounds so smoothly it sounded like purring. The syllables were like nothing Sanji had ever heard. 

"Mysteerin sen syövereissä vietti elämän." The voice crooned, making Sanji wake up further at the fact that he  _ could not understand the words. _

"Alla synkän valtameren varjois vaeltaa," He opened his eyes, looking around, and finding Zoro, sitting there with Chopper in his lap, rumbling out lines to a song in a language Sanji had never heard before while gently stroking the reindeer's head, "Etsii tietä valoon luokse armaan ainiaan."

Sanji watched and listened, mystified.

"Yksin sankar yöhön syvemmälle matkaa pois," The song swelled, Zoro's voice rolling smoothly around the strange syllables of whatever language he spoke in, rolling the r's and lilting over the consonants, "Se taakka hänen harteillaan kuin lupaus aina ois." 

Sanji wondered what the words meant.

"Täs pelissä tää narri lyödään maahan aina vaan" 

It was a beautiful melody, but…

"Vaan hetki kuolos lepoo suodaan, jo takas kutsutan."

It felt oddly mournful, in a way that felt almost matter of fact. As though Zoro was shrugging and saying "that's just how it is."

He listened through to the end of the song. 

"I didn't know you could sing." He said softly, as he carefully walked closer, so as not to wake the rest of their nakama. 

"There's a lot of things you don't know about me." Zoro pointed out, voice a soft, deep rumble.

Sanji had to concede that one: The marimo was surprisingly mysterious for someone as blunt as he tended to be.

"I've never heard that song before; what's it called?" Sanji asked instead of addressing that.

"It's called "Hero's Tango," in this tongue." Zoro answered, leaning back against the wall, Chopper in his lap.  


"I was gonna ask: I've never heard that language before."

"Finnish." Zoro said simply, eyes closing.

"Where'd you learn it?" Sanji asked, leaning forward a bit in interest, "Or do you not remember?"

The swordsman shrugged.

"Don't remember." He said, giving the expected answer. 

Sanji hummed in understanding.

"It's a nice song," He remarked, leaning his back against the wall a couple feet down from Zoro, "What's it about?"

"A hero's tragic journey." The swordsman answered, almost humming the words more than speaking them, "Seeking the way back into the light to reach his loved one, but never finding it. Dying over and over again, only to be brought back each time without a moment's rest. A story repeated a thousand times with a thousand faces."

Sanji's face went deadpan.

"That's fucking  _ dark." _ He stated flatly, "And you were singing it to  _ Chopper?" _

The marimo shrugged a bit defensively. 

"He was stressing out over everything, and I figured, lullabies help kids sleep, right? And it's a good song, soothing in tone… and it's also the only one that sprang to mind that was even  _ mildly _ appropriate for a kid." He answered, actually looking a bit sheepish at that last part.

"...I don't even wanna know." Sanji deadpanned after facepalming.

"Liar." The marimo sounded  _ far _ too amused, "You wanna know; you're just too scared to pursue the desire. S'not unusual for you."

If  _ that _ wasn't a pointed remark, then Sanji didn't know what was. 

"The hell's that supposed to mean, bastard?" Sanji hissed, glaring. 

The mossy jackass just shrugged again.

"Not trying to start a fight for once, cook. Just statin' something I've noticed about you." The bastard closed his eyes again, leaning further back against the wall, one hand resting lightly on Chopper's back.

"Those desires… You don't let yourself want 'em. Don't wanna admit they exist, even to yourself. Makes 'em too real, doesn't it? And it hurts." He sounded like he was trying to be sympathetic, but falling slightly short of the mark.

He wasn't wrong, though, and that terrified Sanji.

Sanji hated knowing that the mossy devil knew him on such an intimate level.

Hated that the jackass kept poking and prodding at things he shouldn't.

~~ Hated that he didn't actually hate the bastard. ~~

"...You're not just talking about  _ me, _ though, are you?" Sanji asked, shooting Zoro a significant look.

The demon fell silent, then started chuckling.

"Vous avez raison, bien sûr." He murmured, sounding amused yet rueful as he stared up at the ceiling.

Sanji almost recognized the language, even though he'd never heard it before in his life.

He felt like Zoro was telling him that he was right.

The demon then fell silent, expression going flat and serious.

"Keep a close eye on Robin, cook." He stated, tone just as deadly serious as his expression.

Sanji tensed, frowning as he regarded the swordsman.

"Why?" He asked, "I mean, I will,  _ obviously, _ but why?"

"A storm is coming." Zoro said darkly, "Her desires are twisting. Uncertain." He turned to look Sanji directly in the eye, voice lilting softly and coldly, "Fear and love make people do such  _ foolish _ things."

Sanji understood exactly what Zoro was telling him: Robin was scared, and she loved them, and she was most likely going to do something very, very stupid because of it.

He nodded, serious.

"Understood." He said, "I'll keep an eye on her."

Zoro gave a single sharp nod in response.

They'd both just have to hope it was enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Zoro sings can be found [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rIZDJhq5PA). It's one of my all time favorites, and it's honestly pretty fitting for this version of Zoro, imo!
> 
> The parts Zoro sings translate roughly to:  
> ""Once, I mistook an ocean for a lake" he recited the poem  
> In the depths of that mystery he spent his whole life  
> Under a dark ocean, in the shadows he wanders  
> Forever searching for a way back into the light to his loved one
> 
> Alone, the hero continues his journey deeper into the night  
> That burden on his shoulders, like a promise, always would be  
> In this game this fool is struck down again and again  
> Only a moment of rest in death is given  
> Already called back again"  
> (Thank you to [lyricstranslate.com](https://lyricstranslate.com/en/sankarin-tango-heros-tango.html) for the lyrics and translations!)
> 
> And according to Google Translate, the French Zoro speaks translates to "You're right, of course" or "You are right, of course."  
> (Feel free to correct me if Google Translate got it wrong!)


	27. Oncoming Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Water 7 approaches.

The last thing Zoro expected to see while munching on something the cook made was a giant frog doing the front crawl. He'd freely admit that he gaped when he saw it, almost choking to death in his shock despite not even needing to breathe.

"Oi! There's a giant frog doing the front crawl!" He called back to his nakama after swallowing what was in his mouth.

"Don't be ridiculous, Zoro!" Nami called back, "There's no way something like that exists!"

Luffy, who had immediately gone to Zoro's side at the swordsman's declaration, whooped loudly and laughed.

"It's HUUUUUUUGE!!!!" He cheered, throwing a fist in the air, adding: "Follow that frog!!!!"

 _ **"WHAT?!"**_ Nami screeched, but then they all rushed over to look and, sure enough: Giant frog doing the front crawl.

The cook began muttering about recipes for cooking frogs while Luffy, Usopp, and Chopper chattered excitedly about the fact that such a big frog existed in the first place.

While chasing it, Merry ran aground on something floating in the water, and Zoro cringed internally at the grinding against the bottom of the ship, feeling Merry's soul flicker ominously once again. He laid a reassuring hand on the rail nearest him, unconsciously stroking gently along it, as though trying to soothe the ship.

He was soon pressed into forcing the ship backwards using the oars, and not a moment too soon: There was a _sea train._

It was a marvelous machine, but was quite terrifying to see rush past after just _barely_ missing them.

That could've killed his nakama!!

They met a woman and her granddaughter...and the granddaughter's cat? It looked like a rabbit, but Zoro supposed he wasn't the most knowledgeable about animals, and let it drop.

The woman was far more interesting, anyway: She felt human, and yet… Something about her reminded him of the fishmen, and yet… Didn't.

Similar, yet different.

Fascinating!

She told them about the island of Water 7, and gave them a letter of recommendation to give to a man named "Iceberg."

The others were hopeful that they could fix Merry, but…

Zoro glanced at the ship, feeling the flickering of its soul.

It desired to carry them further. Just a little bit further… but it was so weak, now.

So faint, even as it struggled to shine brighter, becoming increasingly aware.

Zoro... 

Didn't think they'd be able to fix Merry.

Zoro didn't think _anyone_ could fix Merry.

Because Merry was…

Dying.

There was an ache, somewhere deep in his chest, from a sorrow he couldn't quite find it in himself to enjoy.

It tasted so _very_ bitter…

He glanced at Robin, with her conflicted desires, and at Usopp, still clinging to a children's game.

Deep, powerful insecurities festered within them both.

A storm was coming, and Zoro wasn't sure if they could weather it.

\-----

Water 7 was beautiful. Shaped like a gigantic fountain, with clear, clean water running in canals throughout the city like streets. Water shot into the air from the very top, sparkling brilliantly in the sunlight. The city was gorgeous. _Stunning._ And yet…

Zoro couldn't enjoy it.

The storm was drawing closer, and would soon hit.

Zoro could feel it in his soul, echoing like the tune that swelled in his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a short chapter, but I couldn't justify tacking part of the next chapter onto it, because the moods were overall just too different. 
> 
> We've just hit Water 7!
> 
> God help them all.


	28. Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A beautiful city with darkness lurking right beneath the surface.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Zoro being his usual lewd self and death threats

They docked at a hidden harbor, as directed by one of the citizens.

"Zoro, since you're carrying a lot of the gold, you're coming with us!" The witch ordered, "And you'd  _ better _ stick close! I won't have you getting lost on us!" She added, poking a finger right into Zoro's face.

"Tch! Whatever, witch." Zoro scoffed, batting her hand away, "I don't get lost!" He added, crossing his arms and turning away.

The looks everyone shot his way in response to that statement were honestly quite insulting.

"Fuck all of you." He muttered petulantly, scowling darkly.

It was decided that Usopp would stay behind and watch the ship, Luffy coming along with Nami and Zoro as extra protection and carrying power for the money they'd be getting.

Sanji, Chopper, and Robin would be going to search for supplies to restock, plus other things (books, probably).

Zoro shot the cook a significant look before he left, reminding him of what he'd told him a couple nights ago.

The cook's expression tightened momentarily, and he nodded back, a tiny, subtle thing, but firm and determined.

Zoro's expression lightened and he gave a small nod in return.

\-----

The yagara were interesting: Fish that could be ridden on like horses! Fascinating! They jiggled something in the very, very back of his mind. Something about… A lake? A lake monster?

...Eh. It was already gone.

Zoro got the feeling it probably hadn't been very important, anyway.

More importantly, he needed to keep an eye on his captain to make sure he didn't go wandering off and spend all their money on meat, or something. A task made more difficult by the fact that the witch insisted he ride behind her on the other yagara.

He did  _ not _ get lost!

...The world just. Moved around on him.

A lot.

"Oh stop pouting, would ya?" Nami chided him, glancing over her shoulder at him, "Just  _ look _ at this place!!

"I am  _ not _ pouting." He grumbled, glowering at her, arms crossed over his chest.

She stuck her tongue out at him.

"I can think of  _ far _ better uses for that tongue of yours, witch." He sniped with an unfriendly smile, causing her to immediately retract her tongue and scrunch up her nose.

"Ew!" She exclaimed, "Why do you always have to be so gross?"

He just grinned back at her, utterly unrepentant.

Then Nami got catcalled by some man hanging out a window, who was then dragged back in by the woman he lived with. Apparently it was some sort of city custom? Nami still didn't look thrilled.

"Want me to kill him for you?" Zoro asked, thumbing the hilt of one of his swords.

"No! That's completely unnecessary!" Nami insisted immediately.

They ended up dragged on a wild ride through the city by the yagara, only to end up exactly where they needed to go.

Nami punched the yagara for the fright, though.

"Animal abuse, witch?  _ Really?" _ Zoro tutted, shaking his head.

"YOU SHUT UP!!!" She snarled at him, distracted from her apologies to the yagara.

Then Luffy got dragged off to buy meat by his yagara.

And here Zoro'd been concerned about it being his  _ captain _ who was gonna do that.

"Oi! Some pirates started a ruckus at Dock #1!" One man exclaimed.

"What?! Is that true?!" Another asked in response.

"We'd better get there right away!" A third one exclaimed, and a bunch of people began heading off.

They took a water elevator up; it was actually really fucking cool. The whole city was like nothing Zoro had ever encountered before!

...Granted, he couldn't exactly  _ remember _ if he'd ever encountered anything like Water 7 before, but he was still  _ pretty sure _ this island city was unique. Just a feeling he had.

"I wonder what that crowd's about?" Nami wondered as they drew near the shipyard, "Aren't they watching the shipyard?"

"Overheard in the market that some pirates were startin' a ruckus here." Zoro mentioned thoughtfully, watching the crowd with mild interest.

Nami turned back to ask him more, looking interested, but then their captain interrupted.

"Let's go see it! Let's go, yagara!" Luffy cheered, pumping a fist in the air.

The shipwrights were clearing up the remnants of a group of pirates that looked to have been soundly beaten.

"Hey! Look over there! It's Lucci-san! He's so handsome!" One woman commented, and Zoro glanced over.

The man was indeed  _ very _ attractive. A wonderfully symmetrical face, long-ish, soft looking hair that had  _ just _ the right amount of wave and curl to it to show that he carefully groomed and maintained it. His facial hair was both interesting and  _ immaculate, _ adding more proof that he very carefully maintained his appearance.

The pigeon on his shoulder was an interesting choice, though. Was it wearing a tie? That was actually kind of adorable, Zoro couldn't lie.

On the purely physical level, the man was stunningly beautiful.

Spiritually speaking, however, the man was a Monster. His soul was almost  _ tar black _ with sin and corruption. Zoro could practically  _ taste _ all of the disgusting sins the man had committed. They ranged from seducing those already in relationships into committing adultery, to telling malicious lies, to manipulating others, to sabotaging anything and everything that could feasibly be sabotaged, to committing  _ so many murders. _ And  _ most _ of those murders were done in cold blood, too: Both premeditated and done  _ very _ much on purpose and with planning.

Judging from his desires, and how comfortable the man was in his own skin… He considered it all  _ justified, _ too.

He was  _ "Just Doing His Job"  _ and _ "Upholding Justice." _

Even more interesting… He seemed to  _ know _ he was Damned, and accepted it as a necessary evil. Simply part of upholding "Justice."

How very  _ fascinating! _

Zoro could already tell that he'd be  **_Trouble._ **

"Hey, pops." Luffy began in a bright tone of voice, causing the older man in the wildly patterned shirt to turn around.

"Hm?" The man asked.

"Did something happen?" Luffy asked, grinning.

"Yeah, it seems that some pirates caused a ruckus at this here Dock #1." The man answered, confirming Zoro's earlier remark to Nami, "But, well, it ended when the craftsmen knocked them down. There's no end to those fools."

"Shipwrights beat pirates up?" Luffy asked, smile falling into confusion.

"Oh, you must be a voyager." The man realized, smiling in a friendly manner, "The crowd is… Well, in short, busybodies." The man turned more towards the dock, "Those shipwrights at the Galley-La Company are admired by all the residents. They're strong… and skilled. They're the pride of Water Seven!"

Zoro noticed a man high up on some scaffolding, wielding a gigantic saw on a long pole that was as big as he was. He was handling it near  _ effortlessly, _ and Zoro  _ very much appreciated _ the immense level of strength and skill it took to make such a difficult task look so easy.

The man's eyes met Zoro's by chance, and Zoro felt the man's desire spike slightly as he looked at him. Zoro couldn't help the lazy, predatory grin that curled on his face at the revelation that he was, apparently,  _ exactly _ that man's Type.

The man's interest spiked further, but eye contact was lost as the man returned to his job, and the issue was shelved for the time being.

_ "Purr~..." _ Zoro rumbled softly, admiring the darkness of the man's soul and the clear skill he had with his hands and body. His soul was  _ almost _ as dark as that Lucci fellow's, but not quite as... _ Severe. _ Not as starkly black and white with the pursuit of "Justice."

Not quite so  _ twisted. _

He'd be Trouble, Zoro knew, but not as  _ much _ Trouble as Lucci.

And  _ this one's _ desires, at least, went Zoro's way.

Zoro wanted to play with him.

Zoro wanted to play with him  **_very much._ **

"Wow, I'm looking forward to meeting them!" Zoro's captain said in response to the old man's words about the shipwrights, drawing Zoro's mind away from all the sinful,  _ terrible _ things he wanted to do to that man and back into the present.

"Hey, Luffy!" Nami interrupted, as Zoro gently let the bag of treasure he was carrying rest upon the ground as he waited for a decision on what they were doing.

"Eh?" Luffy asked, turning around.

"Let's hurry and go to the money-changing shop. We can come back here later." Nami suggested.

"Okay!" Luffy agreed with a smile that brought a faint smile to Zoro's lips, as well.

Who gave his captain the right to be  _ that _ fucking cute??

\-----

They arrived at the financial section of the city, and strode into the bank, quickly being ushered into a private room in the back for an appraisal of the treasure, the teller at the front freaking out upon seeing the contents of the bag they were carrying with them.

They were brought to the VIP room… It was very… What was the word? Ah, yes:  _ Swanky. _

"Wow…. This is comfy!" Luffy exclaimed, bouncing joyfully on the couch cushion between Nami and Zoro.

Nami sat primly upon the couch, looking very professional, a terrifyingly focused expression on her face, her eyes closed.

Zoro, by contrast, sat lounged back with his legs spread, arms resting across the back of the couch as he stared at the man like a tiger waiting to pounce, smirking faintly. His hungry gaze never left the appraiser.

The man was sweating nervously as he examined the gold, his eyes wide. He'd started sweating even  _ harder _ when Zoro produced the massive chunk of pure gold he'd taken with him (and oh, what a mixed curse it was to have finally removed it from that pocket dimension!).

The man desired very much to  _ not _ pay them what the gold was worth

How very  _ businessman _ of him. Zoro's shark-like grin widened, and the man began to sweat harder. 

Zoro slid his arms off the couch back and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, hands casually clasped together, eyes falling half-lidded.

"Now, you're not gonna try and tell us these are all fake, are ya?" He asked, voice a sensual purr filled with dark intent. He made sure to ooze a bit of threat and bloodlust while idly fingering Yubashiri's hilt, just for added effect.

The man sweated even harder.

"F-far from it!" The man sputtered, "I've been an appraiser for 25 years."

Nami waited patiently for the man's quote, her eyes closed and a stern frown on her face.

"This is roughly estimated at…"

**_"TH-THREE HUNDRED MILLION BERRIES?!"_ ** Luffy's voice  _ very loudly _ rang out, practically shaking the building from the sheer volume level.

Zoro smacked him upside the head.

"Idiot. Don't be so loud!" He shot his captain a warning look, "You'll attract all the wrong sorts of attention!"

"Y-y-you're gonna give us that much money?!" Luffy stammered, still speaking  _ far _ too loudly.

Zoro clapped one hand under his captain's jaw and the other atop his head, and pressed his hands together, forcing Luffy's jaw shut.

"I said  _ be quiet, _ Captain." He hissed, glaring.

"This is indeed worth that much." The appraiser said, still sweating, but looking more reassured at Luffy's reaction, "This is wonderful gold, taking its historical value and purity into account."

"With that much money, we can fix the Merry good!" Luffy said, once Zoro released him. He was visibly delighted, "Then, we'll spend the rest of the money to buy a bronze statue!" He said, excitedly spreading his arms.

"No." Zoro stated flatly, arms crossed over his chest.

"If you accept that amount, please sign and put your thumbprint here." The man looked  _ eager, _ and Zoro felt his desires, and placed one hand on his captain's shoulder to hold him in check. The man held out some papers, "I'll go prepare the money immediately."

Zoro suspiciously narrowed his eyes at the appraiser.

"Okay! I'll put as many thumbprints as you want!" Luffy exclaimed, and Zoro's grip tightened, holding his captain in place.

Nami's leg smashed down on the paperwork, her expression thunderous, even as she rested her chin on one hand, facing away from the man.

"What? What's the matter, Nami?" Luffy asked, clueless as to the appraiser's intentions.

"There's three things I want to say, Mr. Appraiser." Nami stated, voice cold, her eyes shadowed, "First, I forgot to tell you, but this guy's got a hundred million bounty on his head," She said, pulling Luffy close by the back of his shirt, then jabbing a thumb towards Zoro, adding: "And the other has a sixty million bounty on  _ his _ head."

Zoro leered hungrily at the man, smiling with far too many teeth.

"Second…" Nami said, releasing Luffy, "I don't accept the appraisal you've just given us. Third… If you lie to us again, I'll let my friend play with you." She finally cracked open one eye, shooting the man a  _ delightfully _ terrifying expression of icy contempt that bordered lightly on being downright  _ murderous. _

"Oh~?" Zoro asked, perking up and turning to Nami, "Truly? You would give me this man's soul?"

"If he lies to us again, he's all yours, Zoro." Nami agreed.

Zoro's grin grew.

"You  _ do _ love me!" He crooned to her before turning a truly  _ predatory _ look towards the man, who looked even  _ more _ terrified than before. His eyes were dark and hungry as he stared the appraiser down.

He really,  _ really _ hoped the man tried to lie again~.

_**"I… I'M SORRY!!!"** _The man exclaimed, terrified out of his mind.

They walked out of the building five hundred million berries richer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wasn't originally gonna post this chapter up today, but... It's Thanksgiving, so this is me, giving to all of you lovely people! 
> 
> I hope you all stay safe and have a wonderful day!!


	29. Kaku

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zoro has a Type.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Vague references to sexual activities and implications of Zoro flirting with a minor

After leaving the bank, Nami had Luffy and Zoro carrying two briefcases of cash each while she carried the final one. Luffy was swinging around the one he held in his left hand, and nearly lost it into the river after it flew off when he lost his grip on it. Luffy caught it just before it hit the water… but not before Nami went diving in, after putting down her own briefcase, intending to catch the one that had gone flying.

Zoro, choosing to trust his captain, hadn't moved an inch, and was proven right in his course of action, so he just snickered at the witch, and then _relished_ in the pain she inflicted upon him with her punches.

"You're such a tease, witch~." Zoro hummed as he followed after her.

She just sighed irritably and shook her head, eyebrow twitching.

"I should really remember not to bother hitting you; you probably consider it a _reward,_ you sicko." She grumbled.

Zoro just snickered unrepentantly in response, grinning wickedly.

One their way back to the shipyard, Nami talked about how they'd probably need to return to the Merry right away after getting a shipwright, so as to assess the repair fee.

Zoro didn't know how to tell them that there was no point, because there was no way to repair Merry. He didn't know what was wrong with the ship, but he knew what dying souls looked like, and Merry… was definitely dying.

But how could Zoro tell his nakama that, when he didn't have any idea _why_ Merry was dying? How could he tell them that Merry couldn't be fixed, when he didn't even know what was wrong?

It was always possible that he was wrong ~~he _hoped_ he was wrong~~ after all.

~~He knew he wasn't.~~

They reached their destination.

"We're back at the entrance to the shipyard." Luffy stated, looking around with childish excitement.

"Crowd's gone, too." Zoro noted, taking a far more casual look around. 

"Anyway, let's find… Ehhh… What's his name again?" Luffy asked, looking lost.

"Iceberg-san." Nami answered promptly.

"Right, that's it! Ice-pops!" Luffy exclaimed, beaming proudly.

Zoro and Nami deadpanned at Luffy.

"I wonder who he is?" Nami mused, glancing at the shipyard, "I wonder if it's alright to go in?"

"I'm coming in!" Luffy announced as he started stepping over the fence.

"Not again…" Nami muttered

The saw-wielding man from earlier suddenly appeared where Luffy was, and pushed him back with one finger to Luffy's forehead. Zoro purred internally at the casual display of speed and strength.

He _loved_ strong men~.

"Hold it!" The man - _'Kaku'_ \- said.

"Hm?" Luffy asked, surprised.

"Wait." Kaku continued, "You're an outsider, aren't you? Let's talk outside for now."

He leaned back and smiled slightly.

"Only authorized people can go inside the plant." He explained, causing Luffy and Nami to rear back, looking shocked.

"Heave-ho." Kaku said as he stepped over the fence. He stood before them, hands on his hips, a dirty cloth held in one hand, "Do you have some business at this dock?" He asked as he tucked the rag into his toolbelt.

"Oh, it's Usopp!" Luffy exclaimed, grinning.

Zoro smacked him upside the head.

"That is _clearly_ not Usopp, idiot." He said, a bit sharply, though he was _far_ more interested in staring at the man before him.

He seemed all bright, shiny, and warm on the surface, but underneath… Oh, he was _deliciously_ dark~. Zoro wanted to touch and play with that darkness.

"Yeah, he's square-ish!" Nami added, still gaping at Kaku, "Which means he's square Usopp!"

Zoro gave her a sour look, too, but quickly refocused on the shipwright.

His hands were calloused and steady, too: Obvious worker's hands. Though some of the callouses matched those on Zoro's hands, causing him to wonder if this shipwright was also a swordsman.

If so… Then Zoro wanted to play with him _even more._

"He's not Usopp in _any_ way…" He purred, eyes falling half-lidded as he gave the man a once over, getting a soft, polite laugh in response.

Zoro could feel that the shipwright's desires aligned rather nicely with his own, now if only he could...

But Nami chose that moment to jolt out of her shock.

"Oh yeah! Um… We'd like to see Iceberg-san." She said, and Zoro sighed internally, disappointed.

"Hm? Iceberg-san? Are you a customer?" Kaku asked, still smiling.

Nami handed him the letter that Granny Kokoro had handed them.

"Oh, I see." He said after reading it, "This is a reference letter from Granny Kokoro at the Shift Station, huh?"

"Hm? You talk like Zoro does sometimes! Are you an old guy too?" Luffy asked, leaning over sideways while peering at Kaku.

"Oi." Zoro said in protest, not _really_ caring. 

"I'm 23." Kaku answered promptly.

"Oh~?" Zoro asked, eyes glinting with interest. A perfect age for seducing!

 _"Zoro,_ no." Nami warned, shooting him a sharp look.

"Zoro, _yes."_ Zoro disagreed, a small but eager grin spreading across his lips. 

Nami yanked him down to her level, glaring at him.

"Do _not_ mess up our chances by flirting with the nice shipwright!" She hissed in his ear, "'Cause if you mess this up, I _will_ find a way to hurt you that you _won't_ enjoy! _Got it?"_

Zoro looked at her from the corner of his eye, smirking slyly.

"You _promise?"_ He asked playfully, getting an even harsher glare in response, so he answered more seriously: "I'm not gonna ruin anything; just calm down, will you?"

"You'd _better_ not." She warned again, finally releasing him.

He straightened his spine, idly rubbing behind the ear she'd been hissing into. How could he possibly ruin things by flirting when this man **_wanted_ ** him? Stupid witch...

"Are you two alright?" Kaku asked, looking politely concerned.

"Oh, don't worry! We're fine!" Nami assured him with a smile, waving off the concern, "Just reminding my friend here not to wander off!"

"Ah, alright then." Kaku said simply, still smiling. He still felt very interested in what Zoro and Nami had talked about, though.

"So… Do you know this Iceberg person?" Nami asked, trying to get things back on track.

"Know him? Well, Iceberg-san is the mayor of Water 7." Kaku answered thoughtfully. 

"Whoa… So he's that high up?" Luffy said, looking astounded.

"Not only is he the mayor, he's the president of our company, Gally-La Company, and he also manages the sea train." Kaku elaborated, sounding a little bit proud.

"So he's the most powerful guy in town, huh?" Zoro asked, mildly intrigued.

"Well, in Water 7, there's no one who doesn't know him." Kaku answered.

"Where do we have to go to meet him?" Nami asked.

"Hmm, I wonder where he is right now." Kaku mused, "He can be hard to find, since he's a very busy person."

"Oh? Can't you get in touch with him, or something?" Nami asked plaintively, leaning forward.

"That's probably possible, but… Are you in a hurry?" Kaku asked.

"It's not that we're in a hurry, but…" Nami answered hesitantly.

Kaku laughed goodnaturedly.

"In short, you want to talk about having your ship repaired, right?" He asked, setting down his tools.

Zoro watched closely as the man began to stretch, purring internally at the casual show of flexibility and athletic skill.

"Where did you anchor your ship?" Kaku asked while stretching.

"Uh, a rocky cape." Nami answered, a bit confused as to what the shipwright was doing.

"Well then, I'll go run and check on the condition of your ship." Kaku stated simply, "It'll save some time when you see Iceberg-san. You can talk about the repair fee, too."

""Go run"...? On a yagara bull?" Nami asked, perplexed.

Kaku chuckled at that, like she'd told a particularly funny joke.

"If I do that, you'll grow tired of waiting. Well, just wait for ten minutes." He told them, sounding amused, grinning as he stood up from retying his shoes.

"Ten minutes?" Nami asked, more than a little incredulous.

Zoro crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head slightly, eyebrows rising just a bit in interest. He could tell from the calm steadiness of the man's soul that he was being quite literal about what he'd said.

"That's right, ten minutes." Kaku confirmed, starting to get into a ready position, before pausing and glancing towards Zoro. "Oh, before that, though," He turned more fully towards Zoro, "Are you free tonight, by any chance?" He asked, grinning hopefully.

Zoro's eyebrows rose further, a small grin appearing, displaying just a hint of teeth.

"Oh? That's rather forward of you." He noted out loud, inwardly cackling at the touch of pink that appeared across the bridge of the man's strikingly square nose.

Kaku laughed a bit bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Yes, I suppose it is, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to try my luck." He said, "Between those swords and your striking features, you're quite eye catching."

"Oh, you _flatter_ me." Zoro purred, eyes falling half-lidded in response to the genuine praise, smirk becoming a touch warmer and less predatory.

Kaku laughed again.

"Is it really flattery if it's true?" He asked playfully with an easygoing grin.

"Yes." Zoro answered promptly with a grin of his own, tone still closer to a purr than not, "But I certainly don't mind when handsome men give me compliments."

Kaku's blush darkened a bit, and his grin turned a little more confident now he knew for sure he wasn't barking up the wrong tree.

Zoro decided to hammer the final nail into the coffin, and leaned forward slightly after stepping further into the man's space, a sultry smile on his lips.

"I'd look even more striking in your bed." He purred directly into the man's ear, voice throaty.

The blush he received in response was _spectacular,_ and the intense burst of _desire_ Zoro detected in response to the roundabout offer was extremely gratifying to Zoro's ego.

 **_"Oh._ ** Heh. So uh, that's a yes to dinner, then?" Kaku asked, grinning a bit bashfully, face brilliantly red.

"Oh, _yes,_ " Zoro agreed silkily, dipping his head in a shallow nod, "And _more,_ if you play your cards right... I _love_ a man who's skilled with his hands~."

" _Oh!_ Hehe, well, I'd like to think I'm pretty good with my hands." Kaku said, grinning a little and rubbing the back of his neck, "Anyway, I should go take a look at your ship."

He got into a ready position, crouched down on the ground, and then he was _sprinting,_ moving at a truly impressive speed.

 _"Whoa!"_ Luffy exclaimed at the sight, eyes going wide as he held his hat down on his head with one hand so it wasn't blown away by the wind Kaku's sprinting kicked up, "He's fast!"

Kaku leapt up onto the top of the very tall door to the dock in a single bound, and then off. That was _impressive~._

Zoro wondered if the man was showing off for him as some sort of courtship display.

If so, it was working _quite well~._

"Ahhhhh! He jumped!" Luffy exclaimed, shocked.

"What… but wait! Over there is…" Nami realized, looking concerned.

"A precipice!" Nami and Luffy chorused, sounding terrified.

 **_"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"_ ** Nami screeched shrilly as Luffy shouted, _"HE FELL!!"_

They raced to the edge, watching the man free fall, arms and legs splayed.

They could hear Kaku's joyous laugh carried back to them on the wind.

 _"Amazing!"_ Luffy exclaimed, shocked and awed.

"Is he okay?!" Nami asked, alarmed.

"He runs freely in town." A deep, masculine voice said from behind them.

"What?" Nami asked, turning around.

"Eh?" Luffy asked, turning around a second later.

Zoro chose to keep watching Kaku; the man behind them was no threat to any of them.

"People call him the "Mountain Wind." He's a shipwright foreman of Galley-La Company's Dock #1..."

"Oh, _purr~~."_ Zoro crooned, watching Kaku effortlessly land on his feet upon the roof of a building before beginning to leap across the rooftops. It was really quite impressive.

"His name is Kaku." The man describing Kaku finished.

"And I have a date with him tonight." Zoro said smugly to himself, looking like a cat that caught the canary.

"Zoro… Why are you even interested in him?" Nami asked, rubbing her temples in exasperation.

"Why would I _not_ be interested in a man who can do **_that?_ ** _"_ Zoro countered, motioning towards Kaku's retreating figure, still looking very smug. 

"Luffy can do that, and you don't-"

Zoro pointedly cleared his throat, interrupting her. He arched one eyebrow to shoot her a deeply unimpressed look.

Nami facepalmed.

"...Right. You _do_ flirt with Luffy." She recalled, sounding so _very_ done, "You have no standards at all, do you?"

 _"You're_ one to talk, miss "almost went off with a serial killer because she was pretty."" Zoro snarked back with a roll of his eyes.

The witch flushed slightly.

"Listen…! She looked like she needed help, and-" She began in a low voice.

"-You were lookin' to score some points, hopin' t'spend the night in her bed. I get'cha." Zoro said with a smirk and a nod, arms crossed over his chest.

Nami flushed darker.

"You don't have to phrase it like _that,_ y'know…!" She protested.

"I'm not wrong, though!" Zoro said with a laugh, receiving an aggravated sigh in response.

"Look. It _didn't happen,_ so can we just _drop it already?"_ She hissed at him, mortified.

Zoro snickered, but nodded.

"Alright, alright. You let me get on with _my_ business, I'll let you get on with yours. Deal?" He offered his hand to her.

She accepted.

"Deal." And then she paused, nose scrunching as a thought occurred to her, "Ugh. I just _literally_ made a deal with the devil."

Zoro threw his head back and _laughed._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This pairing kinda snuck up on me, but y'know what? I actually kinda love it.  
> I love how I'm writing Kaku's interactions with Zoro.  
> I love one (1) square boi.


	30. Shenanigans While Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why is Zoro cursed to be surrounded by idiots?

Luffy, having ignored Nami and Zoro's byplay, was still hung up on Kaku's incredible display of speed and agility, and exclaimed in shock over it.

"Well… Don't make light of my craftsmen." Iceberg - though he had not yet introduced himself - said in response to that surprise.

"Come to think of it… Who's this guy?" Luffy asked leaning over towards Zoro to ask that question.

"Iceberg." Zoro stated simply, arms once more crossed over his chest.

"Ehhhhh? Really?" Luffy asked, eyes wide.

Zoro nodded with a grunt.

"In order to build a faster, stronger ship quickly, an ordinary physical ability isn't enough." Iceberg continued, apparently ignoring Luffy's question and Zoro's answer, then turned to the objectively very beautiful woman standing next to him, "By the way, Kalifa…"   
  
"Yes, I've already checked." The woman began, adjusting her glasses. Zoro rather liked her boots.

She, too, was  _ deliciously _ dark beneath that unassuming exterior...and her ultimate desire was completion of the mission she'd been given, much like with Lucci and Kaku. How very  _ interesting. _

Zoro kept his face perfectly neutral, keeping his growing suspicions to himself.

"Strawhat Luffy, Pirate Hunter Zoro, Nico Robin…"

Iceberg's eyes widened slightly at Robin's name. Clearly, he recognized her. His desires twisted up, desire to know warring with desire to put an end to what he perceived as a threat. Zoro got the sense that Iceberg didn't consider Robin a threat for the  _ conventional _ reasons...

Wasn't it illegal to know the language of the Poneglyphs? Zoro believed he recalled hearing something to that effect.

_ And _ Robin's dream was to uncover the lost history of the world…

And she was given a massive bounty when she was only  _ eight... _

**_Well._ ** If Zoro was putting all of those pieces together in the right order, then it was painting a rather ugly picture about why the World Government was so afraid of her.

How very  _ typical _ of governments to want to cover up their  _ nasty, dirty secrets. _

The storm was growing closer, and it was getting  _ bigger by the second. _

Zoro could  _ feel it. _

It was  _ so close to hitting. _

"Their group has those three members with bounties on their heads." Kalifa continued reciting from her book, "Their total bounty is two hundred and thirty-nine million Berries. It was formed in the East Blue. They're the Strawhat Pirates, and they currently have seven crewmembers."

"I see. I'm glad you came." Iceberg said softly, a small frown on his face, "As he mentioned, I'm Iceberg, the boss of this city." A cheeping came from the mouse in the pocket of Iceberg's shirt, and he reached up to pet the mouse's head with a finger, "And this is a mouse I found earlier. His name is… Let's see… Tyrannosaurus."

Zoro blinked.

That was a wonderfully ironic name for a mouse. He couldn't help but approve.

"I have to prepare his food and cage." Iceberg noted to himself.

"I've already taken care of them, Iceberg-san." Kalifa informed him promptly.

Iceberg turned around, shocked.

"Well, that's my Kalifa!" He said, visibly stunned.

"Thank you." The woman said in a perfectly professional voice, adjusting her glasses once more, "More importantly, you're dining with an executive from a glassware factory at the hotel in Chiza in ten minutes. After that, you'll give a talk at the Liguria Square. When that's done, a conference with Mr. Bimine, the mayor of the gourmet town Pucci. You'll also be interviewed by a newspaper company there. After that, please go back to the main office and go through some documents."

That was… A  _ lot. _

Iceberg clearly agreed, as his face went completely deadpan.

"I don't want to!" He exclaimed, and Tyrannosaurus cheeped once more, as though in agreement.

"Well then, I'll cancel them all." Kalifa said simply.

"Is that really okay?" Nami wondered out loud.

"I'm someone powerful enough to do things like that." Iceberg said simply.

Ooooooh~ how  _ delightfully _ self-absorbed!

"What a selfish guy you are!" Luffy said, frowning slightly before leaning towards Nami, "But isn't this guy the one that granny was talking about?" He asked, pointing at Iceberg.

"Yeah, he's "that guy."" Nami agreed, smiling slightly.

"How insolent!" Kalifa exclaimed, leaping forward and kicking the shit out of all three of them and sending a couple of the briefcases of money flying.

Zoro noticed immediately and went after it. His captain could take care of himself, if he needed to; it was more important that Zoro keep an eye on that money. He could  _ sense _ the souls creeping nearby, looking for a chance to grab it all.

The fact that the secretary had even kicked Iceberg in her fury was even less important.

Zoro saw some oddly-dressed men trying to take the money, and grinned cruelly, popping Sandai Kitetsu just an inch out of its sheath with his thumb, the quiet "click" making the men sweat.

"Do you want to play with me?" Zoro asked, tilting his head to one side with a blatantly predatory look on his face, "Because I  _ really _ want to play with  _ you…" _

They prepared to fight...only to be tied up with ropes by a blond man wearing goggles. Zoro pouted and pressed Sandai Kitetsu back into its sheath. The sword felt disappointed, too, rattling unhappily.

Such a lost opportunity for blood and suffering...

How vexing.

The man almost went to make off with the money, too...only to be stopped by Lucci, who grabbed and twisted his ear.

Zoro kept his expression carefully neutral while observing Lucci, who was… Speaking through his pigeon while chiding Paulie on not paying his debts with other people's money? Weird flex, but alright.

"Oh good! The money is safe!" Luffy exclaimed cheerfully.

"You talk like it was someone else's problem." Zoro said coldly, grabbing one half of his captain's face and  _ pulling, _ stretching it dramatically while Nami grabbed the other side of Luffy's face and did the same.

"That's right!" She exclaimed, "Why the hell weren't you the first one to go get it back?!"

"Because Zoro had it handled!" Luffy protested.

"Well… I'm sorry." Iceberg said, referencing Paulie's behavior, "Please let us take care of our idiot coworker, as if you guys were to capture him, it would create bitter feelings."

"Well, please excuse him. Consider it good that the money wasn't stolen by the Franky Family." Kalifa added.

"Well, that's true, but…" Nami began.

"Yeah, that's true! That's true!" Luffy agreed, voice muffled by how it had been stretched.

In unison, Zoro and Nami stretched his face further and then let go of his face all at once, causing his skin to snap back into place and knock him over.

"Say… Who were those weird looking guys earlier?" Nami asked, looking concerned as she held onto one of the briefcases of money.

Kalifa began explaining the Franky Family, and Zoro tuned out the explanation in favor of watching what the two shipwrights were going to do.

"Whatever you do, don't underestimate the family's boss, Franky, who's behind them." Iceberg cautioned.

Zoro sighed internally.

How many  _ more _ things were gonna be added into this oncoming storm?! It was starting to get ridiculous!

"We brought him over, Iceberg-san!" Lucci said through the pigeon, his face completely blank.

Zoro had to admit: That was an  _ immaculately _ trained pigeon.  _ Remarkably _ expressive.

He pointedly ignored the man complaining about Lucci's grip on his ear; the man was  _ clearly _ a wuss if that's all it took to bring him down.

"Thanks, Lucci." Iceberg said, also ignoring Paulie.

"We're sorry that that idiot caused you trouble." Was the pigeon  _ frowning? _ By all things unholy, it  _ was! _ Absolutely remarkable!

"Ahh! He spoke again!!" Luffy exclaimed, shocked.

Lucci tossed Paulie unceremoniously to the ground.

"Now, apologize to them, Paulie!" The pigeon was frowning, and Lucci himself had an icy expression of disdain on his face. His overall  _ coldness _ nearly gave  _ Zoro _ chills. It was  _ delightful. _

Lucci tossed the briefcases unceremoniously atop Paulie.

Oh, yes, he would  **_definitely_ ** be Trouble.

"That pigeon is doing all the talking!" Zoro's lovable-but-dumb captain exclaimed.

Zoro fought the urge to facepalm, though he did have to admit that the level of skill used in the ventriloquist act was genuinely impressive.

"Are you the owner of this money? I picked it up for you." Paulie said, setting the briefcases by Luffy.

"Oh, thank you!" Luffy exclaimed, grinning.

"If you wanna thank me, give me 10%." Paulie said seriously, grabbing Luffy by both shoulders.

Zoro side eyed him harshly, hand on Wado Ichimonji's hilt.

Lucci smacked him upside the head with a clearly very heavy hammer before Zoro could do more than  _ contemplate _ maiming the man who dared to lay a hand on his captain.

He was getting real sick of these shipwrights ending the fights for him.

Paulie and Lucci got into a fight.

Paulie, apparently, fought with ropes.

"...Hot." Zoro somewhat reluctantly remarked, getting a  _ deeply _ unimpressed look from Nami.

_ "Stop _ flirting with the shipwrights."

"Don't worry: I have no interest in the one who laid his hands on our captain." Zoro stated flatly, glowering in the direction of the two shipwrights.

Lucci was  _ genuinely _ impressively strong.

Zoro mentally upped the man's threat level as a result.

"Hey! You with the goggles!" Luffy exclaimed, stepping forward, "Hey, think about it carefully."

If Zoro didn't know his captain better, he'd almost expect that he was about to say something profound.

"The one who mocked or provoked you was that pigeon!"

Yup. Zoro knew it.

Why was he following this idiot again?

Oh right. The kid made a deal with him.

Dammit.

"That's fine! The one who hit me was Lucci!" Paulie replied, a comical look of anger on his face.

"Oh my god…" Nami murmured.

"...They're both idiots." Zoro finished, just as deadpan.

"The pigeon can't hit you himself, so he had that guy hit you!" Luffy retorted, hands on his hips, turning his attention onto the pigeon flying around, "Oi, pigeon! If you wanna fight, fight yourself!"

Zoro and Nami both facepalmed in perfect unison, their eyebrows  _ also _ twitching in unison.

"Say something!" Luffy shouted...at the pigeon.

Lucci heaved himself out of the ground with the one hand that was gripping it, the pigeon coming to land on his shoulder once again, "Coo coo!"

"Oh? You wanna fight? Bring it on, you bastard!" Paulie said, turning towards Lucci and starting to step forward in an exaggeratedly aggressive way, rolling up his sleeves.

"Stop it, Paulie." Iceberg said calmly.

"Coo coo! Well, sorry for the fuss." Lucci apologized through the pigeon, though he wasn't sorry at all, "I'm Rob L…" The pigeon stopped, somehow managing to look  _ EMBARRASSED, _ "No, I mean, Hattori the pigeon. This is Rob Lucci." The pigeon explained, motioning one wing to Lucci, "He works here. Nice to meet you. Coo coo!" The pigeon finished up with a polite bow.

That was the most well-trained pigeon Zoro had  _ ever _ seen in his life. However fucking long that life happened to be, 'cause Zoro honestly had no idea.

"Oh? He almost introduced himself as if he were human!" Nami said softly, amazed.

"That's the best trained pigeon I've ever seen in my life." Zoro remarked out loud, honestly just as amazed.

**_"AHA!_** _YEAH, I GOT IT!_ That's ventriloquism, isn't it?!" Nami exclaimed loudly, looking thrilled to pieces that she'd figured it out.

Zoro's eye twitched once.

Nami was supposed to be one of the  _ smart _ ones…

"How is it that I can't remember  _ shit _ and yet I figured that out before you?" He muttered, ruffling his own hair.

**_"WHOA! SERIOUSLY?!_ ** Then it  _ was _ you who was complaining!" Luffy exclaimed, applauding. He was so utterly shocked and amazed.

Why was Zoro cursed to be surrounded by idiots?

"Stop it. It's no big deal. Coo coo." Lucci said through Hattori, raising his arms in a mimicry of what the pigeon was doing.

Zoro was  _ so done _ with all of this. He just wanted to get out of here and go on that date with Kaku. He mentally tuned out of the rest of the conversation…   


Or he would have, but then Paulie started yelling and pointed at Nami, face suddenly bright red.

"WAIT A SEC! WHAT'S WRONG WITH THAT WOMAN?!"

"Wh-what?" Nami asked.

"Oi, stop being a prude. She's dressed fine." Zoro drawled, cleaning his ear with one finger.

_"SHE IS NOT DRESSED FINE! SHE'S **SHAMELESS!!!** "_ Paulie exclaimed, looking outraged, "YOU'RE SHOWING YOUR LEGS TOO MUCH!" He told Nami.

"The only one acting shamefully here is you." Zoro deadpanned before turning to Kalifa, "How do you handle being surrounded by all these idiots?"

Nami turned on Zoro and smacked him upside the head, sending him crashing to the ground.

_**"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT FROM YOU!!!"**_ She raged, realizing he'd been calling her an idiot in a roundabout way.

"The only shameless you are is a shameless  _ tease!" _ Zoro said from the ground.

"Shut up!" Nami shot back, holding up one fist.

"This is a workplace for men!" Paulie continued, ignoring the byplay, "Look how you're dressed!"

"...Is he seriously about to play the "you're asking for it, dressing like that" card?  _ Pathetic." _ Zoro muttered as he stood up, brushing himself off. "Bet he believes in the friendzone, too." He added in a truly scathing tone of voice, "Fucking loser."

"Now, Paulie, calm down." Kalifa said soothingly, holding her free hand up in a placating gesture.

"You, too, Kalifa!!!" He exclaimed, glancing down at her exposed legs.

"Fucking pervert." Zoro deadpanned,  _ deeply _ unimpressed, "Why are straight men so fucking stupid?"

Nami sighed, rubbing her temples.

"I wonder that myself every single day…" She muttered.

After further stupidity, they  _ finally _ entered the shipyard.

Zoro tuned out most of the talking, tuning in just long enough to overhear Iceberg telling Luffy that if he found anyone willing to go with, he was allowed to headhunt them as a crewmember.

Luffy asked Iceberg to join, and was rejected.

Then Iceberg asked about Robin. Luffy missed the mood, but Zoro didn't.

That was going to be Trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of levity before the first part of the Really Bad News!


	31. The Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And so it begins...

Kaku returned, and Zoro could already tell that the news he brought was not good.

"Hm? Kaku? Where have you been?" Paulie asked.

"An assessment." Kaku answered.

"Ah! You're the guy from earlier! So you checked our ship?" Nami asked, grinning excitedly.

Zoro felt the bottom of his stomach drop out at her hope. It was deliciously agonizing.

"Yeah, I did." Kaku answered before turning to Iceberg, "So you were here, Iceberg-san."

"I know the situation. How was it?" Iceberg asked seriously.

"Well…" Kaku began, hesitant.

"Luffy! Come down now!" Nami called up to their captain, causing the boy to jump down from where he'd been standing high up on the scaffolding.

Zoro stood with the money, two briefcases in each hand. He set them on the ground by his feet, where he'd notice instantly if someone tried to snatch them.

"So how much does it look like it'll cost?" Luffy asked, expression bright and hopeful, patting each of the briefcases in turn, "We can pay as much as you like! We've got tons of money!"

Kaku sat down on some logs, looking pensive.

"If possible, I'd like her to be stronger, have more cannons, and faster!" Luffy continued.

"Can you also add pretty decorations on the outer panels?" Nami asked, "Can you renovate inside, as well?"

"Also, I want a bronze statue!" Luffy added, "I want it to be as huge as possible!"

Zoro remained silent, arms crossed over his chest, expression somber.

"Well, hold on a sec…" Kaku finally spoke up, eyes still shadowed by his cap.

Nami and Luffy both paused, faces falling slightly.

Zoro remained impassive, waiting.

"You've been having some tremendous journeys, haven't you?" Kaku asked.

"Oh yeah! We flew into the sky, and fell as well!" Luffy answered excitedly, "We climbed a mountain and got skewered! We've gone through quite a bit! So we'd like to have her fixed good!"

There was a long beat of silence.

Luffy frowned.

"I'm not lying, y'know."

"I believe it." Kaku said, tone somber.

"Hm?" Luffy asked.

"Her scars from battle are too deep." Kaku said, turning towards them. He was not smiling.

_ 'Here it comes.' _ Zoro thought to himself, frown deepening as he dug his nails into his biceps,  _ 'The start of the storm.' _

"Do you mean it'll take a long time to fix her?" Nami asked, still not quite grasping the situation.

"No…" Kaku said, soft and serious, "Frankly speaking, your ship...can no longer be fixed, even with our skills."

_ 'And so it begins.' _ Zoro hissed internally.

"Is her keel damaged, or something?" Paulie asked, sitting down on the logs as well.

"Yeah, it's taken a lot of damage." Kaku confirmed.

"Oh no…" Nami breathed, stepping forward and speaking more loudly and desperately, "But we've been traveling just fine up until today!"

"Let's suppose that we did what we could anyway." Kaku began, "The probability of her reaching the next island is…"

Luffy gulped loudly.

"...Zero." Kaku finished.

Zoro felt the jolt that went through Nami and his captain down into the deepest depths of his soul, and his grimace deepened.

He was not surprised, however.

The denials came fast and furious from Zoro's captain.

Asking if they could replace her keel, or build a ship exactly like the Going Merry.

Lucci shut down the second idea, and Zoro couldn't help but throw his own two bits in.

"It would be an insult to Merry's memory if we did that." He stated coldly, interrupting Lucci's explanation, "And it wouldn't have the same soul."

That shut that line of thought down fast.

Luffy denied the idea of changing ships.

"Then I guess I get your soul sooner than expected, Captain." Zoro said, voice cold, "Because Merry  _ is _ dying."

Luffy and Nami turned to Zoro, looking betrayed.

He stared back at them, expression impassive.

"The Going Merry is dying." He repeated, "It's your choice what to do from there, Captain." With that, he turned away.

Iceberg had Kalifa offer them a ship catalog.

Lulu came up, speaking of a government official, and Zoro had to hide behind some logs with his crewmates. He sighed internally, wondering when he'd get a chance to hash out the details of his date with Kaku.

This oncoming storm was really putting a crimp in his sex life.

Zoro had to suppress a snicker at the official's name.

Corgy? Like the really short-legged dog?

Heh. Government dog…

A smirk appeared on his face.

Iceberg got led off by the government dog.

Zoro yawned and stepped out of hiding, feeling Kaku's eyes on him immediately... and feeling Lucci's disgruntlement about that fact.

He very purposefully stretched sensuously, just to feel the filthy desires of Kaku (and more than a few others) upon seeing his muscles ripple beneath his skin. He shot the man a knowing smirk, getting a faint blush.

"Oh, I never introduced myself, did I?" Zoro realized belated, turning to Kaku and holding out a hand with a faint smirk, "Roronoa Zoro."

"Kaku. Wish circumstances were better." Kaku answered, managing a somewhat grim smile in response.

"Mm." Zoro agreed wordlessly.

Zoro would've used the opportunity to flirt more, but then the cook arrived with Chopper, and they were dragged off to go find Usopp.

\-----

They found Usopp bloodied and beaten in an alleyway.

A cold, murderous rage filled them all.

The Franky Family had hurt one of theirs.

Had left him bleeding and broken in a dirty alleyway.

_ How  _ **_DARE_ ** _ they. _

How  **_DARE_ ** they presume to harm one of  _ THEIRS _ and think they could get away with it?

Zoro would ensure they  _ suffered _ for this.

He wouldn't kill them, though, oh, no. That just wouldn't do at  _ all!  _ It would be over  _ far _ too quickly if he killed them.

No, he was just going to  _ break _ them. Piece. By piece. By piece.

"'The Son of Man will send out his angels, and they will weed out of his kingdom everything that causes sin and all who do evil. They will throw them into the blazing furnace, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.'" Zoro softly and solemnly intoned as he ran his fingers across Wado Ichimonji's hilt, a cold, cruel smile playing upon his lips.

The sword beneath his fingers seemed to vibrate within its sheath, and Sandai Kitetsu joined the chorus.

They moaned for blood, and Zoro intended to give it to them.

"Who the fuck are you guys?" One of the Franky Family members demanded.

"You wanted our attention," Zoro began in an icy voice, looking over them all with a cold, cruel expression on his face, "Congratulations, gentlemen: You have gained it."

With that, he and his nakama sprung into motion, going on the offensive.

It was a massacre.


	32. Duel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another ball drops.

They returned to the ship to treat Usopp...and to deliver the bad news.

Zoro noted that Robin wasn't present. He slotted a glance toward the cook, who caught the glance, and looked guilty.

_Fuck._

"But… What about the ship? What about the Merry?" Usopp asked, leaning forward. He must not have been on the ship when Kaku looked it over, "We can have her repaired with all the money we've got, right? We're lucky that we can have her repaired in such a first class shipyard. In order for her to travel in the seas ahead, I'd like her to be stronger."

Nami's fist clenched guiltily, Chopper miserably looked down, Sanji blanked his face while smoking, and Zoro's own expression went flat and _stayed_ flat, revealing nothing of his own thoughts or feelings.

"I want her to be repaired perfectly." Usopp finished, "And with all this money, they'll fix her, right, Luffy?" He was so desperately hopeful.

Luffy, proving to be either the smartest person in the room or the dumbest, chose to introduce the idea of changing ships in a casual way, with a smile.

Putting on a strong face for his nakama, Zoro could tell, given his captain wanted to cry and rage against leaving Merry behind even more than he had back at the shipyard.

"Eh… Well... " Luffy started, "Usopp, about the ship… I decided to get a new ship!" A poor choice of tone and wording, Zoro knew. He could already feel Usopp's desires twisting almost violently in response, his insecurities flaring up.

"What?" Usopp asked, disbelieving.

"I'm sorry that I made the decision without consulting you." Luffy continued, driving the knife in further and twisting it, knowing full well that what he was saying would hurt Usopp, but needing to say it, regardless, "But I've already made my decision. The Going Merry took good care of us, but our journey with her ends here."

It likely seemed cruel, how casually Luffy was treating this, but Zoro could _feel_ how much his captain didn't want to be doing this. Didn't want to be saying these things.

His captain wasn't one to dwell, however, and they all needed to keep moving forward.

Everyone looked hurt, and even _Zoro_ felt a faint ache at the idea of leaving Merry. It was the first "home" he could remember having. The Going Merry was special. It was _nakama._

But ships weren't like people.

Ships couldn't heal and grow stronger from the damage the way people did.

This was a necessary cruelty.

As Luffy flipped through the catalogue, Usopp held up his hands and requested that Luffy stop.

"Wait a sec. You're taking this joke too far. That's ridiculous. Right?" He asked, looking to the others for support.

But it wasn't a joke.

"See? Chopper took it seriously!" Usopp continued, trying to play things off and deny the reality of the situation, "Seriously, what'll we do with our captain? Say something to him, Nami." Usopp pleaded.

Looking back at the serious expression Luffy now wore, Usopp's face fell, finally realizing the situation.

"Do we somehow not have enough money?" He asked, worried, and Zoro heard the unspoken _"Is it because I wasn't able to protect Merry well enough??"_

Usopp continued panicking.

"No! That's not it!" Luffy interrupted, holding up his hands.

"Then why?! Spit it out! Are you trying to be considerate to me?!" Usopp demanded, gritting his teeth.

 _ **"I'M NOT!"**_ Luffy yelled back, "It has nothing to do with the money!"

"Then why are you saying stupid stuff like that we're gonna get a new ship?!"

"Hey! Stop it! Both of you!" Zoro broke in, knowing it wouldn't stop the tensions from continuing to rise, but wanting to try anyway, "What good will fighting do? Calm down and talk!"

"How can I calm down when he starts saying stupid stuff?!" Usopp demanded.

"Hey! This is an important matter. Don't get so worked up." Nami interrupted.

"She's right, Usopp! You're badly hurt! You need rest!" Chopper agreed, worried.

"Who cares about my body?! How can I be quiet when our captain casually says we'll get a new ship!?"

 **"IT'S NOT CASUAL!"** Luffy shouted, **"I MADE THE DECISION AFTER** **_AGONIZING_ ** **OVER IT!"**

 **"WHAT AND HOW DID YOU AGONIZE OVER TO MAKE THIS KIND OF DECISION?!"** Usopp screamed back, ripping the catalogue from Luffy's hand and flinging it to the ground, calling it an eyesore. "If it's not because of the money, then why?! **WHY DON'T YOU SAY IT?!** **_HUH?!_ ** **WHY ARE YOU KEEPING QUIET?! I WON'T ACCEPT IT UNLESS I HEAR A GOOD REASON!!"**

And Luffy told Usopp the reason.

"What...did you just say?" Usopp asked, suddenly quiet, his eyes wide in shock and horror.

 _"Don't make me repeat myself."_ Luffy said in a choked up voice, "The Merry can no longer be repaired. No matter what we do, she won't be fixed."

"No! There's no _way_ that what that stupid shipwright said is true!" Usopp denied vehemently, "Merry's strong! They're just trying to sell us a new ship instead of even trying to fix Merry!"

Usopp turned to Zoro, eyes desperately hopeful.

"Zoro, you've got magic, right?! Can you fix Merry? O-or do like you did with Nami, until we find someone who _will_ repair Merry??"

It hurt Zoro's cold, dead heart to have to shatter his hopes like this.

"Ships aren't people, Usopp." Zoro said as softly and gently as he could, trying to cushion the blow just a _little._

"What's that got to do with anything?!" Usopp protested, looking every bit his young age in that moment.

"A ship's soul is not the same as a person's soul." Zoro said slowly, still trying to figure out how to explain something so _innate_ to his senses. How could he explain the vast difference between the soul of a ship, the soul of an animal, and the soul of a person? What words could be used to explain something that, by nature, could not truly be defined in _words?_

Zoro scratched roughly at his scalp with one hand before grabbing a handful of hair and _yanking_ sharply in an attempt to force his brain to focus.

"It's like… Trying to compare a tree to a brick." He attempted, grimacing, because that was still an _appallingly_ poor fit, but it was as close as he could come up with, "Both exist, and both can be used to build, but they're not the _same._ In the same way, Merry's soul, while in existence, aware, and capable of desire… is not compatible with what I can do."

He could see that Usopp was beginning to grasp what Zoro was saying, but was still in denial about it.

"And… Even _if_ I could somehow bind Merry's soul in place…" Zoro continued, "How would I heal the damage that has been done? I'm no shipwright, and wood, metal, stone, and cloth cannot be mended the way flesh, blood, bone, and sinew can. So even _if_ I could affect Merry's soul…" He looked Usopp dead in the eyes, expression deadly serious, "Merry's keel would still crack, and we would all sink with it. Merry's soul would have been Damned to an eternity in Hell for **_nothing._ ** _"_

Silence reigned as the others digested Zoro's words.

"No. **_NO!_ ** You're just saying that because you're following Luffy like you **_ALWAYS_ ** do!!" Usopp denied, furious and heartbroken as he hurled accusations.

Usopp and Luffy ended up getting into a violent altercation, and Zoro stood by, arms crossed over his chest and face impassive, hiding the _hurt_ he felt at Usopp's accusation. Why the _hell_ would he do something like that? What reason would he have for lying about such a thing?

There was no terror or temptation to spread with such lies.

So why…

Why did Usopp think he was lying?

~~And why did it hurt so much?~~

Usopp yelled at Luffy for simply _moving on,_ accusing him of simply abandoning Merry without a single thought or concern, of abandoning Merry for being _weak,_ and Luffy nearly threw him off the crew, only to be stopped by the cook kicking him into the table and yelling at him for being careless.

Usopp still left the crew anyway, accusing Luffy of having wanted that result from the start.

~~He hadn't. Never. Not once. Of _course_ not. How could Usopp have ever believed such a thing about Luffy? Didn't he have any faith in their captain at all? Did he not _know_ what sort of man their captain was? ~~

"Go ahead and cut off useless nakama one after another and move on." Usopp said spitefully as he stood, "If you're going to abandon the Merry…" Usopp glared into Luffy's eyes, "...why don't you do that to me, too?!"

"Oi, Usopp. Don't say stupid stuff like that." The cook said, trying to intervene.

"No, I'm serious." Usopp said, "I've been thinking about this for a while. To be honest, I've been thinking that I can't keep up with your monstrous strength. Like today… I can't even watch over the ship."

Zoro closed his eyes, knowing this was the breaking point that had been coming for a while, now.

"I'll just keep causing you guys trouble." Usopp continued, "You don't need weak nakama, right? Luffy… You're the man who'll be King of the Pirates. But I don't have to go that high up. Thinking back, when I was about to sail out, you guys asked me to join you."

Yes, Zoro remembered telling Usopp to just get on the ship already. He remembered it distinctly, and he still meant what he'd said.

He'd never regretted having Usopp on the crew. It was a shame he was both too young and not interested in Zoro, but… That didn't mean Usopp wasn't still nakama.

~~It didn't mean that Zoro didn't care for and about him, as much as Zoro could care for anything, anymore.~~

"That's all that's tying us together." Usopp continued, scowling, and Zoro lifted his own head to blandly stare Usopp in the eye, desiring to at least give the man respect enough to meet his eyes while he left the crew, "We don't have to travel together when we have a difference of opinion!"

 _"Oi,_ where're you going, Usopp?!" The cook asked, alarmed.

"Where I'm going is my own business." Usopp stated, pausing in the doorway after having opened the door, "It has nothing to do with you guys anymore. I'm… leaving the crew." And with that he walked away.

Nami yelled at Luffy for doing nothing, then chased after Usopp, screaming for him to rethink his decision.

Instead of doing that, Usopp challenged Luffy to a duel for the Going Merry, and walked away.

Zoro simply watched him go, much like their captain, who stood there with his eyes shadowed by his hat ~~to hide the tears that wanted to fall~~.

Zoro's face might as well have been carved from ice, for all the expression and warmth that was on it.

 _Someone_ needed to remain in control, here.

 _Someone_ needed to be a pillar the others could rest upon.

 _Someone_ needed to be a stone foundation to keep them from crumbling like a house of cards.

That someone might as well be him.

He'd be anything his little captain needed him to be, after all.

\-----

Robin was missing.

Zoro wished he was surprised.

\-----

At moonrise, Usopp returned.

"I can't watch!" Chopper whimpered.

"If you can't stand to stay here and watch, then go inside the ship." Zoro told him, voice cold and firm, arms once more crossed over his chest and expression as rigidly impassive as stone.

He would allow no interference in this fight. Whoever won, won.

Who was "right" didn't matter.

This wasn't a game for little kids.

This was real life.

And Usopp was going to have to learn that, one way or the other.

And Zoro would be the one picking up the pieces left behind.

It was fine.

~~Zoro was used to picking up broken pieces after the young master broke them. He couldn't _count_ the number of times he'd needed to silence, smooth over, or cover up the things his lord had done... ~~

Everything was fine.

His heart wasn't breaking, because how could anything break what had already been destroyed years ago?

But still… It hurt.

But he'd never let any of them see that.

It was a hard fought battle, but in the end…

Luffy won.

Usopp laid defeated on the ground, unable to move.

"Game over." Zoro stated, watching impassively, arms at his sides.

Their captain crouched, picking up his hat, and put it upon his head, eyes shadowed beneath the brim as he stood with his back to the fallen sniper.

"Do what you want with the Merry." He stated, voice shaking just the slightest bit, "We'll get a new ship, and move on to the seas ahead!" He continued, voice louder and firmer.

He began to walk away.

"Well then, bye, Usopp… It's been fun." He bid his former friend farewell.

Chopper tore himself away from the sight, ran, grabbed his bag, and was about to leap over the railing to go treat Usopp, only for the cook to stop him.

"Oi, don't go, Chopper!" He called out, grabbing the little doctor.

"Why not?! He was already so badly wounded to start with, and now he got beat up worse!" The tiny reindeer demanded, tears in his eyes.

He tore himself out of Sanji's grip and turned to jump, but the cook grabbed him again, in a stronger grip, with both hands.

"This isn't a quarrel or a game!" The cook said, voice strained.

"So what?! I'm a doctor! Let me at least treat him!" Chopper shot back, furious and heartbroken, as he went heavy point and threw Sanji off, taking a swipe with the back of one arm.

The cook ducked under the swing, and then leapt up, grabbing hold of one shoulder and pressing his forearm against Chopper's neck, using his weight to force the doctor down against the railing.

"He lost the duel. On top of that, he gets pitied." The cook said softly and harshly, volume rising and tone getting angrier as he continued, "Imagine just how _miserable_ that must make him feel!"

Zoro continued to stare out at the battlefield, expression unreadable.

"Imagine how much suffering careless kindness can cause the loser!" The cook continued behind him, "He fought a duel knowing _full well_ this was how it might turn out!"

Luffy returned to the ship, and Zoro's eyes turned towards him, and Nami turned tearful eyes towards him, as well.

"It's heavy..." He choked out.

"That's what it means to be a captain, isn't it?" Zoro asked, voice calm and level as he stared off into the distance, _"Don't lose yourself._ If you waver, who can we trust?"

Chopper ran off to leave medical supplies by Usopp.

Zoro turned back.

"Let's vacate the ship." He said softly, as Chopper silently ran back to them, "We can't come back… to this ship, so…"

He pointedly ignored his captain's tears, and the tears of all the others.

His eyes remained dry, and his face and voice never wavered.

Merry wept.

\-----

They moved everything into a hotel.

The air was thick with regret and words unsaid. With worries and fears.

It was choking.

Zoro left for a walk, after making sure everyone was okay.

He needed to clear his head.

He could still hear Merry weeping, in time with the tune that echoed in his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally shorter. Then my brain went "How can I make this *sadder?* Oh I know! Take dialogue from the actual episode!" and then it got So Much Longer And Sadder!


	33. Late Night Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A surprise encounter leads to not quite as surprising results

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Explicit Sexual Content and Zoro being *particularly* lewd

Kaku was heading to the mission point when he came across Roronoa again. The man was as unfairly attractive in the moonlight as he was in the daylight, the shadows cast on him making him look _devastatingly_ dark and dangerous. Kaku had always had a thing for danger...

 _'_ **_No,_ ** _Kaku, focus on the mission! You don't have time to be ogling men, no matter_ **_how_ ** _beautiful and dangerous they are!!'_ He mentally scolded himself, shaking his head slightly to try and clear it of such distractions.

"Kaku." Roronoa said softly in that deep, rumbling voice that just _did things_ to Kaku's gut, making it wriggle pleasantly, "Surprised to see you out so late."

"I could say the same for you, Roronoa!" Kaku answered, putting a smile on his face that was more genuine than he'd like to admit.

"Please, call me Zoro." Roronoa purred, eyes half-lidded, but Kaku could see the sharpness hidden there; the _ferocity_ that had initially drawn Kaku to him. The _bloodlust_ and **_threat_ ** lurking beneath that sensual exterior, like sharpened steel beneath silk.

"Zoro-san, then." Kaku agreed with a nod, tone bright, "What has you out so late?" He asked, trying to figure out why the swordsman of the Strawhat Pirates would be wandering around so late at night, risking compromising their entire plan.

"S'a nice night; felt like taking a walk." The man answered with a shrug, before tilting his head to one side, smirk widening, "Now that I've come across you again, though… How about that date you said you'd take me on?"

Oh, shit.

Kaku _really_ wanted to take Roronoa to dinner, but.

The mission.

Lucci would be **_very unhappy_ **if Kaku missed the mission to take one of the enemy out on a date.

But. Kaku also had to maintain his cover, didn't he?

And…

Wouldn't it be better leverage over Nico Robin if they had one of her precious crewmates as a hostage, in a compromising position where it'd be _easy_ for Kaku to kill him if she didn't comply?

Yes. Yes it would.

"Ah, heh, it's a bit late, but. I know a place that's still open right now, if you're really interested?" He offered, smiling bashfully at Roronoa, only half acting.

The way Roronoa was looking at him, Kaku knew that, in all honesty, he could probably just take the man home with him and right into his bed. Kaku could tell that it would literally be that easy, but.

**_But._ **

Call him a romantic, but Kaku wanted to do this _right._ And "doing this right" meant taking Roronoa to dinner first, and being a good date.

So Kaku brought him to Blueno's bar, because it not only served fantastic drinks, but there was food available, too, even this late at night.

"A bar?" Roronoa asked, sounding amused as he shot Kaku a sideways look, smirking, "Intending to get me drunk to have your wicked way with me?"

Kaku laughed, honestly genuinely amused. It was rare for him to meet someone as forward and honest with their desires as Roronoa; it was honestly quite refreshing!

"Oh, no! Nothing like that!" He said with a grin, "It's just that Blueno has the best drinks, and the food is great, too!"

As Kaku ordered for them, he very subtly used some hand signs to signal to Blueno what was going on.

 _"Keeping Cover."_ He signed with a light tap of his fingers in a specific pattern, _"Hostage."_ He added with what looked like a random flick of his hand and fingers as he spoke to Roronoa, keeping his attention.

 _"Understood."_ Blueno signed back in an equally subtle gesture while cleaning a cup.

He bought Roronoa dinner, and a few drinks, honestly impressed with how the man could knock the drinks back without any effort.

"You really are beautiful, you know." Kaku said, watching warmly as Zoro laughed at something he'd said earlier.

The man paused, blinking at him, as though surprised, before smirking, confidence back in place.

"You tryin' to get into my pants, or something?" He asked, visibly amused.

Kaku couldn't help the laugh that bubbled out of him.

"Oh, no, nothing like that: I'm just being honest." He said in response, grinning.

Zoro observed him over the rim of his cup, eyes half-lidded and tongue flicking out to sensuously lick the beer foam off of his lips before sliding back into his mouth.

Kaku politely averted his gaze from the man's tongue, looking him in the eye instead of following that pink tongue's path.

"You really are, aren't you?" Zoro hummed, head tilting slightly to the right.

His smirk was smaller, and it seemed less hungry, somehow, too. Something was warmer about the look in his eyes. He looked a little bit less like he wanted to eat Kaku whole.

It kind of felt like he'd passed a test of some sort.

Kaku wondered what test, exactly, he'd passed.

Then Zoro slid closer in the booth they shared, smirk turning sultry.

"You're just being honest. Genuine." He murmured, voice throaty in a way that sent heat tingling through Kaku's limbs, "And that's _exactly_ why you're gonna get into my pants tonight."

_Oh._

Kaku's brain short circuited a little.

He couldn't help the slightly embarrassed laugh that escaped him as he looked down and rubbed the back of his neck. He could feel his cheeks burning, and knew his blush must be pretty spectacular.

He _really_ wasn't used to people being _that_ bold.

"I think I'm satisfied with this part of the date, if you are." Zoro rumbled, eyes regarding him with lazy but intense interest, "So why don't we head back to your place? Get a bit more… _acquainted_ with one another?" He asked, voice the sultriest purr Kaku had ever heard in his life as he flirtatiously stroked his fingers down Kaku's arm.

Then Zoro pulled back slightly, frowning faintly.

"...I s'pose I should tell you before we actually get to it that I don't have a dick. That gonna be an issue?" He asked.

Kaku blinked.

"You mean… You're trans?" He asked for clarification, receiving a nod in response. Kaku laughed softly, "Oh, no, that won't be an issue at all! Thank you for telling me, though." He said with a smile.

Zoro paused, and then let out a low rumble from deep within his chest, suddenly looking _ravenous._

"I cannot _wait_ to get you alone~." He purred, leaning right back into Kaku's space, _"I am going to throw you down and ride you 'til you can't remember anything but how much your mind's being blown."_

 _Well then._ How could Kaku possibly disagree? Especially when Blueno needed to close up shop to handle the mission, anyway.

\-----

They got back to Kaku's house, and the moment Kaku got them both in and had shut and locked the door behind him, Zoro had latched himself onto him, holding him close and kissing him hungrily. It was like he was trying to eat Kaku alive, or something, and Kaku couldn't deny that it was _really doing it for him._

He should really do something to work on not being so attracted to danger...but right then he just couldn't bring himself to give a single fuck about the warning bells Roronoa Zoro set off in his mind, beyond the fact that it made him _even hotter._

He pulled Zoro closer, kissing back just as hard and just as hungrily, nipping at lips and tossing his head back as the other man began kissing and nipping down his neck. _Damn_ but he was talented at this!

They made their way towards Kaku's bedroom, shedding clothes as they went, grinding and pressing against one another, desperate for friction and stimulation, hands and lips roaming freely.

Zoro paused, suddenly, head turning to look at something.

"Is something the matter?" Kaku asked, breathing a bit heavily, and certain he was more than a bit disheveled and flushed.

"That painting…" Zoro murmured, pulling back to go take a closer look.

Kaku blinked, and looked over.

Ah. Right.

He'd forgotten he was working on that.

How embarrassing.

Zoro stopped right in front of the easel, using one finger to very carefully trace the lines of the painting without actually touching the canvas or the paints atop it.

"Did you paint this?" He asked, sounding mildly _awed._

"I… Yes. I did." Kaku answered, honestly a bit embarrassed.

"This is _spectacular."_ The other man said, still absorbed in the work, "I can _feel_ the desire you've woven into it. The dream tied up within it… There's _soul,_ here."

He turned back towards Kaku with a heated gaze as he prowled over, moving like a hungry predator.

He pressed Kaku backwards onto the bed, crawling up his body to straddle his hips, forearms resting on Kaku's shoulders, his face right in front of Kaku's.

"That's your _dream,_ isn't it?" Zoro asked breathily, staring him right in the eye, the amber of his eyes almost overtaken by the black of his blown wide pupils.

Kaku blinked, and sucked in a breath.

How-

"How did you guess?" He asked, forcing a smile to try and keep things casual.

"I know a dream when I see one." Zoro answered, rolling his hips against Kaku's and getting a groan at the friction against Kaku's aching erection.

Kaku didn't really want to admit that he had any sort of dream outside of upholding the World Government's Justice, but.

Well.

What would it hurt, admitting it to this pirate? No one would believe him, even if he spread the information.

"Yeah. It's my dream." He confirmed softly, admitting out loud something he'd only ever held in the deepest depths of his heart, before, "I want to create a painting so famous everyone in the world knows of it, even years into the future."

It was… _Freeing_ to finally admit it, even if it was just to a pirate he'd probably never see again after this. He couldn't keep the grin off of his face at finally, _finally_ getting to speak the words out loud.

Zoro _purred,_ a rumble Kaku could feel resonate through his own body.

"You're skilled enough to do it, too, given even half a chance." He told Kaku, and the look on his face and in his eyes told Kaku that he wholeheartedly believed what he was saying, too, and suddenly, Kaku's vision was blurring a little, throat a little choked up.

How funny!

"Y'know…" Zoro continued, voice sly, "My captain _loves_ dreamers… And we _are_ looking for a shipwright to join our crew…"

Oh my.

"Is that a recruitment offer?" Kaku asked, both amused and honestly kind of flattered.

"Mmmm, if you want it to be." Zoro rumbled, smirking, "You're damn good at what you do, _and_ you have a big dream, on top of that. My captain _loves_ people like that… I do, too. We'd do everything in our power to help you achieve that dream of yours."

Kaku couldn't deny that he was tempted. He really, truly was.

This was the first time anyone had ever supported his dream, and he. Honestly really wanted to say yes, but.

He had a Duty.

The Mission came first.

To pretend otherwise was to invite death.

"Hehe, I'm flattered, Zoro." He said, "But I'm afraid I have things tying me here that I can't give up to go be a pirate."

The other man looked vaguely disappointed, but nodded in acceptance.

"Understandable," He said, softly, "S'not a one time offer, though."

He then rolled his shoulders, closing his eyes briefly before opening them and grinning wickedly.

"I'm not here to recruit you, though." He purred, eyes once more displaying a ravenous hunger as he smoothly rolled his hips down against Kaku's, drawing a groan out of him.

\----- (Beginning of the smut) -----

Back on track, then, Kaku supposed, grateful to be back on more familiar ground. He reached up, one hand resting on the back of the man's neck, pulling him down into a kiss. His other sliding down to cup his ass, squeezing the powerful muscles and getting a groan.

He rolled his hips up against Zoro's, getting an appreciative hum and more grinding in return.

He rolled them so that he was on top, and slid his hand down Zoro's pants, fingering the folds of his slit and thumbing at his dick. He felt oddly cool to the touch, too; poor circulation, perhaps?

"You're dry." He noted out loud as the other man shimmied out of his pants, glancing up to meet Zoro's hooded eyes as the other man carelessly tossed his pants aside, "'Cause of the hormones, right?"

Zoro simply nodded, and Kaku nodded back, understanding.

He reached over to his bedside table, opening the drawer and pulling out a tube of oil.

Zoro glanced over at it, arching an eyebrow.

"I don't need prep." He stated idly, looking vaguely amused, "I _like_ the pain."

Kaku glanced back at him, a bit more serious, but still smiling slightly.

"Well, it's still a good idea to have some, anyway." He said in return, "Helps prevent some pretty nasty potential accidents."

"Prolapse?" Zoro asked, eyebrow still arched, "Don't worry about that."

"It can be fun, though; lemme show you." Kaku offered, moving to kneel between Zoro's legs, spreading them wider.

Zoro looked interested, and Kaku lowered his face down to Zoro's slit, beginning to eat the man out. His tongue slipped between the folds, drawing an appreciative sound from the other man, who wantonly rolled his hips up into the sensation. Kaku swirled his tongue around Zoro's dick, getting a low, drawn out moan in response, and smirking as arousal shot through his own body like fire, pooling between his legs.

Not breaking eye contact with Zoro, Kaku opened the lube with one hand and put some on his fingers, then slid one into Zoro's opening, getting another _very_ appreciative sound. He was already fairly loose, and Kaku was rather gratified to know how much the other man _wanted_ this.

The look in his eyes was mildly confused, though, even if he was also very much enjoying it. Kaku wondered if anyone had ever done this for Zoro, before. 

Remembering that Zoro mentioned liking pain, Kaku very lightly bit down on his dick, getting a _VERY_ loud moan and a downright _aggressive_ buck of his hips, in response.

Alright, minor correction: Zoro _REALLY_ liked pain. Noted!

He added another finger while teasing Zoro with his tongue, enjoying the way the man _obviously_ enjoyed what he was doing. His fingers scissored and thrust into his opening all the while, and Zoro's hips rolled back against him, clearly wanting more. One calloused hand came down to curl in Kaku's hair, tugging _just_ hard enough on Kaku's hair to send thrills of pleasurable delight down his spine.

Zoro pulled him up and into a rough kiss, pulling back to pant out "I think that's enough'a you takin' care of me. Lemme make _you_ feel good." He rolled Kaku onto his back and slid down, dipping his tongue into Kaku's navel on the way down, and Kaku couldn't help the way his hips bucked in response.

 _God,_ this man! How did he just _know_ what Kaku liked and wanted??

"Oh _fuck…!"_ Kaku groaned as he watched Zoro undo the button of his pants _with his teeth_ before pulling the zipper down with his mouth.

 _FUCK_ that was hot!

He lifted his hips to help the other man strip off his pants and boxers, and then Zoro blew his mind _again_ by just deepthroating him without warning.

The sounds that escaped Kaku probably didn't even classify as _human_.

Zoro pulled back to tease the head, dipping his tongue into the slit before bobbing back down and letting his teeth scrape lightly along the shaft as he pulled back.

A litany of curses fell from Kaku's mouth, in response, and he could _feel_ Zoro's smirk around him as he bobbed his head up and down, lewd slurps and moans falling from that downright _sinful_ mouth.

He pulled off and shifted up and forward, one hand holding Kaku's shaft, lined up and…

"Oh, **_HELL!_ ** _"_ Kaku exclaimed, hands rising to grip _hard_ at Zoro's hips after the man drove down on him in a single thrust. He hadn't even gotten the chance to offer to wear a condom! And at this point, he didn't think he'd be able to, because his brain just flew out the window!

Zoro chuckled, looking down at him, eyes glimmering darkly with amusement.

"More than you know." He crooned with a truly _wicked_ grin.

He rode Kaku _hard,_ and it was all Kaku could do to roll his hips up to meet each downward motion. Zoro's hands pinned his shoulders down with incredible force, holding him in place. Kaku's fingers would _absolutely_ be leaving finger-shaped bruises on Zoro's thighs from how hard he was gripping them.

"Oh _fuck._ Oh _hell!"_ Kaku groaned, head falling back.

Zoro apparently took this as an invitation, as he leaned down and began biting and sucking bruises along Kaku's neck and shoulders.

 _ **"FUCK!"**_ Kaku howled at one particularly hard bite, back arching. His nails dug harder into Zoro's skin, getting a pleased growl from the man above him.

Kaku bared his teeth and returned the favor, attacking Zoro's neck and shoulder with his teeth.

"Ah, _shit~!"_ Zoro groaned, panting as he started moving even faster.

Kaku was close, too.

Wouldn't be gentlemanly to leave Zoro hanging though, so he unclenched once hand from Zoro's thigh to reach between them and begin stroking his dick. The action went over well, judging from the _snarl_ of pleasure followed by a litany of praises so _filthy_ Kaku would never after be able to think of them without going tongue-tied and red-faced.

Kaku's headboard was **_slamming_** against the wall, and had Kaku had the mental capacity for it, he might've felt sorry for his neighbors, because holy _HELL_ he and Zoro were _NOT_ quiet in the _slightest!_

Kaku didn't think he'd _ever_ moaned so loud in his life, and **_god,_ ** the _things_ Zoro said…! It was everything Kaku had _ever_ wanted from a sexual partner, but had never voiced, and somehow Zoro was uncovering and hitting every single one!

Stars burst behind his eyes as they rolled back, toes curling as his orgasm finally hit with the approximate force of Puffing Tom, steamrolling over him and leaving him breathless.

Distantly, he heard Zoro's choked gasp followed by a long, oozy moan as he clamped around Kaku, still rolling his hips through his orgasm. Good to know Kaku'd made him cum. He'd've hated to be a selfish lover, and he really just was not up to much of anything at that moment.

He was pretty sure his brain had dribbled out of his cock with his cum, and all he could do was lay there and gasp for breath.

\----- (End of the smut) -----

"Holy _shit."_ Kaku breathed as some level of sense finally returned to him.

Zoro chuckled softly next to his ear, chest resting atop Kaku's as he too, breathed hard from the exertion.

"You're not bad yourself, lover boy~." He hummed, idly running the fingers of one hand down Kaku's chest.

"...We should probably go get cleaned up before this all dries." Kaku murmured roughly a minute later, not really wanting to move, but knowing they ought to, or things would get uncomfortably sticky.

"Your shower big enough for two?" Zoro asked, lifting his head just enough to side eye Kaku.

"Eh, barely. It'd be a bit of a tight squeeze, but…"

"Sounds like a perfect excuse for round two." Zoro murmured, devilishly amused.

Kaku stared at him, honestly incredulous.

"What is even your sex drive?" He asked.

 _"Insatiable."_ Zoro purred back, pulling away and off of Kaku, sauntering off, hips swaying slightly, and Kaku almost regretted mentioning it, but.

"Ah, the bathroom is the other way."

Zoro recovered from the mistake with _aplomb,_ though. 

"Well then why don't you come with me and I'll take you once more to the further reaches of experience." Well damn! That was one of the smoothest lines Kaku had ever heard!

So he ended up railing Zoro in his tiny shower.

All good things come to an end, however, and Zoro left to return to his crew.

Kaku was kind of sad to see him go, but he understood: Duty _always_ comes before pleasure.

It was nice to be able to follow both, for once, though.

He didn't expect it would ever happen again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So who expected this, eh?


	34. Morning After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An explanation and a warning.

Zoro returned around dawn, climbing up the side of the building to the roof, rather than walk through it. Something about the way the people felt…

He was wary.

Something big was coming. The next wave of the storm.

His crew was… less than pleased with the evidence of last night's activities.

"Seriously?!" Nami hissed, glaring, hands on her hips. 

"All this happened, and you went out and got  _ laid?!" _ The cook added, nearly biting his cigarette in half as he glared at the marks Kaku had left along Zoro's neck.

Mmmmm~ He'd been  _ so _ talented with his mouth~...

Zoro's expression must have reflected a bit too much of his perversion, because the cook lashed out with a particularly  _ vicious _ kick, and Zoro barely had enough time to draw a sword to block it. It jolted his arm and wrist sharply.

_ Damn! _ The cook was  _ pissed! _

"Got a good idea of what happened to Robin while I was, though." Zoro said while blocking the cook's furious flurry of attacks.

The cook paused in surprise.

"What?" Zoro's nakama chorused, all moving closer.

"How do you know?" Was the general consensus.

"How'd you even figure that out?" The cook asked, suspicious.

Zoro sighed and rolled his eyes.

"After all this time, none of you ever thought to question how I  _ always _ know who to pursue for my…  _ proclivities?" _ He asked, honestly rather disappointed.

Judging from their blank looks, they never had. Zoro sighed.

"I. Feel.  _ Desire." _ He stated, "I  **_know_ ** what you want, even when you hide it from yourself. Every single desire, laid bare for my perusal, no matter how sordid, mundane, or momentary." He let his eyelids droop down as a small, wickedly devious smirk spread on his lips, "I'm just  _ polite _ and let you think I don't."

The dread that filled the faces of the witch and the cook was  _ delicious. _

"Yes. I even know about  _ those _ desires. Naughty, naughty~." He said, playfully chiding.

He was, of course, referring to Nami's desire to tear apart shoddy and misleading maps and the cook's  _ remarkably strong _ desire to murder whoever decided that vanilla should be so expensive. If they believed he was talking about  _ other _ desires… Then perhaps they should get their minds out of the gutter.

"What's that got to do with Robin?" Luffy asked, getting them back on track.

"I spent the night with Kaku." Zoro stated, expression losing all hints of playfulness and becoming serious, "His desires were quite…  _ illuminating." _

The cook and the witch pulled faces, obviously thinking only of the sordid desires.

"Namely," Zoro continued, plowing over whatever they wanted to say, "His desire to justify taking me on that date, when it would clash with the "Mission" he, Lucci, Kalifa, and the bartender Blueno are on. His desires eventually resolved with "keeping his cover" and using me as a hostage to  _ ensure Robin's compliance with their wishes." _

The air turned serious and grim.

"What do they want with her?" Chopper asked worriedly, and the desire to know the answer to that was shared amongst all of them.

"The World Government wants the ancient weapons, so they sent Kaku and the others to infiltrate Water 7. Judging from Kaku's more  _ hidden _ desires… There are blueprints for building Pluton, somehow connected to Iceberg." Zoro explained, arms crossed over his chest, "They want Robin because she can find and awaken the one that already exists."

He could practically  _ feel _ the shock and anxiety that filled them all with.

"Aren't those, like,  _ really _ dangerous?" Chopper asked in a tiny voice.

"Of course. Why else would the World Government want it?" Zoro asked rhetorically, tilting his head to one side.

"So you want us to believe that you went out and did what you did  _ just _ to find out what you did?" The cook asked skeptically, arching his very curly eyebrow.

Was that  _ jealousy _ Zoro detected? Surely not!

_ And yet. _

"Of course not, cook: If that was all, I'd've been done during the conversation where I convinced him to take me on that date." Zoro answered completely honestly,  _ relishing _ in how much it made the witch and the cook's desire to do violence against him rise. He smirked, and turned to Luffy, "He's got a dream, Captain, and the skills to reach it."

Luffy looked vaguely interested.

"But he's one of the bad guys who wants to hurt Robin." Zoro's captain said, pouting.

Zoro shrugged.

"Just sayin'. S'your choice who joins the crew, in the end." He said simply. He'd said all he intended to on that topic, anyway.

He paused as he started walking towards a wall, intending to nap.

"Oh yeah, and be careful when you go out today." He mentioned, "The feeling in the town was weird as I was headed back here. I think somethin' big happened. Dunno what, though." He turned around to give them all a very serious look, "This storm we're all caught up in ain't even  _ close _ to over, yet."

Their expressions went serious, and they nodded, taking the warning for what it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a cute li'l thing to tide you all over while I work on Enies Lobby.


	35. A Rather Frustrating Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angry mobs and assassins make for a rather frustrating day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Lewd Remarks and Violence

It was really annoying to have to dodge mobs of angry citizens for a crime he hadn't actually committed. Especially since he wasn't allowed to kill or even _hurt_ them, or his captain would be disappointed with him.

And all because the group the guy he'd fucked was a part of made Robin try to kill Iceberg, thus framing the Strawhats for the crime.

Annoying.

After evading capture for the day, Zoro, Chopper, Luffy, and Nami regrouped together outside Galley-La Headquarters, and began planning. They all wanted to know the truth. They all wanted to confront the turncoat shipwrights and stop whatever they were planning.

They wanted to save Robin.

Zoro did, too, in all honesty: She was a clever woman, and she'd admittedly rather grown on him.

They were spying on the building from a tree. Zoro was only paying half attention to his nakama, as they discussed the seeming strength of the shipwrights crowding the yard, choosing instead to pay attention to all the souls in and around the building. There were a lot… Including the dark and familiar souls of Kaku, Lucci, and Kalifa, all near where Iceberg's relatively dim soul was laying.

"I know where Iceberg is." Zoro stated out loud, keeping his voice down so only his nakama would hear him, drawing their attention, "Three of the four infiltrators are near him. So are the other Dockyard #1 shipwrights. Kalifa's in the room with Iceberg, and the shipwrights are sitting outside his door." He reported.

"Can you sense Robin?" Luffy asked seriously.

"Not yet." Zoro answered, shaking his head slightly, "But she'll be here; they wanna pin this all on us, after all."

He felt Kalifa leave the room, and Paulie enter...and then. Paulie left? He headed to another section of the building. He was too far away for Zoro to pinpoint his exact desires, but they felt conflicted. He wondered what had happened.

He felt Robin and Blueno nearby, and perked up.

"Captain." He stated, voice serious.

"Is it Robin?" Luffy asked, focus immediately sharpening.

"She's nearby." He confirmed, "Something's gonna happen, and soon."

An explosion hit the front of the building, and Zoro's eyes went wide. He had not expected something _that_ dramatic.

Luffy slipped off, and Zoro led the others into (more cautiously) following, wanting to get to the room where things were about to go down asap.

Zoro led them around the highest densities of shipwrights, assisting them in slipping into the building. He carried Chopper on his back; he and the witch were far better at sneaking around and blending with the shadows than the little doctor was.

For Zoro, moving through and with the shadows was as easy as performing the most basic sword katas, and the witch wasn't far behind him in skill.

A few subtle gestures of head or hands and they communicated intentions and directions just fine. Zoro was _excellent_ at navigating when it came to heading towards specific souls, or around others; things didn't move around the same way they did when he wasn't focusing on a specific target while traveling.

Zoro wanted to do violence and draw blood, but.

There were more important things at stake, here.

Personal desires had to take a backseat when it came to Duty.

 _'Such a pity, though…'_ He mused to himself as they slipped past another bunch of shipwrights, perched up in the rafters above their heads, _'I would have loved to play with them all.'_

He jerked his head slightly forward and to the left, nodding in the direction they needed to head to reach the location he felt Iceberg's soul in. The witch caught the motion and nodded in understanding, expression serious.

Such a shame that doing things stealthily like this meant having to take things far more slowly…

They arrived at the hallway outside of Iceberg's room, and found Lulu and Tilestone badly injured on the ground. Nami and Chopper both sucked in a sharp, frightened breath while Zoro simply assessed their condition and, deeming them almost certain to survive, moved on.

"Zoro, shouldn't we treat them?" Chopper hissed into his ear, frightened.

Zoro shook his head slightly.

"They'll be fine." He stated softly, eyes locked on where Robin and the government agents were, "What we need to focus on is that our enemies are all in that room with Robin and Iceberg." He set Chopper on the ground, and looked at them, "You two can stay here and wait if you want. I'm going ahead." And he did exactly that, walking right through the doors into Iceberg's room, drawing everyone's attention onto himself.

"Hello Kaku," He nodded to the figure in the skull mask, "Lucci," a nod to the figure in the bull mask, "Kalifa," a nod to the figure in the curly black wig and red gentleman outfit, "Blueno." he finished with a nod to the figure in the bear mask, "It's a fine night we're having, isn't it?" He asked rhetorically, grinning coldly, "Such a _shame_ you're all government dogs trying to take advantage of one of my nakama." His voice lilted softly, accent shifting to something more formal without his active awareness.

He stared them all down, spine straightening and chin lifting until he was staring imperiously down upon them, following some half-remembered instinct he didn't know the source of. His eyes were half-lidded, and a cruel, icy smile tilted his lips ever-so-slightly upwards at the corners.

He lightly stroked his fingers over Wado Ichimonji's hilt as one might caress a lover. He tilted his head slightly to the left, the icy expression on his face taking a faintly mocking tone.

"Oh, no need to be so surprised!" He crooned mockingly to Kaku, "I knew from the start that none of you were what you seemed."

Kaku moved, and his finger embedded itself in Zoro's chest, the tip stroking Zoro's heart.

Zoro didn't even flinch, just looking at Kaku with visible amusement, a small, patronizing smile on his face.

"Didn't get enough of penetrating me last night, _lover~?"_ He purred darkly in a low voice, "Now you're aiming for my heart?"

He could feel the warring desires to press the finger in further in an attempt to silence him and to pull back, both to uphold the deal made with Robin and out of respect for Zoro as a person. How _delicious~._

"The darkness you all contain couldn't have been more obvious." Zoro whispered into Kaku's ear, "You felt it in me, as well, didn't you?" It lilted up at the end as though it were a question, but both Zoro and Kaku knew it wasn't, "Like calls to Like."

With that parting remark, Zoro pulled back from Kaku's finger, grinning wildly, certain that there must be an absolutely _feral_ gleam in his eyes. He drew his swords, ignoring the wound in his chest and the dark red-black stain in his white shirt that sluggishly bloomed out from it.

He set Wado Ichimonji between his teeth, and raised Yubashiri and Sandai Kitetsu into a ready position.

"Shall we dance?" He asked, dipping his upper body forward slightly in a mocking parody of a bow.

\-----

Getting flung out of the building by a leopard man was very annoying, especially since Sandai Kitetsu was left behind.

Zoro _would_ get his revenge.

Eventually.

After he figured out where the fuck he was and how to get back to where he was meant to be.

He looked around at all the buildings.

None of them looked familiar.

Dammit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay between chapters! I was working on some other things while waiting for my inspiration to return for this fic! It's started coming back, so I'm posting up this chapter! Hope you all had/will have a wonderful holiday season!! =)


	36. Transitions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life is a series of changes and destinations.

_ "What's going to happen to you now that your father has died?" A voice asked, concerned. _

_ He turned to look at the speaker, somber and silent, dressed all in black, as befitted a time of mourning. He pursed his lips, as he looked into the bright blue eyes of his best friend. _

_ "I suppose I shall have to put my dream on pause and seek employment… I will likely have to sell most everything and move." He admitted, already resigned to the eventuality. That was how things were when one was of obviously mixed blood. _

_ His friend frowned. _

_ "You could come work for me." The boy said hurriedly, as though blurting it out. His pale skin pinked slightly, and he cleared his throat, "Ah, that is. My family is always in need of more workers, and it would be extremely helpful to have a serving man entirely my own… If you were so inclined. I'd ensure you had a room near to my own, and you would have your meals with the others who work for my family." _

_ "So I would be your servant?" He asked, seeking clarification. _

_ "Well, strictly speaking, yes, but-" His friend said, shifting slightly and looking sheepishly embarrassed. _

_ "-You would allow me to continue pursuing my dream, in the meantime?" He asked seriously, pinning his friend with a stare. _

_ "Of  _ **_course_ ** _ I would, _____! I know how important it is to you!" His friend exclaimed, eyes wide with outrage at the mere idea that he wouldn't let him pursue his dream. _

_ "And you will not ask me to do anything…  _ untoward?" _ He asked next, frowning slightly as he turned his face away to eye his friend from the corner of his eye. _

_ "Of  _ **_course_ ** _ not! I would  _ **_never!"_ ** _ His friend protested, looking offended. _

_ "Then… I accept. Thank you." He said with a weak smile. It would be a relief not to have to sell everything and struggle to find another place to live, or a reputable place which would hire someone like himself, and his friend's family took very good care of those who worked for them, so it was honestly the best he could've ever hoped for. _

~~**_'Better than you deserve.'_ ** _ A voice that sounded like every single person who'd ever discussed his mixed heritage in hushed tones within his earshot hissed in the back of his mind. _ ~~

_ His friend beamed at him, the expression only dimmed by the occasion. His smile was beautiful. _

_ "I swear you won't regret this decision." His friend swore, leaning forward to clasp one of his hands between his own, eyes sincere. _

\-----

Zoro woke up as his captain shook him, the dream already fading from his mind until it disappeared entirely.

They went and destroyed a giant wave with a combination attack, which was  _ fucking awesome. _

He couldn't shake the feeling of melancholic longing which lingered in the back of his head, however, echoed softly by the tune.

\-----

The cook called Nami on the tiny transponder snail he'd left for her. 

(Zoro  _ still _ found the fact that people used  _ snails _ to call one another  _ absolutely fascinating. _ How did it work? How did all of the snails share thoughts the way they did? And then not just  _ share _ them but  _ speak them aloud, _ in the voices and with the expressions of those speaking through them? He could tell it wasn't dark magic; he would've felt it, if it were. Perhaps some form of nature magic? Or something simply innate to the species? What a spectacular mystery!

Also their little hats were  _ fantastic.) _

"Just sit there, cook; the enemies are too strong for you to face alone. We're on our way." Zoro said, frowning.

"Aww, are you worried about me, marimo? You gonna ask if you can have my soul?" The cook asked tauntingly, causing Zoro to narrow his eyes.

Something  _ wrenched _ inside of Zoro at the question.

~~**_HowdarehehowdarehehowDAREhe?!?!?!_ ** ~~

"I do not desire  _ your  _ soul." He hissed, tone suddenly icy.

The others shot him odd looks, and Zoro could see Sanji's surprised blink across the snail.

"...Alright,  _ good. _ 'Cause I wouldn't've given it to you, bastard. And I  _ am _ gonna get Robin-chan back. Just you watch." The cook said, a bit awkwardly, before hanging up the snail.

Zoro glared at the tiny snail held in Nami's hand for a couple seconds longer before scoffing and turning away, pointedly closing his eyes and leaning back against the wall, arms crossed over his chest.

~~ Beneath his rage, a cold panic lurked, clawing at his lungs and heart, and clogging up his throat. ~~

He couldn't wait to reach Enies Lobby.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A couple more pieces of the puzzle!


	37. A Wild Battle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A devil and an assassin meet in a room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Violence and Zoro's "flirting"

Numbered keys, each held by a different member of CP9. Only _one_ of which would unlock the seastone cuffs on Robin.

A blatant time wasting tactic, if ever he'd heard one.

Still, if they wanted to rescue Robin, they'd have to play ball… for now. 

His allies all split up in different directions, and that suited Zoro just fine. 

He had a very specific target he was after, and he could _feel_ where he was.

He began heading up. It would be rude to leave his target waiting, after all. 

\-----

Sandai Kitetsu gleamed hungrily in the light as Zoro stepped into the room where Kaku was waiting for him. The cursed blade seemed to shiver in anticipation, whispering eagerly for the blood about to be spilled and humming along to the tune in Zoro's head.

"You've already drawn your swords?" Kaku noted, eyes turned towards Zoro.

Zoro tilted his head to the right, a ravenous grin spreading across his face.

"They're moaning for your blood." He said, deep and throaty. He could feel the shiver of Want thread through his victim like a drug through veins. 

"Are you flirting with me, Roronoa?" Kaku asked, looking over to him and smirking.

"I know that's what you Want." Zoro teased darkly, "And I'd be _delighted_ to show you further pleasures, but first, a matter of business: You have the key to Robin's cuffs, don't you? Want to give it to me, or do I have to play _rough?"_ Zoro asked, staring him down, still smirking.

Kaku's eyes shifted over to Zoro, though he hadn't turned his head yet. 

"That's a foolish question." He said simply, "I was disappointed that I didn't get to see your real ability at the Galley-La mansion. I never thought that pirates would come this far, either, so…"

"You flirted so sweetly, I had to hunt you down to repay the favor. This time, I won't stop until I've taken your heart." Zoro purred, eyes half-lidded.

"Is that so? Well, with energy like that, I'd almost believe it." Kaku said, grinning with anticipation as he turned to look at Zoro, "Energy like that of a beast. What a fearsome man you are." He uncrossed his legs and stood, grasping his swords, "But, my swordsmanship is the best in CP9." He fell into a fighting stance, "Don't underestimate me."

Zoro chuckled darkly, eying the two completely plain and unadorned swords with interest. They had no defining features whatsoever. Completely plain and unremarkable. The only thing even marginally of note about them, physically, was the complete lack of guard for the hands, which made the blades rather treacherous to use. Fitting swords, for a government assassin.

And yet, even though they were plain and unremarkable… Zoro could feel the beginnings of an awareness within them, not unlike that of the named swords Zoro himself wielded, which carried with them their history alongside the dreams and madness of their past wielders.

Kaku had obviously wielded these particular swords very often, perhaps even since the moment they were first forged. They felt very strongly of the man's will and desires, and they _hungered_ for blood and for battle.

"Two sword style?" Zoro asked thoughtfully, only to have to rapidly bat aside two flying slashes Kaku'd launched with his legs after twirling his swords rapidly before slamming them into the ground to use as leverage for the kicks. All without even unsheathing them.

"Tempest Kick." Kaku intoned after the fact, standing back up straight and smiling politely.

"So, no… Sorry, but I use four swords." He explained politely.

Zoro took the opportunity to set Wado Ichimonji between his teeth, already feeling his body _thrumming_ with the onset of battle. Given the shiver of Desire he felt from Kaku, he was certain the other man could feel the bloodlust radiating off of him.

"No problem." He purred, eager to spill blood and draw screams from this man before him, "Your whole _body's_ a weapon, isn't it? How _delightful~."_ His grin widened around Wado Ichimonji's hilt, "I wonder how the blood of a living weapon tastes?"

He charged, and Kaku blurred out of view, the sheathes to his swords left hanging in the air.

A beat.

The sheathes hit the floor.

Steel clashed.

The sheathes bounced back up.

Clash!

Their swords met again.

A strike aimed for Zoro's head blocked by a tilt of the head that brought Wado Ichimonji up.

Kaku lept back, and immediately had to block a strike from Zoro.

The sheathes finally came to rest on the ground as they paused to reassess one another.

Their eyes met, both reflecting their desire to draw blood and do violence upon the other. Utterly serious as bloodlust crackled in the air.

"Hm." Kaku snorted, just before Zoro went on the offensive, forcing him to back up while blocking the volley of strikes.

Kaku blurred out of view and kicked up into the air, reappearing above Zoro to launch a Tempest Kick right as Zoro sent a flying slash back at him.

The attacks canceled out, sending dust flying.

Kaku blurred down to land behind Zoro as Zoro squinted against the dust.

Zoro sank Sandai Kitetsu down into the floor just in time to block two strikes aimed for his legs. He used the leverage to send Kaku spinning back several feet.

Kaku had to rapidly duck back to become parallel to the floor to dodge the charging swing Zoro had aimed at his neck, flipping back onto his feet at the end of it.

Black fabric flew up into the air; first actual contact went to Zoro, even if it was only Kaku's clothing.

They paused for a moment, Zoro standing with his back to Kaku, and Kaku crouched on the floor after the hasty backflip he'd done.

Kaku began to laugh.

"This is fun!" He exclaimed, and Zoro could _hear_ the bloodthirsty grin on the other man's face. He couldn't keep the eager grin off his own face, in response.

Finally, an opponent who matched his endless lust for battle and bloodshed!

Zoro turned, eyes gleaming predatorily.

"So nice to finally meet someone who's so eager and willing to play~." He said around the sword in his mouth, "Pity I don't have the time."

"Then you just have to take me down." Kaku shot back with a malicious smirk as he blurred out of existence.

He reappeared on the ceiling, swords dug in to keep him in place.

"Tempest Kick...Slaughter!" He announced, before beginning to rain down flying slashes upon Zoro.

All three of Zoro's swords blurred as they deflected the deluge of slashes aside, the room falling to pieces around them in response.

Zoro _purred_ internally at the violence and lethality. Kaku was genuinely trying to kill him! How delightful! He hadn't had this much fun since dear old Daz, all the way back in Alabasta!

"Are you teasing me?" Zoro asked with a smirk, head tilted slightly in question as he stood cool as can be after the onslaught ended.

"Whoa… I'd expect no less from you." Kaku said, sounding mildly impressed, "If you're in that much of a hurry, I'll show you…" He let his swords fall to the ground, "...my new powers."

"Oh~?" Zoro asked, perking up slightly with interest as Kaku's form began to waver before his eyes.

His form grew taller and taller, sprouting fur.

A devil fruit? One like Chopper's, or that man from Drum, what was his name? Ah, yes: Dalton.

Zoan type, if Zoro recalled the terminology Chopper had shared with them.

Kaku sprouted a tail. Would he scream like a cat if Zoro yanked on it? Zoro _very much_ wanted to find out.

Horns ripped through the top of Kaku's black cap.

He had become… a giraffe?

How _fascinating!_

The floor collapsed under their feet, dropping them into the midst of a confrontation between Usopp - ah, pardon him, _Sogeking_ \- and a wolf man.

"Oh shoot!" Kaku shouted as he fell, in full giraffe form, "I was gonna stop the transformation when I became my human-beast form, but I became a giraffe!"

"A TALKING GIRAFFE IS FALLING TOWARDS US!!" Uso- _Sogeking_ \- screeched, gaping upward.

The wolf man was laughing so hard he was crying.

"Kaku! That power of yours is too cool!" He howled.

"An interruption? How annoying." Zoro murmured, eyes narrowing in distaste as he assessed the wolf man.

Kaku yelped as he stood upright on his hooves, eyes wide in shock.

"The Ox-Ox Fruit: Model Giraffe!" The wolf man - Jabra - cackled, "You poor guy! To think that you'll be a giraffe-man for the rest of your life!"

"What's wrong with giraffes?!" Kaku demanded, glaring at Jabra, "I said I like it!"

""I said I like it"?!" Jabra mocked, smirking at Kaku, bursting into tears of laughter once more, "I'm sure you do! Giraffes are cool, aren't they?!"

"Wh-what're you talking that way for?!" Kaku demanded, stuttering slightly as he lost his cool, bending his long neck down to glare Jabra in the face.

"Sogeking. Don't you dare." Zoro stated coldly in a low voice, pitching it so only the sniper would hear him. He shot a vicious look back at him from the corner of his eye, "If you interrupt my duel, I'll be forced to express my… _displeasure."_

The sniper squeaked, but hastily abandoned his idea.

"Take the cuffs, just don't use 'em here; the giraffe is _mine,_ and I _will_ have him." Zoro added, shifting his hungry gaze back upon the two Zoans in front of him.

"I said don't laugh!" Kaku screeched at Jabra, thoroughly distracted and flustered.

Zoro shifted his gaze onto the wolf, glaring.

"I'm not terribly fond of interruptions." He stated, raising his voice and drawing the attention of the squabbling duo, "We never negotiated for a threesome, so I don't know why the dog thinks he can simply include himself."

"EH?!" Jabra demanded, glaring back at Zoro, "Who said I wanted anything like that with you or _HIM?!"_

"Good~." Zoro purred, eyes glinting with dark intent, "Then **get out of the way."** He ordered, voice reverberating slightly as he sent a flying slash at the wolf, who tanked it.

Zoro tilted his head to one side, pondering.

"My captain would look good with a wolf skin cloak. How about I skin you first, puppy?" He asked.

 **_"PUPPY?!"_ ** Jabra raged as Kaku began cackling.

Zoro charged, and, as he'd expected, Jabra took the hit full on, confident in his Iron Skin technique. Zoro's smirk widened.

He used the leverage and his own monstrous strength to **_fling_ ** the wolf off of the battlefield, crashing through several walls and, from the sound of it, off of the stairs.

Zoro returned his gaze to Kaku.

"Now that the unwanted extra has been removed… Shall we play?" He asked, tilting his head and smiling around the hilt in his mouth.

Kaku's eyes narrowed at him, calculating. Zoro knew he'd surprised the man with the display of pure, raw strength.

"How foolish… Don't underestimate a giraffe's limitless destructive potential." Kaku warned, transforming into his hybrid form, which was, somehow, _even taller_ than his full giraffe form.

Zoro tilted his head to one side again as a thought occurred to him.

"...Is your dick bigger like that?" He asked.

Kaku stopped, brain visibly screeching to a halt.

"...I'm sorry, what?" He asked, genuinely baffled.

"Your dick." Zoro repeated, motioning one hand towards Kaku's groin, "Is it bigger like that?"

Kaku just stared at him, blankly uncomprehending.

"We're in the middle of a fight, and you're asking about my dick?" He asked, a bit weakly.

"Not much difference between fighting and fucking." Zoro stated with a shrug.

"...You're a very odd man, Roronoa." Kaku said, just staring.

"I told you..." Zoro said, launching an attack that was immediately parried, kicking off a clash that lasted several seconds.

As they paused to reassess, he finished his statement: "To call me Zoro."

He turned back to grin wickedly at the giraffe-man.

"If you're gonna be screaming my name, I'd rather it be the one I chose." He said cockily before launching himself at Kaku, "You'd better hope that long neck of yours doesn't become your weak point."

"There's no need to worry about that." Kaku announced as he bent his neck out of the way of the strike, "The muscles I've gained are strong enough that I can even freely control my neck."

Zoro's eyes narrowed.

"And bullets, too! Nose Pistol!" The giraffe-man's head launched forward, forcing Zoro to block the strike with all three swords.

A shockwave blasted through the area from the force of the collision.

The two collided again and again with swords, kicks, and snout strikes.

Zoro absently noted that the wolf had returned, but couldn't spare any attention to that.

Usopp could deal with that, surely.

Well, turns out that was false, but it's fine, because the cook showed up to launch the wolf away with a devastating kick, allowing Zoro to once more fully refocus on fighting Kaku.

Excellent; he hated having his playtime interrupted.

Kaku ended up landing a solid strike with his snout in a clash, sending Zoro skidding back, using his swords to slow his uncontrolled momentum. He was pretty sure he'd felt a rib or two crack!

_Exquisite._

He flicked his tongue over his lips, tasting salty sweat and the copper tang of blood, and he grinned at Kaku.

"Picking me as your opponent was your downfall, huh?" Kaku asked as he landed, swords at the ready, "If you were fighting Jabra, you might've had a slight chance of winning."

"No, I'm glad it's you." Zoro denied, looking up and right into Kaku's eyes, knowing from the way the man drew back slightly that his eyes must be like twin voids.

The man recovered admirably quickly, however, and scoffed.

"Hmph. Enough with your bluffing."

Zoro drew himself back up, swinging one sword to test the mobility of his shoulders and ribs.

Acceptable.

\-----

Their next clash caused the tower to shift even further, a previous attack from Kaku having cleaved through the entire building.

"I'm saying if I had to choose, I like meat better!" Kaku exclaimed, continuing a thread of conversation begun during the conflict.

"And I'm saying it doesn't matter, herbivore!" Zoro shot back, pulling his bandana off of his arm to tie it around his hair.

"Hm?" Kaku grunted, leaning his neck back slightly as he watched Zoro with mild confusion.

"In any case," Zoro said, more softly, "I'm afraid I'll have to cut our foreplay short and take your key." He finished tying his bandana, "If I can't make it in time, it'll be the same as defeat." He rolled Yubashiri into a reverse grip in one smooth motion, taking up a stance with two of his swords, "And that's unacceptable. Two-Sword Style: Nigiri."

"You get stronger when you wear a towel on your head?" Kaku asked, smirking in amusement.

"Fuck around and find out." Zoro shot back with a smirk of his own.

He launched himself forward, the force used leaving craters in the ground as he blurred into the air right before Kaku, who drew back in slight surprise at his speed.

"Tower Climb!" Zoro snarled, swinging his swords up the length of Kaku's neck with flying slashes that the man only _barely_ dodge out of the way of.

The move shifted immediately into "Tower Climb Return!" and he swung his swords back down, once again only _barely_ dodged by the assassin.

"Flash!" This one was blocked by Kaku's snout, but the flare of light from the attack dazed the assassin, "Ripple!" Another attack just barely dodged.

"If you jump, you'll have blind spots." Kaku pointed out, swinging his neck towards Zoro, "Giraffe Scythe!" Zoro was sent flying, but shook off the damage easily.

"Iron Body. No blind spots." Kaku said smugly, smirking, before turning into a cube, "I've become a square with no blind spots."

"I think you _are_ teasing me." Zoro said as he rose, flicking his tongue across his lower lip.

"You're so naive…" Kaku said, "Have you not noticed...? Giraffes have four legs. Tempest Kick!" He began flailing all four limbs, directing thousands of tiny slashes up into the air, only for them to bounce off the ceiling and begin to descend upon Zoro.

Zoro deflected a fair chunk of them, but the rest rained down upon him like thousands of sizable papercuts. Delightful!

Kaku used his Iron Body to avoid taking damage from his own attack.

Zoro was drenched with his own dark blood by the end of the assault, and panting with mixed pain and pleasure. He groaned in bliss as he stood, his numerous cuts pulling open further.

His swords rose to block a strike from Kaku's snout, but he was still sent backwards.

He rose again.

"You…" He began, "Are _such_ a tease." He looked up, eyes dark and hungry, "Do you really desire to play with me so badly?" He asked, voice throaty, "Because I think you do."

"What a tough guy you are." Kaku remarked, amused, "I'm flabbergasted."

Zoro spat out some blood. It sizzled on the grass.

"You speak such _sweet_ nothings." He crooned, sheathing all of his swords and drawing Wado Ichimonji.

"If you're mocking me, you'll pay for it." Kaku stated seriously.

"Likewise." Zoro stated seriously, holding the sheathe in one hand and the hilt in the other, "It's Time To Play."

A bell tolled deeply in his mind, voicing its resounding agreement.

Zoro drew on the power he'd discovered while fighting Daz.

"First, I'm gonna break through that Iron Body of yours."

"You are going to break through Iron Body?" Kaku asked, amused, "You think you can do it?"

"Yeah, of course." Zoro answered calmly, "Want me to try?"

He shifted Wado Ichimonji into position for a quick draw strike.

"One-Sword Style...Lion Strike." He intoned, moving forward in one rapid strike that ended so fast it took until Zoro sheathed Wado Ichimonji again for Kaku to notice he'd been cut...or would have, had Kaku not deflected the attack with a flying slash.

"Tempest Kick...Dragon Cut!" The two attacks clashed, and Zoro's momentum ended as Kaku landed back on the ground.

"Would you have been able to cut if it was iron?!" Kaku asked, looking over his shoulder at Zoro, "It's my call as to whether or not I use Iron Body to block your attack."

The bell tolled once more, demanding tribute.

They met once more in a clash of strength, which Zoro won, sending the giraffe-man flying back.

Kaku pulled out a new technique, but Zoro blocked it...and Kaku fouled up while trying to use it again, his legs growing longer in response to having pulled his neck in so far.

The bell tolled more insistently, and something began _itching_ at the back of Zoro's mind, clawing to get free.

Wado Ichimonji and Sandai Kitetsu howled along with the tune in Zoro's head, baying for blood.

The bell tolled again.

Zoro deflected an assault from Kaku using a spinning blade tornado.

Kaku lept up to the second floor to grab his swords before coming back down with a downward swing.

There was banter, but Zoro ignored it, barely able to hear past the bell tolling and the chorus of the song.

"The giraffe's power is very strong..." Zoro said, "You can store your obstructive neck away... You use the Four-Sword Style… Hmph!" He stopped the assault of Kaku's blades.

"None of those things... can b **e a basis for my defeat."** He spun his blades, twisting forward, dodged momentarily by Kaku's use of Paper Arts...but a sudden strike drew blood from Kaku, and knocked him to the ground.

Kaku stared at him in shock.

"Why so surprised, _lover?"_ Zoro crooned mockingly, as he turned back around to face Kaku, cruelty etched into every line of his expression, "Don't tell me you've never been cut before."

"Hmph! I see... So it wasn't just an empty boast." He said with a fierce grin, delighted to finally be faced with an actual _challenge,_ "I underestimated you a bit. But no longer. I've mastered the Six Powers. On top of that, I now have the wild powers of a giraffe. Technique, power, speed… There's no way you can beat me in any of them!" He raised one sword to point at Zoro, "I won't give you any more openings to attack!"

Zoro wondered why he was still teasing and not playing.

He deflected the flying kicks sent his way, but got hit in the gut by a shot to the gut by Kaku's snout.

"The four sword attacks will not stop." Kaku declared, glaring, "Just give it up!"

Zoro got back onto his feet just in time to block another attack.

"Here I come…" Kaku said, grinning maliciously before launching a furious and unrelenting stream of sword strikes from all four limbs, giving Zoro no recourse but to keep blocking and backing away.

"Well, well! What's the matter?! All you can do now is block!" Kaku taunted, "You can't defeat me!" Two of his strikes broke through Zoro's guard to draw further blood, and a groan of mixed pain and pleasure from Zoro.

"You guys are mere pirates." Kaku continued, voice cold, "It was a mistake to go up against the World Government in the first place!" A cut to Zoro's gut, mostly absorbed by the haramaki.

"Now that it's come to this, in the name of justice, you'll have to die…" The strikes wouldn't let up, "...just like that woman!"

Something broke loose in Zoro's mind, and it felt like everything…

 **_Slowed_ ** _._

It all made sense.

The world rendered in cold, icy clarity.

He knew _exactly_ what Kaku was about to do, and he interrupted the assault with almost laughable ease.

It was so simple.

How hadn't he figured it out before?

The bell tolled, louder now, the tune filled in with notes he hadn't remembered were missing.

A melody of total despair and anguish.

A dark, terrible chuckle escaped him, slow and deep.

 **"Tell me, darling dear... "** He asked, voice echoing unnaturally, **"Are you finally ready to stop teasing and start playing?"**

"Hm?" Kaku asked, leaning back in surprise at the shift.

 **"It's time to stop teasing, lover."** Zoro said, stepping forward with slow, calm certainty of purpose, **_"It's Time To Play."_ **

He blurred out of view, swords only failing to split the giraffe's belly open due to a hasty, instinctive use of Iron Body from Kaku.

Zoro tilted his head to one side with false innocence.

 **"Do you want to play?"** He asked almost childishly, with sheer _malevolence_ rolling off of him in waves so thick and dark they almost seemed to seep into the visible spectrum.

 **_"I_ ** **want to play."** Zoro continued idly as he stepped closer, effortlessly sidestepping Kaku's attacks, and then Kaku was suddenly pinned to the ground, with Zoro hovering over him, looking him dead in the eye with eyes as empty and dark as a beetle's, **_"With you."_ ** Zoro finished, almost _breathing_ the words as one of his cold, icy hands came up to almost lovingly stroke Kaku's furry face.

"What are you?" Kaku asked, eyes wide, voice shaking ever-so-slightly.

Zoro smiled. It should have been a warm, friendly expression, with how soft it was, but instead, it was cold and cruel, like the serrated edge of a tool intended for torture.

 **"An explorer of the furthest reaches of experience. Demon to some,** **_angel_ ** **to others."** Zoro answered simply, the words coming to him easily, like he'd heard and spoken them a million times. The back of his hand brushed across Kaku's cheek once more.

Kaku swallowed thickly.

"You're not human." He stated with complete certainty, causing Zoro to chuckle softly.

The smile on Zoro's face was vaguely condescending, like the type one would give a child who'd _just_ figured out something very simple.

 **"Whatever gave you that impression, my darling?"** He asked, darkly amused as his nails seemed to be pushed out to be replaced with jagged shards of metal, like the hooked tips of particularly cruel knives. He leaned forward and exhaled in Kaku's face, the breath coming out in a cloud of frost, bitingly cold, even through Kaku's fur. His skin had an unnaturally pale and ashen look to it, and dark shadows encircled the malevolent abysses that had replaced his eyes.

 **"Time to play."** Zoro crooned, digging his blade-like nails into Kaku's flesh and dragging them downward, cutting through Kaku's Iron Body as easily as wet tissue paper.

Kaku threw him off, launching attack after attack, but Zoro was right back on the offensive, shrugging off injuries like he didn't notice them and launching inhumanly powerful ones of his own, limbs moving so fast it was like he had more than just two arms. Each wound Zoro inflicted upon Kaku was calculated to be as messy and painful as possible.

And Zoro was very, _VERY_ good at inflicting pain, and he _relished_ in every grunt and pained cry he pried out of his victim.

\-----

In the end, Kaku collapsed to the ground, reverting to human form, utterly defeated.

Zoro sheathed his swords, leaving his back to Kaku.

Kaku stared up at the sky.

The tune quieted in Zoro's head, and he reached up and took off his bandana, the clarity he'd achieved during that battle already slipping through his fingers like sand.

"I've got… a message for you from the junior boss of Galley-La." He said softly, voice no longer resonating oddly, "He said you guys're fired." He finished, glancing back over one shoulder, head turned _just_ enough to see Kaku's still form out of the corner of his eyes.

Kaku continued staring up at the sky, gasping for breath, the injuries he'd received sluggishly bleeding and _unbelievably_ painful.

"Paulie, huh?" He asked, frowning as he remembered his time in Water 7. He closed his eyes, "I see… I'm in trouble. Assassination skills aren't very helpful in other lines of work." He already knew his failure here would result in his termination by the World Government, and then, he remembered something, and turned towards Zoro.

"Hey… That offer you made, that night… Is it still open, by any chance…?" He asked, not quite daring to hope.

"I think my captain's found the shipwright he wants." Zoro said in response, causing Kaku to sigh again, eyes closing once more, defeated.

"But." Zoro continued, causing Kaku's eyes to open, surprised.

The swordsman turned towards Kaku, now standing sideways from him, there was a faint smirk on his face.

"We don't have an artist, yet." He offered.

Kaku couldn't help the surprised laugh that escaped him.

"An artist?" He asked, chuckling, even as hope rose unbidden within his chest, "What use do pirates have for one of those?"

"What use do pirates have for archaeologists?" He returned with a smirk, "My captain doesn't care for practicality."

"Hahaha…!" Kaku laughed, even though it hurt, "You're sure it'll be fine?" He asked.

"You're a giraffe-man that can turn into a cube." Zoro returned with a smirk, "My captain's gonna _love_ you."

Kaku laughed a bit more, then fell silent, still smiling.

"Alright, guess I'll leave things in your hands, then, Zoro." He agreed, "But first… You'll need this." And he held up the key he was holding, intending to hold it out to Zoro...but his strength gave out and he passed out, dropping it to the ground.

Zoro collected it up anyway, and Usopp shot it over to Franky and Robin after a small pep talk from the cook (and Zoro's heart _clenched_ at the kindness the cook held within him, but he shoved aside the ache to focus on the present).

Zoro picked up Kaku's swords and sheathed them, threading them through his haramaki near his own swords, running his hands along the hilts of his swords to reassure them that these two newcomers were only _temporary_ additions. He then collected Kaku up, holding him piggyback style.

"Wait. Why are you taking him with us?" The cook asked, frowning.

"'Cause I want to." Zoro stated simply, hiking Kaku further up on his shoulders, not giving the cook a second glance, "We don't have time to waste arguing about it. Let's go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there ya have it: Zoro's done a preliminary recruitment of Kaku! Now we just need to wait on Luffy's decision, because the captain has the final say!!
> 
> As a note: I *hate* writing fight scenes, and I ripped most of this one from the episodes the battle was in. There *may* be other fight scenes in the future... but probably none this long. This chapter really ran away from me, but... I like it. =)
> 
> Hope y'all appreciate the extra long chapter, after the last couple really short ones! Haha


	38. Pulled Along

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enies Lobby draws to a close, and the Strawhat Pirates gain a new addition.

Granny Kokoro was a mermaid. Go figure. Zoro wasn't sure why everyone else passed out at the sight of her; he thought she looked just fine. A bit underwhelming, compared to the ideals of mermaids, sure, but hardly worth going  _ insensate _ over! Rather insulting of them, honestly. Especially the cook.

Wasn't he always claiming that he loved and appreciated  _ all _ women? And claiming that  _ Zoro _ was rude for not falling all over himself to please them?

Hypocrite.

\-----

Kaku woke up by the time they were on the Bridge of Hesitation, in front of the Gates of Justice. He was badly wounded, but conscious. Zoro, having brought Kaku's swords along in his haramaki, held them out to the man.

"You ready to fight your government?" He asked, voice serious.

Kaku seemed to understand the question behind the one Zoro had asked, and gazed seriously back.

"Not really," He admitted, "But I've already committed myself to this course, and to hesitate now would bring even more shame onto myself, so..." He grasped the swords firmly, "I'll do it anyway."

Zoro's face split into a truly wicked grin as he released the two swords to their master.

"Good answer." He affirmed.

The fight was long, and bloody, as wave after wave of sailors came after them from the Buster Call that had been summoned by the idiot who somehow got placed in charge of CP9.

Kaku openly gaped when Luffy sent Lucci flying, before immediately refocusing on taking down all the sailors he could in defense of his new crew.

There was a near miss with Yubashiri, Zoro nearly reacting too slowly to a threat directed at his  _ swords, _ and not him. He felt the desire  _ just _ in time to pull the sword back before the man could touch it, and then sheathed them, instead launching forward in a rage and rending the man limb-from-limb with nothing but his hands.

How  _ DARE _ he?!

_ HOW  _ **_DARE_ ** _ HE?! _

Even still… Zoro could tell, somehow, that this was the last battle in which Yubashiri would work with him, and his heart ached slightly at the growing disconnect with the blade.

Zoro would have to find a new wielder for the blade. One worthy of it.

But that was an issue for later.

For now, he had enemies to cut down.

\-----

They escaped onto the Merry, sailing away one final time.

Luffy looked at Kaku, as though noticing him for the very first time (and that was probably true, knowing his captain).

"Whoa! What's he doing here?!" He demanded.

"He wants to join us, captain." Zoro stated simply, getting a chorus of "WHAT?!?!?!"s from his nakama.

Kaku bowed deeply, head touching the ground.

"Please, let me be one of your nakama." He said, respectful and just a  _ touch _ desperate. He'd seen the devotion these pirates had for one another, and desperately wanted such a connection for himself. Desperately wanted the chance to reach for his dream that Zoro had offered just a couple nights ago.

Luffy stared down at him, expression utterly unreadable.

The rest of the crew stayed silent, arranged around him, awaiting their captain's decision.

"Zoro?" Luffy asked, voice serious and just a  _ touch _ imperious (it sent thrills of delight all the way through to Zoro's tar black soul).

"He can turn into a giraffe that can turn into a cube, captain." He reported immediately.

"Hmmmmm…" Luffy tilted his head to one side, frowning slightly as he regarded Kaku. Then, apparently reaching a decision, he grinned widely, "Cool! We needed a mascot!!" He exclaimed with delight, "Welcome aboard!"

There was a chorus of confusion and mild dissent from the others, but it subsided quickly. Once Luffy'd made a decision, there was no swaying his mind, after all.

Kaku blinked, surprised, and lifted his head slightly. (He didn't even try to protest the "mascot" declaration.)

"...That's it?" He asked.

"Yeah." Luffy answered simply, looking puzzled and perhaps a touch annoyed that Kaku wasn't getting it.

"But I was trying to kill you all not that long ago." Kaku pointed out, genuinely baffled.

"Yeah, but Zoro likes you, and I trust Zoro." Was all Luffy said in response, before he grinned, "And now we've got an artist!!" He whooped, throwing his arms up in the air.

And just like that, Kaku got dragged into the riptide that was the Strawhat Pirate crew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so Kaku is now *officially* a member of the Strawhat crew!!!! \O/
> 
> And Yubashiri is *NOT* dead! But Zoro still needs a new sword.


	39. Viking Funeral

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A farewell to a friend.

As miraculous as it was that the Going Merry had come for them on its own… Zoro could feel its soul wobbling terribly. 

Something was about to give.

He slipped into the hold to collect up anything they hadn't cleared out on the night of the duel. There wasn't much, but it was still worth keeping. 

Zoro could hear the ship groaning ominously, and he paused to rest a hand on one of the walls, doing everything in his power to send along every grateful thought and feeling he had for this incredible, wonderful ship and friend.

He felt the ship's desires pulse back, ever so faintly, and knew he had been heard.

He stepped back up on deck right in time to see Iceberg greeting them with the members of Galley-La and the Franky Family who had come with them to Enies Lobby…

Just in time for Merry to give one last groan and CRACK, splitting in half right there in the open ocean.

They all rapidly boarded Iceberg's vessel. To avoid outrage at his presence, Kaku Shaved up to lurk somewhere he wouldn't be seen. As expected from an assassin, he seemed to simply melt into the shadows like he was never there.

They had a sendoff for Merry. A proper Viking funeral: Setting her ablaze to sink into the depths.

Even Zoro was affected greatly by Merry's final words to them all, for all that he didn't shed a single tear.

\-----

After that, Zoro approached Luffy and Nami.

"Captain." He stated seriously, back straight and posture at attention.

Luffy looked at him, at his rigid posture and serious expression. Their eyes met, fathomless dark meeting wolfish amber, and held the gaze for several moments, before nodding once.

"Do it." He said.

Zoro was  _ delighted _ by the blanket permission in his Captain's statement. He knew Luffy knew what he meant, and his Captain had just given him permission to go through with it!

"Luffy? What did you just let Zoro do?" Nami asked suspiciously.

"Zoro's gonna get us a new ship!" Luffy answered simply as Zoro walked off.

Zoro didn't hear the rest of that conversation, because he walked out of range, in pursuit of his target. He found him, of course, so he leaned against the wall near him, arms crossed over his chest.

"You have connections." He began, "There anything you can do through 'em to make sure we get the best ship possible as a replacement?"

Franky stared at him for a moment, and then slowly nodded.

"Yeah… There might be a couple things I can do…" He said slowly, "But it'll cost a pretty beri."

"We have $400,000,000 we're willing to spend. $500,000,000, if we have to, though we'd prefer to keep that in reserve for emergencies." Zoro answered promptly, looking over at the cyborg.

Franky let out a low whistle at the amount.

"And you'd just give that to me, even after what I did to your sniper?" He asked, disbelieving.

"He's not our sniper anymore," Zoro stated, perhaps a bit too callously, before adding, "And I know that more can be done through illegal channels than legal ones."

Franky pursed his lips, frowning slightly, but eventually conceded the point.

"Fair enough, but you  _ really _ think trustin' me with all that cash is a good idea?"

"We trusted you with Robin and you didn't let us down." Zoro said in return.

The cyborg looked shaken, and then rubbed the back of his neck, looking a little flustered.

"I  _ know _ you're the best choice." Zoro continued, voice firm as he began to turn away, "You won't disappoint us."

The man had a dream, after all. Zoro could feel it waking back up within him. It aligned with what he wanted from the man perfectly. Aligned with his captain's wishes.

Zoro smirked to himself.

Checkmate.


	40. Fallout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not everyone is pleased about Kaku's presence.

The fact Kaku had come back with the Strawhat Pirates couldn't be concealed forever. 

"I told you to tell them they're  _ fired,  _ not to  _ recruit _ one of those traitorous bastards!!" Paulie exclaimed, glaring at Kaku.

Kaku pulled his hat down over his face and stepped back further, head bowed in deference to Paulie's perfectly reasonable outrage.

"Don't worry: He's my sex slave now." Zoro drawled as he leaned against a wall, smirking.

Everyone who heard his remark turned to stare at him in disbelief except Luffy, who ignored it in favor of picking his nose, and Kaku, who coughed softly and hid further down in the high collar of his jacket, pulling his hat even further over his face to hide his blush.

Paulie looked  **_SCANDALIZED,_ ** and choked on his cigar, eyes nearly bugging out of his head. His blush was  **_LUMINOUS._ **

_ "You…!" _ He exclaimed in a high-pitched and severely strained voice.

"Me?" Zoro asked with false innocence, pointing to himself. His eyes were wide as he blinked at the other man with false cluelessness.

"This is why you're dressed… like  _ THAT, _ isn't it?!" The shipwright exclaimed rather shrilly, motioning to Zoro's open jacket before storming forward to yank it shut, concealing Zoro's bare chest from view "It has a zipper for a  _ reason!!!!" _

Zoro blinked at him, honestly a bit nonplussed. Was this man  _ really _ telling him to wear more clothes and expose less skin?

That was a first.

Stepping back, Paulie cleared his throat and continued, more serious but still blushing furiously.

"I was worried about the shameless woman on your crew, leaving her legs so brazenly exposed," He began, "But I  _ should've _ been worrying about  _ YOU, _ you- you  **_SHAMELESS MAN!!!"_ **

Zoro blinked at him again, eyes widening before he barked out a laugh of surprised delight, a massive grin spreading across his face.

"'Shameless man'?" He asked, genuinely pleased, "I like that!"

He turned to Iceberg.

"Oi, you've got some sway with government types, right? Can you tell the Navy to make that my title on my next bounty poster?" He asked, pointing at Paulie while grinning widely.

Iceberg stroked his chin thoughtfully.

"Well, I could ask, but I can't guarantee results." He replied.

"'Shameless Man Zoro'... I like the sound of that." Zoro remarked, still grinning as he rested his chin on one hand, his other hand supporting his elbow.

Nami punched him upside the head.

"BE MORE SERIOUS!!" She shouted, teeth seeming to become fangs just for that moment.

Zoro rubbed the lump she left him with while shooting her a frown, pressing specifically to worsen the pain.

"Witch, I'm flattered, but as I keep telling you, you're not my type." He informed her seriously.

She raised her fist once more, holding furiously, fist trembling from the fierce of her ire.

"Zoro's type is blonds!" Luffy laughed.

"I  _ do _ have a fondness for men with light hair." Zoro admitted easily, nodding.

Paulie rapidly backed up.

"Stay back, you shameless man!!! I won't let you bewitch me like you did that traitor!!!"

Zoro raised one eyebrow and shot the shipwright a smirk.

"You sure?" He asked flirtatiously, "I could show you such incredible things~."

**_"NO!!!!"_ ** Paulie yelled, backing even further away, once more flushing a shade of red so brilliant his whole face seemed to be glowing.

Zoro laughed at him.

"Oh, don't worry: You may be blond and decently strong, but you're not quite…  _ dark _ enough for my tastes." He assured the man, smirking.

Once Paulie finally calmed down, he resumed scowling at Kaku, who continued to remain as silent and unobtrusive as possible.

"How can you feel safe enough to let  _ him _ join you, after all he and his did?" Paulie asked resentfully.

"Are you gonna betray us?" Luffy asked Kaku.

"I have no intentions of it, no." Kaku answered promptly.

Luffy turned back to Paulie with a wide grin that was completely confident in the truth of Kaku's words.

At Paulie's continued blustering about it, Kaku made an offer.

"Zoro, do you make deals?" He asked.

Zoro arched one eyebrow and turned to face Kaku, head tilting to one side in interest. 

"If the offer's good enough, yes." He agreed.

A small smile came to Kaku's face.

"If I sold you my soul, could I request that you be the one who tortures me when I end up in Hell? With the allowance that, should I betray you or the crew, my life is forfeit, but you still get my soul?" He very politely requested.

Zoro regarded him intently for a moment, and then smiled slightly, the expression cold and dark as black spread from his pupils to devour the entirety of his eyes.

"You  _ are _ a clever one, aren't you?" He asked rhetorically,  **"I accept."** His words resonated oddly as he stepped forward and held out one hand, still smiling a smile that was all teeth and no warmth.

Kaku took the offered hand with no hesitation, but couldn't quite suppress his shiver at the frigid coldness of Zoro's skin.

Zoro leaned in, lips almost touching Kaku's, eyes half-lidded as he gazed deep into Kaku's hazel eyes.

**"I look forward to the day I get to show you all of the excruciating ecstasies Hell has to offer."** He purred, grip tightening to the point Kaku's bones creaked under the strain, before abruptly releasing him and stepping back. His eyes faded back to their normal coloration, now that the dark magicks had worked to forge the contract binding them together.

The tune played on, sounding almost  _ smug _ in its satisfaction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had *SO MUCH FUN* writing Zoro and Paulie's interaction!! 
> 
> It was strongly inspired by an image I found on Google, but, since that only leads to a pin on Pinterest, I sadly can't link it. UnU


	41. Stars and Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle was won and it's time to party!
> 
> and
> 
> What decides the differences between men? Is it their memories? Their scars?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: References to past sexual content and alcohol consumption

They returned to Water 7, and were roomed in the Galley-La Headquarters. Franky had explained his plans to build his dream ship out of Adam wood, like the Oro Jackson built for Roger had been. He wanted the Strawhats to crew his dream ship. Luffy accepted with enthusiasm, and Zoro and Nami handed $400,000,000 of their $500,000,000 over to him. He thanked them, and left with promises that he'd make the "most SUPERRRR ship ever!"

Zoro believed him.

\-----

It was the after battle party, and it really seemed like everyone in Water 7 was attending.

Even Robin was having a good time, from what Zoro could tell from the content of her desires. His attention flicked away from her when he felt an unpleasantly familiar soul approach. His small smile dropped instantly, his full focus shifting onto the approaching enemy.

He met Luffy's eyes for just a moment, his captain silently asking if everything was fine, and Zoro equally silently replying that he'd make sure it would be. A minute nod from his captain before the boy-king returned to partying and playing. 

Zoro subtly moved closer to Robin, ready to act if things went south, but they didn't, and Aokiji left without further incident.

"Shall I hunt him for you?" Zoro asked as he melted out of the shadows, tilting his head as he seriously regarded his shaken nakama.

Robin visibly composed herself, and gave Zoro a small smile, silently appreciating his presence.

"No, I don't believe that will be necessary, Zoro." She told him.

"You sure?" He asked seriously. It would be a pleasure to make that man bleed…

Robin's smile grew slightly wider, almost as though she'd heard Zoro's last thought.

"Yes, I'm quite certain, thank you." She said firmly.

Zoro nodded and gave a grunt of understanding before wandering off as Robin was handed a meat skewer by the cook, the woman being swept up into the party after that.

Zoro snagged a bottle of sake, ripped off the top with his teeth, and chugged it as he passed through the party to find a quieter spot on the outskirts.

\-----

The cook headed towards him as the party wore down, and Zoro wondered when it became a tradition for them to spend quiet time together after an event like this.

He couldn't say he really minded, though: He liked spending time with the cook. It reminded him of-

Of…

Damn! Gone already!

Zoro sighed heavily, tilting his head back to stare up at the stars.

"Well damn, and here I decided to bring you a bottle of sake out of the kindness of my heart." The cook snarked as he sauntered over, one hand in a pocket, tube mentioned bottle of sake held in the other alongside two saucers. A cigarette hung from his mouth, like usual.

Zoro couldn't help the smile that quirked one corner of his lips up.

"You brought sake? Which one of us reads the desires of others, again?" He asked teasingly, reaching over.

The cook huffed in amusement and handed over one of the saucers before taking a seat next to Zoro.

"It's not exactly  _ hard _ to know you're an alcoholic, moss devil." The cook teased with a smirk as he expertly uncorked the bottle.

Zoro held out his saucer and the cook filled it without spilling a single drop before filling his own. They carefully clinked the saucers together with a quiet chorus of "Cheers."

Zoro would normally knock the liquor back, but he chose to take his time in savoring it, this time. He took a long, slow sip, closing his eyes as he held the liquor in his mouth for a few seconds before swallowing, enjoying the crisp, cool burn of the alcohol. He hummed appreciatively.

"So what had you looking all mopey, marimo?" The cook asked after a few moments of silence.

Zoro contemplated what to say, tilting his head back up to look at the stars.

"Y'ever think about the stars, cook?" He asked, rather than answering.

"The stars?" Sanji asked, "What about 'em?"

"Did y'know that some of 'em are so far away, they're dead and gone by the time we see their light?"

"Really?"

Zoro hummed in affirmation, still staring up at those distant little dots of light in the sky.

"And yet we'll still get to see that light for thousands of years to come, even though the source is gone." He mused, taking another sip of the sake, "Memories are kinda like that, too, ain't they?" He realized.

The cook remained silent, simply looking at him. Then, slowly, he nodded.

"Yeah, I guess that's true. You remember things even a long time after the event itself ends. Remember people long after they've left your life forever. I guess that  _ is _ kinda like what you're saying about stars."

Zoro hummed in agreement, and a comfortable silence fell between them, and then…

"Why him?" The cook asked, finally voicing the question he'd wanted to ask since Enies Lobby.

Zoro fell silent, contemplating his answer.

"Is it 'cause you fucked him?" The cook continued, and Zoro couldn't help the loud bark of laughter that escaped him.

"He  _ was _ a fantastic lay, but if anything, me fucking him would've been incentive to  _ kill _ him!" He said, cackling at the mere  _ thought _ that merely having sex with someone would inspire him to give a shit about them.

The cook  _ did _ have the grace to look sheepish as he realized the truth of Zoro's words.

"Right, forgot you're a damn black widow." He said, chagrined.

"I  _ do _ eat most of my mates." Zoro agreed, still snickering.

"Alright, so if it's not because you fucked him… Then why? What makes  _ him _ special?"

Zoro once more fell silent to contemplate what he wanted to say in response.

There were a lot of reasons why he brought Kaku with him. Why he encouraged Luffy to accept him. 

He'd be useful, after all: He knew secret techniques that could help them all grow stronger. He knew secrets about the World Government that could help them evade capture...

But none of those were the real reason.

The real question was whether or not he wanted to tell the cook that reason or not.

In the end…

"He reminds me of myself." He chose to go with the truth, accepting a refill of his saucer from the cook.

It was true, after all: Kaku  _ did _ somewhat remind him of himself. Of who he used to be, just darker. Of who he was now, just lighter.

~~ Nothing but tools to be used. Tossed aside the moment they fail. And yet still they dreamed. ~~

The cook remained silent, digesting this information.

"Is that why you wanted his soul, even though you rejected mine?" The blond asked after exhaling a cloud of smoke from his lungs.

...Were they  _ still _ going on about that?

"I don't desire  _ your _ soul." Zoro answered immediately, looking over at the cook with a deep frown.

The cook scowled at him.

"Yeah yeah I know that already, you bastard." He snapped, "And I don't wanna give you my soul, anyway!"

"Then why won't you just let the topic drop already?" Zoro shot back, frustrated.

"'Cause I wanna know  _ why!" _ The cook exclaimed, voice rising.

"Why? Are you  _ jealous?" _ Zoro asked tauntingly.

"Hell no I'm not jealous! The fuck do I have to be jealous of?! You're just moss!" The cook snarled, getting really riled up.

Zoro grinned at him, all teeth and mania.

_ "Good." _ He said, words as sharp as his grin, "'Cause if you give me your heart, I'm gonna take you for everything you are."

The cook shuddered, staring at him wide eyed.

"...Yeah, no. That's not happening." He said, shaking himself.

"Good." Zoro repeated simply, relaxing and returning his attention to the sake the cook brought, picking up the bottle and refilling his own saucer before holding it out in a silent offer of a refill for the cook. An offer which was accepted.

They sat in silence for a bit, the cook still brooding over something.

"I guess I just wanna know… Do I remind you of the guy you went to Hell for, or something?" The cook asked, more quietly and hesitantly, as befitted such a delicate topic.

Zoro's mind paused, ears filling with imagined static and flesh buzzing just beneath the skin, like he was full of angry bees. The tune warbled and seemed to pitch slightly to one side before righting itself. He swore he could hear his own heart pounding.  


Zoro turned to meet the cook's eyes, staring for a long moment, pondering.

A realization came to him, and the tune almost seemed to miss a note, but continued without pause.

"...Your eyes." He murmured, a bit awed.  


"Huh? What about 'em?" The cook asked, frowning slightly.

"They're the same shade of blue." Zoro continued, lost in thought.

"So I  _ do _ remind you of him." The cook muttered, looking and sounding distinctly unhappy, a scowl on his face as he stared forward.  


"You do... but you don't." Zoro said in response, looking back down at the saucer he held in his hands, then over at the cook's hands. He took in their appearance: Slender and pale, with long, elegant fingers. Only a very few scars, in the form of nicks and tiny cuts. Calluses from handling cooking implements and from performing the handstands required for certain kicks of his. The skin of his hands was soft and mostly smooth, but they were still very clearly the hands of a man who worked for a living, even if it wasn't hard manual labor.

"Your hands are different." Zoro mused out loud, taking another sip from the saucer, "Different scars and calluses. Different shape." Glimpses of a blond wielding a rapier flickered past his mind's eye, "He wielded a sword. Was never as good as me, though."

"Huh. Well. I sure as hell don't wave swords around." The cook said, sounding a bit thoughtful.

"No, just knives." Zoro agreed, "Don't think he'd ever cooked a day in his life."

"Sounds like a loser." The cook snarked, and Zoro couldn't help snickering slightly.

"He was." He agreed with a smirk, "Idiot couldn't even do math right."

The cook snorted.

"Pathetic." He sneered playfully.

Zoro couldn't help snickering again, and the cook joined him.

The cook poured out the last of the sake into their saucers, and held up his own in a toast.

"To bullshit love!" He declared softly, and Zoro clinked his saucer against the cook's with a snort.

"I'll drink to that." He drawled, amused.

They spent the rest of the night in companionable silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few more hints and pieces of information for y'all! I hope you enjoyed the Robin/Zoro friendship moment and the Sanji/Zoro discussion!!! That conversation gave me a lot of trouble to get exactly how I wanted it, but I honestly like how it turned out!


	42. Artistry and Inquiries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaku's an artist, and all the Strawhats are beautiful people.

Most of the Strawhats were allowed to wander freely through Water 7, now that their reputations had been cleared. The only one  _ not _ allowed to wander freely was Kaku, who agreed to stay under house arrest in the room they'd all been given.

"It's fine!" He assured them with a smile and a dismissive wave of one hand, "I knew there'd be consequences, and it makes sense that I'm not welcome here anymore!"

His smile didn't waver at all, and he knew his acting was flawless, but his heart still twisted slightly at the reminder that he was no longer welcome in Water 7. He'd had some of his happiest memories there, and he'd genuinely  _ enjoyed _ being a shipwright for the Galley-La Company.

Well, hopefully he'd enjoy his time as one of the Strawhat Pirates just as much, if not more. Especially since he was being  _ encouraged _ to follow his dream, for once. He was certainly surrounded by fantastic potential models, too: Each and every member of the crew was  _ striking _ to look at in their own way.

Kaku could feel his fingers  _ itching _ with the need to create.

"Nami-san," He said politely as he walked over, "May I borrow a pen and some scrap paper?"

"Huh? Oh, sure, I guess." She answered, handing over a basic pen and some scraps of paper. 

Kaku accepted them with a smile and a small bow. 

"Thank you for your kindness, Nami-san, I'll pay you back the moment I'm able to." Kaku said gratefully before retreating to a spot near the window to work. He had some ideas he desperately wanted to work out the compositions for, and the best way to start on that was to do some thumbnail sketches.

Usually he preferred to use pencil or charcoal for these types of drawings, as they allowed him to erase lines and make changes, but he was hardly going to be  _ picky _ in the circumstances he was in! That would both be in poor taste and potentially get him even  _ further _ on the wrong side of the group he was now a part of! Far be it from Kaku to jeopardize his already shaky place on the crew!

Speaking of the group he was now a part of... He wondered, as he examined his latest compositional thumbnail, how many of the Strawhats would be willing to model for him, if he asked.

He was pretty sure Luffy-san would, but, as he watched his new captain very actively gorge on food while  _ sleeping, _ of all things... He got the sneaking suspicion that Luffy-san wouldn't be able to stay still long enough to do more than some gesture drawings. They'd be stunningly lively, given how animated the young captain was in everything he did. The proportions would be absolutely  _ fascinating _ to play with, too, now that Kaku thought of it! It honestly made him quite eager to capture some sketches of his captain in action!

The next Strawhat to come to mind was Zoro, and he would probably agree to model for Kaku easily enough; he struck Kaku as the sort who enjoyed preening and strutting beneath admiring attention, and Kaku couldn't deny that he was  _ very _ excited to use Zoro as a model. He'd wanted to paint the man since he'd first laid eyes on him in the crowd around Dock #1. The swordsman had a  _ fantastic _ body, all corded muscle and bronzed, scarred skin that contrasted  _ phenomenally _ with his mint green hair. To say nothing of how  _ piercing _ and  _ predatory _ his stare was! Kaku was very excited to see if he could replicate the demon's presence in art. To say nothing of the  _ symbolism _ he could play with, considering Zoro was a literal,  _ actual _ demon!! He already had some ideas floating around in his head that he was  _ very _ excited to try and bring to life.

Continuing down the line, Nami-san would probably model for Kaku, if he paid her enough, and he had to admit the idea was tempting: She was adorable, still holding the soft roundness of youth. Kaku could already tell she'd be  _ breathtaking _ once she fully matured. Casting her as a siren was already almost  _ too _ easy. Hm. Those thoughts sounded rather creepy, didn't they, considering she was probably far too young for him? He didn't mean it like that: He was admiring her in a strictly aesthetic sense. (Besides which, Kaku had the strong suspicion that she wasn't interested in  _ men, _ and he respected that.) She'd still look  _ stunning _ as an angel, faerie, or other ethereal beauty.

The last two members of the crew were equally beautiful, but.

Kaku got the feeling it'd be a  _ long _ while before he would be given the chance to paint Robin-san, which was perfectly understandable, but still a real shame: She was  _ beautiful.  _ Stately, elegant, refined, with eyes that seemed to peer straight through your soul and a smile that seemed to say she knew all your secrets… A truly dangerous woman, and, well. Kaku had a weakness for dangerous people. If Nami-san was an angel, then Robin-san was a  _ fallen _ one, dark and devastating.

Kaku  _ really _ wanted to paint Sanji-san, too; his long legs and slim body were full of hidden strength, which, paired with his pretty, aristocratic features, would make him a striking addition to any picture. He was  _ dangerous, _ and fiery, and held an air of refinement that only just  _ barely _ covered the raging passion burning underneath. He was also so  _ animated _ and  _ graceful _ that he'd be almost as lively in an image as Luffy san! Absolutely stunning to see, especially if paired and contrasted with Zoro. Kaku had a feeling he wouldn't be getting the opportunity to paint the chef any time soon, though.

_ 'Just a hunch, _ ' Kaku thought wryly as he used the corner of his eye to glance at the dark look the chef was shooting him.

"So what're you working on?" Zoro asked from right next to him, and had Kaku been any less trained and disciplined, he would've startled. He hadn't noticed the swordsman approaching.

"Oh, nothing much," He answered, not showing the beat he'd missed due to being startled, "Just some thumbnail sketches to map out possible compositions."

Zoro peered over his shoulder at the sketches, which were really more just tiny blobs and lines arranged in a blobby setting than anything refined.

"Interesting." The demon noted in a nonjudgmental tone.

"I know, they're not very impressive, are they?" Kaku laughed, not taking any offense, "But they're just little test doodles, so they're not meant to be."

"Is this one meant to be me?" Zoro asked in amusement, pointing at one of the thumbnails Kaku had sketched.

Kaku laughed a bit more sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. Zoro  _ would _ ask that about the most suggestively posed figure Kaku had doodled.

"I mean… It could be, if you wanted to pose for it?" He offered, still smiling. 

(Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Sanji-san's glare sharpen, and if looks could kill… But why would he be so much angrier all of a sudden, he was just talking to -

_ 'Ah.' _ Kaku realized, glancing towards Zoro, _ 'So it's like  _ **_that,_ ** _ then?') _

Zoro gave a sharp smile in return, a hint of teeth flashing from between his lips right before he laid down and sprawled out, resting his head on one palm, the elbow stretched out before him. His torso twisted so he was belly up, legs spread in an almost scandalous way, the knee further away from Kaku bent so it stood up while the other leg stretched out. His free hand rested upon his stomach. He smirked over at Kaku, eyes half-lidded. (It was, of course, the exact pose that was in the sketch Zoro had pointed out.)

"Draw me like one of your French girls, giraffe man." He purred, and Kaku felt heat shooting through him at the sound...but Zoro's words gave him pause.

"I would love to, but I'm afraid I don't actually know what a "French girl" looks like." Kaku admitted.

Zoro blinked at him, looking puzzled.

"You don't know about France?" He asked.

"Ah, no, I'm afraid I don't. Is it an island you've been to in the past?" Kaku asked, tilting his head in curiosity, still smiling politely.

"France isn't an island. It's a country. Connected to all the other countries in Europe." Zoro elaborated, but Kaku had never heard of such a place before. He supposed his incomprehension must show on his face, because Zoro continued, "Near the Atlantic Ocean?"

"Atlantic Ocean? Which of the Blues is that in?" Kaku asked curiously, now really fascinated by these strange places his fellow swordsman was listing.

Zoro fell silent, face blank. He didn't seem to know how to react to Kaku's lack of knowledge of the places he'd spoken of.

"I'm also quite fascinated to hear about these places, Zoro; I've never heard or read about them before." Robin-san mentioned, speaking up.

Zoro remained silent, then, slowly, he began to speak.

"Huh." He said, sounding blank, "Maybe I'm remembering wrong?"

Kaku decided to change the subject.

"So, you're a demon, right?" He asked, setting down the pen and paper to focus more fully on Zoro.

"Yeah." Said demon answered, latching onto the subject change like a drowning man to a lifeline.

"Do you have any special demon powers?" He asked, genuinely curious.

"I can store things in a pocket dimension." Zoro listed, ticking off fingers as he went, "Don't need to breathe, eat, or drink, immune to poison, can't be killed by conventional means…"

"Wait, you don't need to eat?" Sanji-san spoke up, looking surprised.

Several of the others did, too.

Zoro blinked.

"I'm dead." He stated bluntly, "If my heart doesn't beat and I don't need to breathe, then why in Hell would I require food or water?"

Everyone fell silent as they contemplated this.

"Wait. But you eat everything given to you." Sanji-san protested, frowning.

"Just because I  _ can  _ eat doesn't mean I  _ have _ to." Zoro said with a careless shrug.

"Makes sense." Kaku agreed, "You probably don't get tired, either, since you don't require energy or air the way the rest of us do."

"That's right; I can go  _ all night long." _ Zoro purred with a bat of his lashes.

"You're dead, so you don't need to sleep." Kaku agreed with a nod, understanding completely.

"Yup." Zoro confirmed.

"Wait! But you're  **_always_ ** sleeping, you lazy bastard!" Nami-san exclaimed, looking quite angry.

Zoro shrugged, looking entirely unrepentant. 

"Sloth is a sin." He stated, as though that explained everything, and, to a degree, it did...or at least it did if you tilted your head and squinted really hard.

"If you don't need to sleep, then help out more often instead of sleeping!!!" Nami-san shouted, glaring.

Zoro glared back. 

"I already take all the night watch shifts! What more do you want of me?!" He demanded.

_ "FOR YOU TO PITCH IN MORE WITH THE REST OF THE WORK!!!" _

_ "FINE, THEN I'LL MAN THE HELM!"  _

_"OH HELL_ ** _NO_** _YOU'RE_ ** _NOT!!!"_** Nami-san screeched, somehow even _angrier_ at the thought of that. 

"The last thing we need is the wayward moss steering the ship and ruining Nami-san's navigation work!" Sanji-san interjected, smirking tauntingly at Zoro, who glared back.

**_"I DO NOT GET LOST!!"_ ** Zoro shouted, absolutely livid, he then visibly forced himself to calm down, looking positively petulant, "Things just keep moving around on me."

"Yeah,  _ su~ure _ they do, marimo." Sanji-san drawled.

"Is there anything else, Zoro?" Robin-san interjected, sounding curious, an amused tilt to her lips, "I've read that demons can change their shape at will. Is that something which you can do?"

Zoro blinked, the change in mental tracks visible.

"No." He said instantly, before grimacing slightly, "Well. Kind of, but not like you're thinking."

"Oh?" Robin-san asked, eyes widening slightly in interest, "Are you saying that you can, but it's limited in some way?"

"I can only be me." Zoro answered, sounding a bit cagey.

"So you can't change shape at all, is what you're saying." Sanji-san stated dryly, giving Zoro a taunting smirk.

"I can." Zoro denied, shooting a dark look towards Sanji-san, then grimaced realizing he'd been dragged into saying more than he wanted to, "But only into other versions of myself."

"What other versions of you are there?"

Zoro did not answer.

He turned away and ignored any further prompting on the topic, face carefully neutral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was a genuine joy to get the chance to ramble about art, seeing as I am actually an art college graduate daskjldjlkf;
> 
> I, personally, *hate* doing gesture drawings. The point of 'em is that you gotta capture the motion/pose as quickly as possible, and then move on to a different one, but my brain doesn't like having to shift gears so quickly! Thumbnail sketches, on the other hand, are very fun and also really useful! I love art.


	43. The Monkey Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knew one family could have so many wildly different yet important members?

Zoro was out on an island of scrapped ships, sitting cross-legged on a broken mast, Yubashiri held in one hand as he contemplated the sword. It wasn't going to  _ turn _ on him - or not  _ yet, _ at least - but. He could feel how much it didn't want to work with him anymore, and he felt a vague pang of melancholy over it. It was a fantastic blade, but.

Its nature and desires simply didn't mesh with Zoro's. It was too honorable. Too noble. Too  _ protective _ in nature.

_ 'Like Wado Ichimonji used to be…' _ Zoro mused softly, resting his free hand atop the hilt of the white sword, and feeling its usual echo of himself thrumming back from it. It had been with him since…

Well. He couldn't remember there ever being a time he  _ hadn't _ had the blade with him. Which didn't really  _ mean _ much, considering, but… It was as much a part of him as his arms and hands and head.

Whatever honor the blade had once held, it had lost, and that saddened Zoro, just a little. The sword's hilt seemed to warm beneath his touch, reminding him that just as Zoro didn't regret the decision he'd made, neither did Wado Ichimonji. Zoro closed his eyes, sighed softly through his nose, and let go of the not-quite-regret; there was no use in mourning the consequences of an action neither of them regretted.

He opened his eyes again and once more contemplated Yubashiri, wondering who he would give the blade to, and how he would ever possibly replace it.

A glimpse of dangerously familiar teal caught his eye, and his attention snapped over to it, and he paused, eyes widening slightly.

_ 'Ah. Fuck.' _ He got up and began running back to where his nakama were.

Somehow… He instead ended up at the cove where they'd had the Merry.

"Give me a break… Is this island a damn maze?!" He hissed to himself, turning around and sprinting off in the direction he  _ thought _ would lead him to his nakama.

Things moved around on him, and he somehow ended up right back where he'd started.

_ "Dammit!" _ He hissed furiously. He didn't have  _ time _ to deal with this place moving around on him like this!!!

"Hey pops! We haven't seen your face around here." A kid said, approaching with intent to try and mug him.

"We'd like to have a word with you." The other chimed in.

Zoro slowly turned around, glaring, his mood violent.

"Oh yeah?" He asked, voice low and menacing.

They ended up leading him back to where he needed to go...but the marines were already there, so he drew the two swords willing to work with him and just started swinging, smashing them aside to get to his captain.

Two slightly stronger weaklings landed in front of him. They were...vaguely familiar.

The blond - Helmeppo? Why did that name and soul seem familiar? - used kukris. It was about the only thing of note about him.

"Kukris, huh? It's not often that you see those." He noted out loud, smirking with open bloodlust. He decided to play a bit with this one.

"Hey, Zoro, wait! You don't have to fight!" His captain called out as he began running over, only to be kicked by the pink haired one - Coby? Another oddly familiar name and soul - and begin fighting him.

Zoro and his captain took down their targets at the same time, Luffy holding his down with a fist cocked back, and Zoro with a sword on either side of his opponent's neck, having knocked the kukris away with laughable ease once he was done playing.

An older man - obviously higher in rank than these two - walked over, laughing uproariously.

"You guys are no match for them at all!" He laughed, looking oddly pleased.

"You really are strong." Coby said, voice a bit strained from how Luffy was holding him down, "I'd expect no less from you!"

Luffy paused, pulling back a bit.

"I concede!" Coby continued, and Luffy let him up as Zoro sheathed his swords.

"Luffy-san! Zoro-san! It's been a while. Do you recognize me?" He asked, brushing off his pants.

Luffy stared blankly at him.

"Who are you?"

"You're that scaredy-cat pink boy." Zoro finally recognized.

Coby laughed, taking no offense.

"Ahaha… Yeah, that's me! The Coby who was a hopeless crybaby!" He admitted freely, grinning.

"WHAT? IS THAT TRUE?!" Luffy screeched, so shocked his eyes were nearly bugging out of his head as he reared back.

"Why are you in the Grand Line with that old guy?" Zoro asked, given that last time they'd seen Coby, he was back in Shells Town, in the East Blue.

"I've still got a ways to go to become a Navy Officer," Coby began excitedly, "but when I heard that you were nearby, I just wanted to see you guys so badly!"

Luffy continued to be shocked.

Coby saluted them with textbook perfect form.

"We owe you two for helping us become who we are now!" He said with a wide grin.

"Well, I wouldn't go that far, but…" The blond began, and Zoro narrowed his eyes at him slightly, head tilting to the right as he tried to place where he knew him from. It was right on the tip of his tongue…

Coby explained that Vice Admiral Garp was currently training himself and his blond friend, but Zoro wasn't really listening, more intent on trying to figure out how he knew the blond.

"Oh." He said out loud, finally remembering, "It's  _ you." _ His tone was flat, and honestly rather disappointed.

"Oi! What's that for?!" The man demanded.

"I think I'm allowed to be disappointed when recognizing such an inept torturer." Zoro stated flatly, arms crossed over his chest as he stood next to his captain.

"Oh, the guy who tried to kill you?" Luffy recalled.

"If you can call it that."

Luffy stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry, equally as disappointed as Zoro.

_ "I still can't stand these guys, Coby!" _ Helmeppo wailed melodramatically.

"It can't be helped, Helmeppo-san." Coby soothed, "You should accept the past."

"Oh, that?" Luffy asked.

"Yeah, that." Zoro confirmed.

"Luffy-san, you and I are now enemies, but…" Coby began.

Luffy perked up, paying more attention.

"...Are we still… Um…"

"Yeah. We're friends." Luffy agreed easily, smiling.

Coby looked  _ overjoyed. _

"Well then, you guys!" Garp exclaimed loudly, drawing the attention of his troops, "Repair this wall." He ordered, jabbing a thumb at the hole in the wall.

His men were not well pleased with the order, given that Garp had made the hole in the first place. Which he'd apparently done because it was "cooler" to enter like that (which...fair). His men insisted he help with the repairs, much to the Vice Admiral's shock.

The man was  _ exactly _ like Luffy, and Zoro decided he was very firmly Not His Problem. He had his hands full enough just dealing with his captain.

"I thought your grandpa was a big shot." The cook mentioned, as they all watched the repairs happen.

"Well… I don't know much about his job." Luffy admitted.

"Come to think of it, Luffy…" Garp began, pausing his work to look back at his grandson, "I heard that you saw your old man."

...They'd met Luffy's father?

When?

"What?! My dad?" Luffy questioned, equally shocked, "What do you mean by my dad? I have a dad?"

"Oh, then he didn't tell you who he was?" Garp asked while picking his nose with his pinky, "I heard he saw you off at Loguetown."

Zoro didn't recall anything like that happening, and clearly, neither did anyone else.

"Wh-what's my dad like?" Luffy asked.

"I'm curious… about Luffy's father!" Nami admitted quietly.

Zoro could feel the same desire reflected from basically everyone around him, with the exception of his captain, who didn't really care.

"Your father's name is… Monkey D. Dragon! He's a revolutionary!" Garp explained, like he hadn't just dropped a potentially life-changing revelation.

...The name didn't ring a bell for Zoro, but it apparently did for everyone else but Luffy, as they all recoiled in shock. Good to know Luffy wasn't the only rebel in his family, though, he supposed.

...Oh. Apparently this "Dragon" guy was pretty infamous. Zoro supposed that was only fitting, for a relative of his little captain.

"Oi, guys… What are you all so surprised for?" Luffy asked.

"Idiot! You don't know the name of Dragon!?" The cook demanded, looking like he was about to blow a fuse.

"Your father is a dangerous man!" The witch added, looking just as freaked out as the cook.

Even Kaku and Robin looked shaken.

"The most wanted man in the world…" The former government assassin breathed out, eyes wide.

"Huh?" Luffy wondered, looking at everyone's shell shocked faces (and Zoro's blank one), "Oi, Robin…?"

"How can I explain this…?" She wondered out loud, tapping her chin, "Pirates wouldn't start a fight with the Government or Navy, but there's a power trying to bring down the World Government directly now. That's the revolutionary army." She explained, looking deadly serious, "Isn't that right, Assassin-san?" She added, shooting Kaku a glance.

"Yeah, it is." He confirmed with a nod, frowning deeply, arms crossed over his chest, "The World Government wants the revolutionary army dead so badly that families get wiped out if they're so much as  _ suspected _ of even just  _ supporting _ it." He added grimly, "And the revolutionary Dragon is the one in charge of that army. It's no exaggeration to say that he's the most wanted man in the entire world."

"Their ideology has now spread in many countries around the world," Robin continued, picking up where Kaku left off, "which caused rebellions and led several kingdoms to fall. The government naturally became angry and has been searching everywhere for their mastermind, Dragon, all this time."

"But no one knows anything about him." Kaku continued, "So he's managed to evade capture and execution. If it got out that you're related to that man… it'd be a massive target pinned on your back, Captain."

"Ah! I guess…" Garp began, turning around and scratching his head, looking sheepish, "I shouldn't have said anything about it, huh? So just forget I mentioned it!"

Zoro's face went deadpan, staring at him. Did he seriously think that would work? What an idiot…

\-----

Coby's crush on Zoro's captain was rather adorable, however. His desires were so  _ innocent.  _ He just wanted to prove himself to Luffy in a fight, and then perhaps hold his hand. Perhaps embrace him, if he were feeling bold. How very  _ sweet. _

Zoro was almost as repulsed as he was amused. Truly, Coby was a Good Man.

Thankfully, the sailors all departed without further incident...or any further world shaking revelations.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another fairly lighthearted chapter!!! Also, Kaku and Robin play well off of one another; I was surprised!


	44. Kindred Spirits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Birds of a feather flock together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: References to violence and government corruption, and some truly morbid and dark conversational topics

Zoro looked at the snail. 

The snail stared back, murder in its eyestalks.

Zoro tilted his head. 

The snail mirrored the action.

Zoro reached out one hand.

The snail bared its teeth and chattered them rapidly at him. The action and sound were oddly familiar.

Zoro smiled, and patted its mottled white and red shell before turning to the shopkeep, who was staring at them in shock.

"I like this one; I'll take it."

"100 beri!" The owner exclaimed, voice a bit squeaky. Zoro put the money down on the counter, the snail on his shoulder. The snail chittered and chattered its teeth in excitement.

They walked out of the store like that.

\-----

Kaku had been on house arrest for several days, by this point, and while he didn't  _ really _ mind not going anywhere… Okay, that was a lie: He very badly wanted to go out and stretch his legs, but he knew all the reasons why he  _ shouldn't _ do that, so he didn't.

He'd prefer not to cause any further problems for his new group so soon after joining, even if he got the feeling his new captain wouldn't really care if he did (he'd probably call it "an adventure," if Kaku was reading him right, and Kaku was pretty sure he was).

Still… Kaku was bored. There was only so much one could do while confined to a single room, no matter  _ how  _ spacious.

Just as Kaku sighed softly to himself and turned to shoot another longing look out the window, Zoro returned, carrying a large number of bags… and he was wearing what looked to be a handmade yellow, sleeveless crop top, for some reason? 

It barely fit him, pulled so tight across his chest and shoulders that it looked like it'd tear apart if he so much as  _ breathed _ wrong, but clearly it was tougher than it looked, given he was hauling large bags along and it wasn't in pieces.

Zoro's gaze shifted onto Kaku and he beelined towards him, pausing only momentarily to set something - Kaku couldn't see what - on the table before reaching Kaku's side. He placed all the bags he was carrying on the floor next to Kaku.

"Grabbed your stuff." He said simply, brushing off his hands and then pulling off the crop top in one smooth motion.

"Oh! Thank you! I. Had honestly expected them to have disposed of it all, by now." Kaku said, blinking in surprise. It's what he would've done in their place, after all. Probably by torching the place to the ground so he wouldn't have to actually look at it all.

"They were gonna lock it all up, but I…  _ convinced _ them to give it to me." Zoro purred, smirking back at Kaku over his heavily scarred shoulder.

Kaku nodded in response.

"That's two I owe you, then." He said simply, "Even if it  _ is _ a bit redundant to owe you favors, since you already own me."

The demon smirked at him, visibly amused by his statement.

"True," He agreed easily with a shallow nod, "But let's keep  _ that _ part between us: The others get so...  _ twitchy _ about such things." He added in a conspiratorial tone.

"Well, slavery  _ is _ generally frowned upon in most civilized cultures." Kaku replied idly, looking through what Zoro had brought him. It wasn't  _ everything _ that Kaku had owned, but it was everything  _ important _ (so toiletries, art supplies, clothes, tools).

Zoro chuckled darkly as he pulled back on the shirt he'd left the room in, heading towards the small kitchenette.

"I've found that most so-called 'civilized' societies function on the backs and bodies of the exploited and oppressed. Might not be  _ called _ slavery, but we both know it may as well be." He said with grim amusement as he rummaged through the fridge.

Kaku tilted his head left and then right before nodding.

"Yeah, you're right." He agreed. He'd know, after all, having been all over the place on missions for the World Government, and being aware of how deep the corruption spread through everything, "It's part of why everything's gone where the pepper grows."

Another amused glance back.

_ "Quite." _ The demon purred as he closed the fridge and began walking over to the table, "I, myself, am quite fond of the bloody revolutions that usually follow such exploitation~."

Kaku laughed lightly, genuinely tickled pink at the admission, because  _ of course _ a devil like Zoro would enjoy such things! Though, Kaku couldn't really say he was any better.

"Yeah, I find that part pretty fun, too, especially when you're playing both sides against each other." He agreed with an easy smile. He'd had several missions aimed at sowing discord like that, in the past.

Zoro smiled back, eyes lighting up with interest as he turned towards Kaku after having set what he'd taken from the fridge down on the table.

"Ah, yesss…" He hissed with pleasure, eyes narrowing in obvious pleasure, "Inciting the anger of the masses after having contributed to why they're all suffering in the first place…"

"It's like having your cake and eating it, too!" Kaku finished, his own grin widening probably a bit too much for such a dark topic.

Zoro laughed maliciously, head tipping back and exposing the smooth, tan lines of his throat. The sound sent pleasant shivers down Kaku's spine; Zoro really  _ was _ beautiful.

Zoro moved slightly, and Kaku finally saw what he'd set on the table earlier: A transponder snail. It was bright white, with splashes of red across its skin and shell, looking almost like blood splatter.

_ 'Blood splatter from being behind something that's arteries got messily sliced open, to be specific.' _ He noted absently, with the clinical detachment that came from being an assassin. (Having once been an assassin? He wasn't sure if he still counted as an assassin, considering his current occupation was "artist".)

"You got a snail?" He asked, tilting his head to one side.

"Their name's Chatter." Zoro said simply, as thought that answered everything, and Kaku supposed that, in a way, it did.

"Looks like a white snail hybrid." Kaku noted, subtly eying Zoro for his response, to gauge if he actually knew what he'd just picked up.

Judging from the noncommittal grunt and the careless shrug of his shoulders, Zoro had  _ no idea _ what an incredible gem he'd found.

Well, assuming it truly  _ was _ a white transponder snail hybrid. Judging from the rig it was set up with, it was fully functional for making calls. If it  _ was _ also part white transponder snail… Well.

That would be huge.

"Where'd ya get it from?" He asked, keeping his tone casual, especially since the others were returning, judging from the sounds of chatter in the hall outside their room.

"Some store." Zoro replied with another shrug.

"You got a transponder snail?" Nami-san asked as she walked in with Chopper-kun, Sanji-san, and Robin-san. They all looked curiously at the snail, which was lazily munching lettuce from a plate set atop the table.

"Yeah. Figured it'd be useful to have one of 'em." Zoro answered easily, settling down by the wall near the windows and leaning back, hands behind his head. 

(Kaku rather thought Zoro had gotten the snail simply because he thought they were neat, but Kaku'd just keep that little theory to himself.)

"Well, yes, that's true." Nami-san admitted, "That was surprisingly thoughtful of you, Zoro." She added, shooting a more suspicious look the demon's way, "How much did it cost?"

"100 beri." Was the immediate response, and Kaku couldn't restrain the surprised blink that escaped him. 

"That's… a  _ remarkably _ low price for a transponder snail." He noted out loud. Especially for a hybrid  _ white _ transponder snail. White snails were so rare Kaku only knew vaguely about them being in use by the highest ups in the World Government, and of suspicions that high ranking members of the revolutionary army might have at least one, to help cover their communications and movements. Such a snail as this one was effectively  _ priceless. _

"Yeah, well, the owner was desperate to get rid of this one. Something about it having bitten off some fingers?" Zoro said with the casual disregard one might expect from a demon. He idly scratched his chin with one hand, eyes closed.

...Ah. That would explain it: A snail that bit fingers off was effectively useless for its intended role.

"...So you got us a snail that's exactly like you, then." Nami-san said flatly, giving Zoro a vaguely aggrieved stare.

Zoro tilted his head to one side before righting it.

"Yeah, guess I did." He agreed with a snicker, grinning slightly, "Their name's Chatter."

"Because it can be used to chat?" Chopper-kun asked, climbing up on a chair to peer curiously at the snail, which swiveled its eyestalks to regard him, in return.

"Nah." Zoro drawled lazily.

"Then why?"

The snail began rapidly and loudly clacking its teeth against each other while looking at Chopper-kun, giving a rather terrifying, skull-like grin. The little doctor squeaked in surprise and jerked back, and Kaku shaved over to catch him before he finished toppling off the chair and hit the ground.

"Careful there, Chopper-kun." He cautioned while gently setting the doctor down, smiling, "Wouldn't do for you to fall and hit your noggin!"

"Oh! Thank you, Kaku!" Chopper-kun exclaimed, giving Kaku a frankly adorable smile. (Oh, Kaku  _ very much _ wanted to immortalize that smile in a painting!)

"You're welcome!" Kaku nearly chirped in response, giving a slightly wider and more genuine smile, eyes scrunching happily, before he walked back to his place by his things, resuming his cataloguing of what he now had.

The snail continued to chatter its teeth at them, and honestly seemed  _ amused. _

_ "That's _ why their name is Chatter." Zoro stated simply, smirking before he stood and stretched, shirt riding up slightly and exposing a strip of bare skin as he did. He glanced over towards Kaku, and smirked when he caught him staring.

Kaku shamelessly met his eyes, and the devil smirked wider.

"Think I'm gonna head back out for a walk. You wanna join me?" He said, addressing Kaku.

Kaku shifted his head to the right.

"Well gee, I'd like to," He admitted, "But wouldn't that cause problems?"

"Aww, are you  _ worried _ about me?" The demon cooed, mockingly batting his lashes, a rather mean look in his slightly narrowed eyes.

Kaku laughed at the implied threat.

"Oh, perish the thought!" He exclaimed, dismissively waving one hand in front of his face, "I just don't wanna cause any further troubles for you folks."

"That's sweet, but if something comes up, then I'll handle it." Zoro stated with a dark undercurrent to his voice. There was a glint in his eyes that Kaku recognized well from seeing his own reflected in the mirror right before the violent conclusion to a mission: Bloodlust, hunger, eagerness to hunt.

"...Ah." Kaku said, mentally shifting into mission mode as he stood up and stretched, "Well in that case, I'd be pleased as punch to join you. Should I bring anything?"

His fellow swordsman flicked his gaze back over to Kaku, and he grinned, a sliver of far too many teeth to be anything but  _ blatantly predatory _ showing through his lips. Kaku couldn't help the shiver of bloodthirsty anticipation that thrummed under his skin.

"That depends on how far you wanna go with me." The demon purred, dark and dangerously seductive.

Kaku's polite smile widened a little further without his consent, becoming equally predatory as he straightened his cap.

"Sounds good! I think I'll just watch this time, though." He said, dark anticipation buzzing through him with every beat of his heart. He still picked a couple choice tools out of the bags of his things, and secreted them away on his person, just in case.

_ "Voyeur."  _ The demon crooned, linking one arm through Kaku's as they both headed towards the door, adding "Show me where the deviants dwell~."

"It would be my pleasure." Kaku responded honestly with a faux-chivalrous tone, grinning a bit too widely. He was  _ really _ looking forward to watching Zoro work, from an outside perspective.

"Wait, but! Won't Luffy be mad if you kill someone?" Nami-san asked, looking disturbed.

Zoro glanced back at her over the shoulder Kaku wasn't pressed against.

"Captain doesn't care who or what I do on my off time, so long as they deserve it." He drawled, magnificently smug, "And they  _ always _ deserve it."

With that, he and Kaku headed out the door, their nakama watching uneasily, likely realizing just how similar their newest crewmate was to their literally demonic first mate.

Kaku could feel Sanji-san glaring daggers at his back as he and Zoro walked out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a *minor* reminder that neither Zoro nor Kaku are good people, even if they *CHOOSE* to play nice with Certain, Select Individuals.
> 
> Also meet Chatter! I love Chatter. What a good (terrible) snail!


	45. Disagreement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If the captain bends their knee to someone else, are they still the captain?

"What? Usopp is coming back?!" Luffy asked, eyes wide.

Sanji took a deep drag of his cigarette as he sat casually in one of the wooden chairs, then turned more towards Luffy to answer his question.

"Yeah. He was by himself rehearsing how he'd rejoin us at the seashore." He confirmed, expression calm.

"FOR REAL?! So he wants to come back!" Luffy exclaimed, looking delighted and relieved, grinning wide. Nami and Chopper were smiling, too.

"Then let's go get him right away!!" Luffy declared, punching the air.

"YEAH!!!" Chopper squealed, leaping up into the air and waving his little hooves.

"That's Usopp for you. He never does anything the easy way." Nami added, looking vaguely chiding, but her eyes and the upward tilt of her lips reflected her immense relief.

_"Alright!_ Usopp is coming back~!!" Luffy cheered, beginning to head towards the door, a spring in his step, with Chopper following him and laughing delightedly.

_"Hold it,_ you guys!" Zoro barked, standing up from where he'd been napping against the wall and staring them all down with a deep, serious scowl on his face.

Luffy paused partway through turning the door's handle, and turned around to look at Zoro, eyes wide with curiosity.

The rest of the crew couldn't help but be equally curious; it wasn't often that Zoro spoke up about Luffy's decisions, after all.

"I won't permit any of you to go get him." Zoro continued seriously, tone severe.

**"HUH?!** Why not?!" Luffy demanded, raising his balled up fists, eyes narrowing in a fierce glare.

Zoro crossed his arms over his chest, the dying light of the setting sun coming through the window behind him casting harsh, stark shadows across his face.

The Strawhats all felt a pit of dread form in their guts, and they began shifting uneasily, frowning. The hairs on their arms and the backs of their necks stood on end as a sudden chill washed over them. 

_Zoro_ was questioning Luffy's decision? **_Zoro???_** But-  


But Zoro  _ never _ questioned Luffy's decisions! Cast doubt on them, sometimes, but he never just  **_rejected_ ** them like this! 

It felt like Usopp and Luffy's fight all over again, but somehow _worse._  


"Whatever you do, don't assume a subservient attitude towards him, Luffy." Zoro said seriously, the cadence of his voice was calm, and even, but the tone was dark with a slow, coldly brewing anger that crept over them all like frost. The words, though spoken softly, carried an immensely heavy weight, and they could all feel it pressing down on them. It felt like they were being suffocated by it.  


Luffy clearly felt it, too, as his anger immediately drained away, arms falling to his side as a concerned frown crossed his face.

"Zoro…" He murmured, barely audible. He'd clearly realized something the rest of them weren't privy to.  


"I'm not gonna accept him until he comes here with his head bowed." The demon stated severely, expression and tone as hard as stone.

"ZORO!  _ WHY?!" _ Chopper demanded, hopping up and down while visibly fuming, glaring fiercely as he shook his little hooves in anger.

"Hey! Who are you to decide..." Nami began, frowning deeply at the swordsman, hands on her hips before she began advancing on him like an oncoming storm.

**"SHUT UP!"** Zoro demanded. 

It was not a suggestion.

He'd raised his voice at them before, but not like this. 

This wasn't the all-bark-and-no-bite anger he usually aimed at them when he raised his voice.  _ This _ time, he was  _ actually _ angry, and the look in his eyes promised  **_pain_ ** if they didn't listen.   


Nami drew up short, eyes widening in surprise, and Chopper stopped raging as well, equally stunned.

Robin, Sanji, and Kaku continued watching in silence, expressions grim but betraying nothing of their personal feelings on the topic. They all had opinions on this, of course: Robin and Sanji both wanted Usopp back while Kaku was more ambivalent, but they all agreed with the points Zoro was making, even if it hurt. They were simply going to trust Luffy to make the right call.

"No matter what feelings were involved in Luffy and Usopp's argument..." Zoro said, in a calmer and quieter - though still lethally serious - voice, beginning to stride towards Luffy, back straight and head high. His expression was steely, and while his steps were as soft as always, they seemed to echo loudly in the silence that had fallen in the room.

Nami and Chopper stepped aside as Zoro passed, eyes wide as they watched him pull the white sword out of his haramaki, sheath and all.   


The same sword he'd made his oath to Luffy on, after his loss to Mihawk at the Baratie.

"Who was right and who was wrong… That doesn't matter." He continued, standing in front of Luffy and staring him in the eye, "When two men decide to have a duel, the only thing that matters is who wins."

Luffy's frown deepened and he looked down slightly, clearly remembering the duel. His lower lip was trembling slightly.

"He lost," Zoro said, not ceasing in the verbal blows he was delivering to them all, "and he left us of his own free will."

Sanji closed his eyes and sighed silently.

Zoro turned to look at the rest of them over his shoulder, stepping beside Luffy to tap him on the head with the hilt of his katana.

"Now listen up! This guy may be an idiot, but he's still our Captain." He said seriously with a severe look on his face, putting a subtle emphasis on the word 'captain'.

He then grabbed hold of one of Luffy's cheeks and pulled as he continued, "We're better off without a crewmate who can't respect the Captain when the going gets tough!" His expression and voice went ice cold as he finished with: "A crew that doesn't respect their captain, and a captain who doesn't deserve that respect… _is destined to fail."_

His words were like the tolling of a funeral bell, and the others all frowned in pain and conflicted emotions, because they knew he was right, but Usopp was their  _ friend! _ They didn't want to just give up on him! Surely they could talk this out?

Zoro turned back to look Luffy dead in the eyes, expression turning downright  _ dangerous. _

_"Listen!"_ He all but snarled at Luffy, his grip on the boy's rubber cheek tightening painfully as he dragged him closer, "I don't care if you want to act happy-go-lucky, but you're still the Captain and the one holding my contract. If you don't act like the Captain at a time like this…" He leaned in even further, a cold, cruel smile on his face as black consumed the colors and whites of his eyes, "Then the next one who leaves this crew will be _you,_ **_Captain."_** The last word was hissed almost _sarcastically._

There was no way to interpret what Zoro had said except as a  _ threat, _ and it left them all severely shaken. The room's temperature seemed to drop  _ sharply _ and the shadows all seemed so much darker and more ominous, like they were swallowing up the light around them.

**_"What?!"_ ** Chopper squeaked, rearing back and looking terrified.

"H-Hey! That won't solve anything!" Nami protested, putting her hands on her hips, "And you can't kill Luffy due to your contract, anyway!" That last part sounded far more like a desperate attempt to reassure herself than a direct rebuttal to Zoro's threat.

Zoro abruptly released Luffy, and the captain fell back towards Nami and Chopper, thrown by the force of his own cheek snapping back into place. The demon turned his cold, cruel expression towards the crew. The smile he aimed in Nami's direction was one of the most threatening things they'd ever seen.

"I can't kill him  _ directly, _ no. But there are  _ plenty  _ of ways around that little limitation." He said in a soft, deadly, and almost  _ conspiratorial _ voice before his expression slid back into the stern, serious scowl from earlier. 

(Somehow, it was a relief that he was now  _ glaring _ instead of smiling.)

"Don't get me wrong: It's good that Usopp wants to come back,  _ but." _ He stated, his frown deepening, "If he doesn't confess to what he did, and tries to sneak back on board like nothing happened?  **_I won't accept that, no matter what."_ ** The last words were almost  _ hissed, _ his eyes widening slightly, adding a slightly manic edge to his glare.  


"If that happens, we'll leave him on this island." He stated firmly and with finality.

_ "What?" _ Chopper gasped, and the shocked disbelief was evident on Luffy's and Nami's faces, as well, in their wide eyes and hanging jaws.

"Hold on, Zoro!" Nami interrupted, holding up one hand in an attempt to placate the demon's anger, "It's true that his actions weren't appropriate, but we can give him a good talking-to once he comes ba-"

She cut herself off at the click and rasp of Zoro drawing his sword from its sheath, her eyes going wide and a bead of sweat rolling down the side of her face. The sudden silence of the room was reinforced when Zoro violently stabbed the blade into the floor.

_ "So the fact that he left our crew means  _ **_nothing_ ** _ to you?!" _ He hissed venomously, staring her down with a lethal look in his eyes. His voice seemed to distort slightly, like other were voices layered over and under his own.

"No…" Nami admitted in a small voice, genuinely  _ scared _ of Zoro for the first time since she'd actually gotten to know the demon, "But-"

"Nami-san." Sanji interrupted with a sigh, his voice calm but grim as he rested his chin on the palm of his hand, looking her in the eye, completely serious and without so much as a _hint_ of his usual swooning, "Unfortunately, this time, what he's saying is correct."

The Strawhats were all shaken once again by the fact that Sanji was agreeing with  _ Zoro _ over  _ Nami. _ That was. Unbelievable. Almost as unbelievable as Zoro turning on Luffy.

And yet both of those things had happened in quick succession.

(Was the world ending?)

"If he pulls stunts like this on a whim, there's no way we can trust him going forward." Zoro continued, voice calm as he pulled his sword from where he'd embedded it in the floor.

Nami and Chopper jumped slightly at the motion, but Kaku, Robin, and Sanji continued to watch with unreadable expressions.

It was painful for Robin and Sanji to stand by and say nothing while the crew seemingly tore itself even further apart. (But this time  _ worse,  _ because it was  _ Zoro, _ the steady, dependable green devil who'd been there from the start, and  _ always _ supported Luffy's choices without question and now he was  _ threatening _ him and it was like the world had gone  _ mad.) _

And yet… They knew Zoro was right. They  _ agreed _ with him.

But it still hurt.

"Here's what it boils down to: If the first words coming from Usopp are a sincere apology, then we're all good. Otherwise, there's no place here for him to return to." His katana clicked back into its sheath, loud as a death knell in the silence.

"The things we're doing aren't pirate games for little brats!" He finished, voice cold and firm as he stared his captain dead in the eyes, silently daring him to disagree. His words were a blatant, vicious dig at the games Usopp had played with those kids back on his home island, and everyone knew it.

"...You're right. We went our separate ways." Luffy agreed, closing his eyes and lowering his head slightly, voice serious, "We still have several days before the ship gets completed and we set sail." He sat down on the floor, legs crossed, "Let's just stay here and wait for him." He decided, sounding despondent, but firm.

Zoro gave a single short nod, more a jerk of the head than a proper nod, and finally let his stiff-backed posture relax slightly. The coldness left his eyes, though a bit of the frown remained. He began to head back to the spot where he'd originally been napping against the wall.

"...Thank you, Zoro." Luffy said so softly the others almost thought they'd imagined it.

The demon paused in his steps.

"Don't falter again, Captain, or next time I might just kill you." He started with deadly seriousness, not looking back.

"I know." Luffy said in response, soft and serious. He also did not look back.  


Zoro resumed moving, and set his swords back down against the wall, then sat leaning against it, himself, closing his eyes, and for all intents and purposes appearing to fall asleep.

The tense, anxious silence continued for a long while after that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used *three separate sources* for the dialogue in this scene: The subbed anime, the English translation of the manga, and [kaizokuou-ni-naru's translation of the scene.](https://kaizokuou-ni-naru.tumblr.com/post/190464807603/thank-you-so-much-for-your-wonderful-blog-im)
> 
> And then added a whole host of additional little details to make it more interesting than just a simple retelling of the scene! I hope you all find it enjoyable!
> 
> Oh, and random fun fact for the previous chapter: When Kaku said "It's part of why everything's gone where the pepper grows," what he was really saying was "It's part of why everything's gone to hell"! The phrase "go where the pepper grows" is a Scandinavian and German saying that basically boils down to "go jump in a lake" or "go to hell" (at least according to a couple sites I looked at)!


	46. Obligatory Tragic Backstory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Are you really a Strawhat pirate if you don't have a big dream and a tragic past?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Potential TW for: Mentioned murders, heavily implied child death, and references to child abuse
> 
> I'm probably never gonna go into more detail than what's in this chapter, but it's basically tradition for there to be a tragic backstory reveal like. Right before or immediately after a new crewmate is recruited, so here's Kaku's!

Sanji didn't like Kaku. He didn't trust him in the slightest. The bastard was one of the ones who tried to hurt Robin-chan, and he was (supposedly-) _former government._ He'd been an _enemy_ not that long ago! How could he or anyone else trust him?!

 _'Robin used to be our enemy, too. What makes her different?'_ A traitorous voice that sounded a lot like Zoro whispered from the back of Sanji's head.

He pointedly ignored the voice, because it _was_ different, this time! Robin-chan hadn't had a choice! Forced to extremes by the same government that shitty giraffe served!

 _'How do you know_ **_he_ ** _wasn't just as forced as she was? You don't know his story.'_ That same voice asked, almost tauntingly.

He once more pointedly ignored it, focusing instead on how damn _chummy_ the stupid green swordsman was with the shitty assassin.

He ignored the nagging sensation in the back of his mind that told him _that_ was the part he was angriest about, because why the _hell_ would he care about that more than about the pain poor Robin-chan had been put through?! He was just pissed that the shitty marimo wasn't on the same page as he was, when he'd been so damn suspicious of Robin-chan when _she'd_ first joined!

 _'Then why are you so jealous?'_ The voice asked, sounding exactly like the mossy devil had when asking the same, just a few nights ago.

Sanji hated that the bastard was even invading his _thoughts._

Sanji was so busy fighting himself that he didn't notice when the topic shifted until he heard Robin-chan's beautiful voice speak to the shitty giraffe.

"You know quite a bit about the revolutionary army, assassin-san." She said, eying the man coolly, like a specimen she was particularly interested in dissecting.

"Well, I _was_ part of the assassination branch of Cipher Pol, the World Government's intel agency. It's only natural I'd know about the World Government's biggest enemies." The square-nosed man said with a modest voice, smiling politely, "The revolutionary army's such a big enemy to the World Government that, should someone even be _suspected_ of giving support to them, they and their families are wiped out. It's made to look like a tragic accident or a pirate attack, of course."

There was a pause as the room took this information in. Sanji couldn't say he cared much for how casually the shitty giraffe was acting while talking about atrocities like that. At least the fucker'd stopped _smiling_ while saying all that...

"How'd you even get mixed up with a shitty group like that, anyway?" Sanji asked, looking up from his food preparations to frown at the giraffe. It _wasn't_ because he wanted to know the guy's story, except, it also _was._

The man turned to face him and _smiled._

"They took me in when I was six, an' told me it was because my parents died in a pirate attack." He said with an almost _cheerful_ voice, as though his words hadn't just made the blood in Sanji's veins suddenly go cold.

Did… He just imply what Sanji _thought_ he'd implied?

"You mean like those coverups you were just telling us about…?" Nami-san asked, smiling a bit nervously.

The former assassin's smile didn't waver in the slightest as he said: 

"It would have been Very Ungrateful of me to question what I was told by the people who so graciously took me in after the brutal murders of my parents." The words were said pleasantly, but the look in his eyes, and the barely-there tightness in his expression were ones Sanji recognized from seeing himself in the mirror, some days.

And the very faint emphasis he'd put on the words "very ungrateful" was... _unnerving_ in its implications.

"And what happened if one was 'ungrateful'?" Robin-chan asked, eyes narrowing. 

"Well, I can't say for certain, but I'd hazard a guess that they got sent to their families." Kaku answered, still smiling.

Sanji's stomach dropped further.

"Really??" Chopper asked, eyes widening as a smile appeared on his face, completely missing the implications of Kaku's statement, "That's good!" He added with a sigh of relief.

Robin-chan, as sharp as a knife, _did_ catch the implications of Kaku's statement.

Sanji did, too. ( _'And there it is, the driving factor behind why he was serving the World Government: Serve, or die.'_ The voice in Sanji's head that sounded like the marimo said, grimly victorious.)

"And how many of those training with you had living families to return to?" Robin-chan asked.

Kaku's smile faded into a thoughtful look as he tilted his head slightly to the left and tapped his chin with the index finger of his right hand.

"Hmm…" He hummed, "Well, I never really spoke to all that many people in the program, but of those I did speak to, only Kalifa and Spandam had any living relatives, and since Spandam never went through CP9 training, I don't think he counts." He answered.

Chopper's face fell. 

"But, wait, then how would they be sent to their families?" He asked, still not getting it, probably through sheer denial of the truth. _('You'd know a lot about_ **_that,_ ** _wouldn't you, Sanji?')_

And then, suddenly, it clicked, and Chopper's eyes went wide.

 _"Oh."_ He said softly, horror written in the wideness of his eyes and the grimace on his face.

Sanji wished he could be surprised that the World Government would sink so low, but he really couldn't. He knew all too well how corruption ran straight to the top, and he'd seen plenty of evidence of it just in the past week.

However…

"How do we know you're telling the truth and not just trying to trick us so you can betray us to the World Government?" Sanji asked, narrowing his eyes.

"I failed my mission." Kaku stated frankly, expression serious as his smile dropped, "And even if my failure alone wouldn't have resulted in my termination - and it would have - I ensured they'd come for my head when I betrayed them to become a pirate. I've no doubt that they've already publicly published my name, face, and all known skills and aliases."

"A death sentence, for an assassin." Robin-chan said simply, expression calm but serious.

Kaku dipped his head in a nod.

"Very much so, yes." He confirmed.

"Unless it was planned." Sanji pointed out, glaring suspiciously.

Kaku blinked once, staring at him with slightly widened eyes. A second passed, and his head tilted back slightly as he let out a loud bark of laughter followed by uncontrolled chuckling as he leaned forward, grinning down at his lap.

"Sorry, sorry!" He chuckled, shaking his head ruefully as he straightened back up, "I shouldn't be laughing, 'cause that's honestly a perfectly reasonable thing to be worried about, but." His shoulders shook as he continued snickering, though he managed to look Sanji in the eye, expression reflecting his mirth.

 _"Golly,_ we-" He cut himself off and cleared his throat, "-Rather, _CP9_ \- genuinely never expected a rookie pirate crew like this one would be insane enough to storm _Enies Lobby_ to get back a crewmate who, by all appearances, had framed them for an assassination and betrayed them." He sounded genuinely amused, but also just a tiny bit awed, "And then even if you _were_ that insane, no one expected you to even reach the Tower of Justice, let alone defeat all of CP9 including _Rob Lucci."_

He smiled and shrugged.

"There was never any plan to infiltrate this crew, because no one expected you all to be mad as hatters! The threat you all posed was completely unexpected!" He finished, sounding a mix of sheepish and congratulatory as he scratched the back of his head, laughing softly.

His eyes opened and his smile vanished as he looked Sanji in the eyes, suddenly deadly serious.

"But you do have _every_ reason to mistrust me, and I respect that you do." He said seriously, before a somewhat rueful expression crossed his face, "Though I. Also have no doubt that, had he even _suspected_ there was a dog buried in all this, Zoro would've killed me on the spot."

That. Was oddly phrased, but a very good point, loathe as Sanji was to admit it. 

He shot a glance over at the demon, who was reading the newspaper and paying no mind to the conversation going on around him. Luffy was seated in his lap, cuddled up against his chest and napping, judging by the snoring coming from him.

Sanji wondered if Zoro already knew all of what Kaku had revealed to them. He claimed to know desires, and there was a lot of evidence saying that was the truth, so Sanji supposed it wouldn't be impossible for the demon to know more than _just_ desires. He wondered exactly _how_ much Zoro knew about those around him.

He wondered if he knew about ~~Them~~ the rock, and how long he'd ~~suffered~~ starved for. If he knew what ~~They~~ Zeff had done ~~to~~ for him.

He really hoped not.

As though sensing his anxiety, the demon spoke up, though the words weren't anything Sanji had expected.

"Looks like our bounties are gonna go up soon." The demon remarked, sounding pleased as he smirked down at the article he was reading.

Sanji supposed he'd never know how much the mossy bastard knew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those wondering, yes, the implications of Kaku's words *are* correct. He picked his words Very Specifically.
> 
> And I know I've been focusing on Kaku a lot, but I need to establish him as a character, since he really doesn't have much characterization going for him in the series, and I want you guys to care about him. This is one of the last chapters set in Water 7, however, and then we keep moving forward! Huzzah! Your wait is almost over!
> 
> Also, when Kaku says "had he even suspected there was a dog buried in all this" what he's saying is "had he even suspected I had a hidden motive." 
> 
> "There is a dog buried here" is a Swedish phrase used when something doesn't feel quite right and/or when you suspect someone is trying to hide something. I figure the best way to make Kaku sound old is to have him use a lot of idioms!


End file.
